What chores would you expect from an 18-year-old living at home?

eklynne

God, I must be really lucky. DD (14) does the dishes every night after dinner (no dishwasher here, I don't believe in them!), does all her own laundry, walks the dog after school and every Sunday (the big clean) we half the house and do it between us (kitchen and bathroom both get scrubbed and all the floors get washed). She also helps my mum out 3 nights a week.
I have never been a SAHM, I have always worked/been in education as has my own mother so I have never known what it's like to have chores fall to one person. My brother does all the cooking and food shopping in his house, as this was one of the main chores he had when we were growing up. I think if it's made to seem 'normal' to muck in, you'll have no problems when they're teenagers and older.

Glamazon

My brother is a little bit older but he doesn't do any chores! He works full time as a PE Technician in a school and spends the weekends recovering in bed after a heavy Friday & Saturday night!

My sister is 18, is in college 3 days, works in a photographers 2 days and works evenings in a local pub so she doesn't do any chores either.

Well, actually they do wash up after tea but so do the foster kids. They all keep their own rooms tidy and do know how to use the washing machine if they needed to.

Mum works full time and is a foster carer, my step dad is also a foster carer and does a lot of driving for social services so is out the house most of the day.

Mum does their washing and ironing (although she only irons shirts) with everyone elses. They can both cook but don't cook for everyone as it would be steak rolls or bacon and egg every time! Also, not fair to expect them to cook for the foster kids as well as they can be fussy so often my Step-Dad cooks 2-3 meals a night.


They've got it good! When I lived at home, I helped out loads!

LondonDiva

http://www.beyondbakedbeans.com/

smartpicture

LondonDiva wrote: »

http://www.beyondbakedbeans.com/

Hmmm, I may have to point her in that direction.

I'm pleased to report we have had some success - she cooked a stir-fry from a jar for her first attempt, and then managed to do her own stir-fry without the jar on her second attempt, so there is progress. I'm not actually that keen on stir-fry but not going to mention that as the important fact is that I didn't have to cook it!

She's a great daughter really, just needs nudging in the right direction occasionally.

msb5262

I got an excellent book yesterday in The Works - "Beyond Baked Beans - BUDGET" by Fiona Beckett - reduced to 99p. Looks ideal for anyone of 18 so your daughter might find it useful.
MsB

ellies_angel

I live with my partner and his 18 year old daughter. I am a full time teacher and am also doing 2 part time uni courses. He is a student. Uni 3 days, working the other 2. She is at college 3 days. She "helps me" by cleaning her room and doing her washing.
We live in a 4 bedroom house with 2 down stairs loos, a bathroom and an ensuite. I do all the cleaning apart from her bedroom and the bathroom (which is her responsibility but hasn't been cleaned in months). I come home on her day off to discover she is just out of bed and going into the shower (4.45) and wants her tea. At a push she will cook for her and her boyfriend and her dad, but this very much depends on her mood. I once picked hr up from the bus stop because it was raining, stoppped at the top of the drive and asked her to jump out and bring the bin in, no was the reply, its not my job??!!
When I was 14 my mum worked full time, I cleaned out the fire and set it, I did all the cooking, washing, ironing, dusting and vacuming. This continued until I left home. Poor mum didn't know what had hit her when I left home!

Savvy_Sue

Gingham_Ribbon wrote: »

Part of a mum's job is to prepare her child for leaving home and that includes being able to cook, do laundry, plan a menu, shop and clean. If she doesn't take on these jobs, even on a rota, she'll be at a disadvantage when she leaves home.

Couldn't have said it better myself!

smartpicture wrote: »

but it would just be lovely to come home occasionally and not have to start thinking about what we're going to have to eat.

That's so true. It drives me round the bend when I ask DH to sort out tea and his first question is "What do you want me to cook?" Frankly, my dear, I don't give a d***, and you can look in the fridge and freezer as well as I can, can't you? Even if I had a menu plan on the fridge I think he would still ask!

smartpicture wrote: »

But she says it's a different world nowadays and being a teenager is so much more stressful now :rotfl:

Also :rotfl: at this, but my response would be "Yup, life is tough, life is hard, life is unfair, DEAL WITH IT!"

ninky wrote: »

one thing i do think is really important is if there are males in the house they shouldn't get away with not doing housework / cooking etc. i don't think it's right to teach girls that it's their job to do that sort of thing. let's not raise a(nother) generation of men who think that if they get the hoover out they are somehow doing a favour.

it's also an important lifeskill to learn how to put up a shelf, do simple DIY, change a tyre etc etc.

Yes, for both boys and girls. I was horrified to find a colleague in her 20s didn't know how to change an electric plug, or check if it was correctly wired. And I was going to tell the boys they couldn't leave home before learning to sew a button on, but DS1 and DS2 only wear shirts under protest, so it's only going to be an issue for DS3.

Nicolaj36

I am a single parent to two boys, 15 and 17, and a girl, 12. The only thing any of them do is clean their rooms after me nagging them for a week! :mad:

How do you get them to help? To me the aggro is just not worth it.

Mupette

smartpicture wrote: »

Just want some ideas of what's reasonable here, and as we can't agree we've decided you lot can be the tie-breaker!

My DD18 is at college doing A-levels and has a part-time job and I work full-time. Her jobs around the house are to keep her room and all her stuff tidy, do the dishwasher & clean the work-surfaces after dinner. We have a cleaner who also does the ironing. I do the washing, cooking, shopping, paying the bills and everything else. I think she should start doing some of the cooking, say a couple of times a week, or maybe do the Tesco run occasionally. She says I'm trying to treat her like a flat-mate rather than being a mum, because 'that's what mum's do'.

We don't argue, she's not a stroppy teenager and is normally quite mature and we have talked about it, but just can't agree on this issue. If I got cross and 'made' her, I'm sure she would do it, but since she's 18 now I'd prefer not to take that path. So, tie-breakers, what do you think?

Well you both work, she does college and part time and work, and you full time work, the ironing is taken care of, i would expect her to go 50/50 with the rest, its not a question of you treating her as a flat mate, that is her implying she expects you to do it all.

Tell her to do her share, or you'll treat her like a flat mate and do all your own stuff and leave her to do her own..

Savvy_Sue

Nicolaj36 wrote: »

I am a single parent to two boys, 15 and 17, and a girl, 12. The only thing any of them do is clean their rooms after me nagging them for a week! :mad:

How do you get them to help? To me the aggro is just not worth it.

I don't do things they want from me unless they've done what I want. No aggro, just a statement of fact: "Yes, of course I'll give you a lift / help you find / cook your tea ... when you have washed up."

At the moment I regularly ask DS3 to wash up before I get home from work (he's the only one here in term time). If he hasn't, I won't start cooking tea. And before anyone asks, I can't face the aggro of getting him to do it soon after a meal.