Should a 13 year old have a Facebook account?

ninky_2

i'm so glad i don't have children!

facebook is all part of communicating in the modern world so yes it probably is a reasonable idea for him to have an account.

however, if i were you i would open an account for yourself first just to get a sense of what the whole thing is and how it works. do you have a friend who could help you and also explain the privacy settings - it's important to have a good grasp of these.

also, it's worth pointing out that what goes up on facebook is potentially out in the public domain forever. so any photos or comments you make could come back and bite you in future.

i know a friend was concerned about her teenage nephew writing very openly about his mental health issues on his facebook. she worried it could effect his future employment options.

post in haste regret at leisure could be a good motto (one i have not always kept to!). you should probably have a talk to him about that. pictures of yourself drunk, semi naked or comments about your sex life (maybe not for a 13 year old boy but it will happen...) are things he needs to be wary of. even if you set the privacy settings it's not that hard for a so-called friend to spread the word so to speak. things like facebook basically give us all the downside of celebrity without the actual genuine fame.....

chances are his mates could be posting pictures up with him in anyway.

omen666

Gemsgalore wrote: »

Well from watching Jeremy Vile and Tricia it seems to be the new way to find long lost family for free

then end up sleeping with them.......

Pee

I think you should get said child to set you up an account, show you, and you can them be persueded and allow them to have an account which as their friend you can see.

The points about it being public are important and often not realised by people, both young and old, so you should probably expect some minor stupidity, such as swearing.

If you are worried about it being time consuming, could you set a time period, say an hour and stick to that? To be honest I find it helps me learn more about computers, loading photographs etc although I do have a silly and unhealthy adiction to Farmville!!

baublebag

Why don't you just get an account yourself and see what it does????
It's free, and easy.
After >8800 posts on here you deserve a change of scenery ;-)

thriftlady_2

baublebag wrote: »

Why don't you just get an account yourself and see what it does????
It's free, and easy.
After >8800 posts on here you deserve a change of scenery ;-)

Well because I don't have any desire for one. As you point out I spend quite a lot of time on here and as I mentioned earlier blogging takes up a lot of my time now.

Thanks Gingernutmeg for those useful links I will definitely get him (and his brother) to do the quiz.

Thanks also Ninky for your useful point about photos etc.

Gingham_Ribbon

If you have an account, you can get messages from anyone else with an account. Though you can set your profile to only be seen by friends, there are some things you can't avoid people seeing, like your profile picture and name on every friend's list, and all your friends' names and pictures on your own profile.

However, it seems that some groups of friends are using their facebook accounts so much that every social situation that comes up gets sorted out on there, so those who don't have one can easily miss out and at that age, that's got to hurt!

Your call and yours only. I don't like it personally, but with close supervision I will probably allow my children to use it when I feel they are ready and understand how to keep an element of privacy on the net.

pigpen

From experience...

NO NO NO NO NO!!!!

I am currently in the midst of prosecuting a 24 year old guy who is 'grooming' my 15 year old daughter... It is stressful, time consuming and totally distressing!!

With the benefit of hindsight.. do not do it!!!!!!

That said.. I 'met' my OH on FB and he is just wonderful... but I'm NOT a child.

A lot of the applications have very adult content.. how many sexual partners/what position are you/which STI will you get etc etc.. not the kind of stuff I'd encourage.

thriftlady_2

pigpen wrote: »

A lot of the applications have very adult content.. how many sexual partners/what position are you/which STI will you get etc etc.. not the kind of stuff I'd encourage.

Wow Pigpen! That must be a horrendous experience for you.

But surely if you set up and account with parental controls those kind os sexual applications won't be available?

robpw2

pigpen wrote: »

From experience...

NO NO NO NO NO!!!!

I am currently in the midst of prosecuting a 24 year old guy who is 'grooming' my 15 year old daughter... It is stressful, time consuming and totally distressing!!

surely the crown are prosecuting ? as crimnnal offences are against the state

still - how did a 24 year old manage to groom your daughter
1. alll friend requests have to be accepted
2. you cant chat to anyone unless a friend
3 if your supervising your child on the computer then again why did you allow this to start

sorry didnt mean to sound so harsh just re-read it i sympathise with you about how distressing it must be - im just confused as fb seems to be so safe

Pee

I haven't used any of those adult applications, even though I am certainly over 18. There were some half dressed firemen we were sending pictures of to one another and some imaginery cocktails, which might not be a great example to a child.

If you set her account up together, then you will be able to check it, at random, and anything like that will mean that she is banned for a few weeks / as appropriate.

I am sorry to hear your problems pigpen, but the guy could have been grooming your daughter in another social situation and you would have been none the wiser. At least facebook is a public place.