Which baby milk?

bigup7

my 3 month old is on Aptamil first, finding it fine, had problems with wind at first, but we stuck with it and now he usually burps straight after each feed.

Danili

I have bottle fed my daughter exclusively from birth. I have never breast fed and had absolutely no inclination to try.

We started with Aptimil, but found she was feeding very frequently so swapped over to Cow and Gate, which seems to suit her much better.

All the benefits of breastfeeding are constantly plugged, but noone ever seems to mention the plus side of bottle feeding. Nearly every bottle fed baby I know has slept through the night from days old and seem to be a lot more independent. Apparently you need to breast feed to bond with your baby - if that is the case how are fathers supposed to build a bond too??. All the baby behavioural programmes (ie. Baby Whisperer, Mums the Word etc) are packed full of mums who are pulling their hair out trying to wean clingy toddlers off the breast.

Sorry to be controversial, but I think its about time that us 'dreaded 'bottlefeeding mums had our chance to defend our corner!

Jay-Jay_4

Danili wrote:

Sorry to be controversial, but I think its about time that us 'dreaded 'bottlefeeding mums had our chance to defend our corner!

I think this thread has been mainly bottle feeding Mums defending their corners

cookiesncream

Jay-Jay wrote:

I think this thread has been mainly bottle feeding Mums defending their corners

They wouldn't need to defend their personal decision if people didn't put so much pressure about 'keep trying' etc and making them feel lesser because of it. I've noticed this alot with friends of mine who were made to feel lesser mums because they didn't bf.

Jay-Jay_4

cookiesncream wrote:

They wouldn't need to defend their personal decision if people didn't put so much pressure about 'keep trying' etc and making them feel lesser because of it. I've noticed this alot with friends of mine who were made to feel lesser mums because they didn't bf.

But at what point does support become pressure? If someone 'wants' to feed, 'says' that they want to feed then they will get support.

Many women say that they do want to feed and then say that there's too much pressure when people try to help them.

If more women were honest and said "look, I really don't want to feed" then they would get left alone but SO many women say "I can't", "my baby can't/wont/couldn't/wouldn't" or "it's too hard", "I haven't got enough milk", "I've been told to top up" and that to me is a person in need of encouragement, support and help.

The OP's post was ambiguous. She didn't say that she wanted to bottle feed, nor did she say that she wanted to breastfeed, she stated that she was breastfeeding and that she had been told to 'top up'. That, to me, is someone who needs some support and correct advice on the process of breastfeeding so that she could continue and succeed. She sounded like a breastfeeder who had been given incorrect information as to her milk quality or supply and the consequences of supplimenting with formula.

If the OP comes back and says that she doesn't want to breastfeed then that's fine. No one's going to force someone to do it.

There are many of us that have breastfed and we know that many of the difficulties faced can be overcome but that often, Mums are given bad advice. We offer advice but are contantly beaten down my women telling us that we're pressurising them to breastfeed. We're not, we're trying to HELP!


People also think that breastfeeding Mums must have babies who are not 'hungry', or babies that are happy and contented. ALL babies are hungry! They're born hungry and they are born with the urge to suck. It's normal and natural for a newborn to be on the breast all day every day for weeks, it's normal for newborn babies to wake throughout the night and many women find breastfeeding very hard indeed for several months.

Lady_S

I am coming into this now, as someone who has never had a baby. I cannot offer any advice, but Jay Jay, you say that the first post was ambiguous, but you didn't give time and space to someone who has only just had a baby and isprobably feeling very vulnerable right now. You just latched on with a if you want to continue you can do this and this and this.

Whilst you think breast is best, it is not best for everyone and it seems that a few people need to learn to respect others opinions. Those who shout loudest are not always right.

Crispy_Ambulance

Lady_S wrote:

I am coming into this now, as someone who has never had a baby. I cannot offer any advice, but Jay Jay, you say that the first post was ambiguous, but you didn't give time and space to someone who has only just had a baby and isprobably feeling very vulnerable right now. You just latched on with a if you want to continue you can do this and this and this.

Whilst you think breast is best, it is not best for everyone and it seems that a few people need to learn to respect others opinions. Those who shout loudest are not always right.

You are right. Not everyone gets on with breastfeeding. However, if mums are to make an informed choice, the information given to them has to be correct. And there is absolutely no evidence that babies who are bottlefed have any advantages over those who are breastfed. Formula milk is not as good as breastmilk. It doesn't even compare. That isn't just my opinion - that is what the evidence tells us.

And the advice given to the OP was that if she wanted to breastfeed, she should carry on, even though her baby was feeding a lot. This is normal newborn behaviour and plenty of breastfeeding is sabotaged by bad advice, such as topping up when there is no need to. Sometimes all new parents need is to be told to keep on doing what they are doing and it will get better - AND it does! And I hope for the OP it has got better - by 6 weeks you will wonder why it seemed so hard!

funky-footprints

im pg with my 3rd and all the midwife wanted to talk about at my 10 week booking in scan was home birth and breast feeding ..um i was 10 week pregnant...there is plenty of time to talk about that !!

As a mum of two i already knew i wasnt interested in either ..so on my notes she wrote undecided !!!!
i was honest I told the midwife no.... yet where did she listen to my no !!!

In this house there is far too much pressure being put on by my midwife and mothers in law that think they know best !!!

bikerqueen

I really really want a home birth. and completely understand that it is not a solution for everyone!

I want to bottle feed too, have made no excuses, have been perfectly honest and said I dont want to, but still get hassled. ah well, i think im learning that whatever you do as a mum is wrong...

bumpybecky

I think if you've made an informed decision to breasfeed / bottlefeed / homebirth / hospital birth / birth up a tree then it's fine to tell the world, the midwife and the MIL to button it!

However, most people to be don't seem to bother to educate themselves so they are in a position to make an informed decision. They either do something 'cos their mum / mate/ fave celeb did it that way. I think that's a sad thing

Bikerqueen - I think you've hit the nail on the head - you're wrong in someone's view no matter what you do! :rolleyes:

Becky, who got criticised this weekend for *still* breastfeeding my baby (who's only 17mo!)