The giving up/cutting down alcohol thread part VI

yellowmonkey

Not AF tonight but only had a couple instead of the usual 10 so wont be in for this one Sparkles.

Good luck to you all though :T

fedupandskint

And lastly from me for a little while

I am HUFFing as usual tonight making it AFD 16 now!

I told a friend today I had stopped drinking when they told me to be careful how much I had to drink this weekend and they nearly fell off their chair.

They asked why?
I replied because I want to, it's toxic to me.
They responded mind you, look at you, you look...
and I interrupted I feel so much better
they said finally, yes I know what you mean, you feel better in ways you don't expect

I have had 2 drinks in 10 weeks - doing well with this abstaining thing now - no problems with it for me at the present time

Getting easier admitting it in public (like it's something to hide!)

fedupandskint

Ooh just realised we're over halfway through to month now!

YM - do you want me to include you again on the Mon-Thurs challenge again starting on Mon?

This will be the last week I run the next one as am on holiday the week after. Happy to pick it up again the week after in May

yellowmonkey

fedupandskint wrote: »

YM - do you want me to include you again on the Mon-Thurs challenge again starting on Mon?

Yes please Thanks

saorsie

Huffing tonight so will be on 15 please WBF - not sure bout the weekend challenge Sparkles as might be out tomorrow night and it 'might' be nice to have one or two - it's all ifs buts and maybes with me tonight! :cool:

-s-

Leigh73

Hiya folks,

Hope you are all well.

I'm sat here, feeling rather nicely stuffed after my prawn curry, rice and chips from the Chinese! My head is fuzzing up though.

Radio 4 on.. Rock and Roll :-)

My Girlfriend (of sorts - it's not been right for a while..) has just been calling (again..she's rang / texted incessantly these past few days) again this evening from the pub..

She's out with her mate, and she's half - cut. Fair enough. Her choice, but I've already asked her not to call me when she's on her way to getting blotto'd.

Where do I start guys? What on earth do I do?

"Just don't pick up that first drink...Just for today..One day at a time" blah blah blah, and all that AA malarkey..

The thing is, I haven't drank, have no intention of drinking, 'cos of the maelstrom of madness which it brings on.

However, this girl is doing my head in.

First off, she's a star, a diamond. An intelligent, kind, funny, sassy, lovely Lady.

I only met her just before last Christmas, and things have gone somewhat awry.

She's known of my issues from the offing.

Since the end of January, she's lent me around £1,500, in order to save me from losing from my flat, to keep my phone line, to eat, and to not have my electric cut off.

I love her. I'm not in love with her. I though I was, but I'm not, and obviously when you throw money into the mix, it all gets even more confusing :-/

I feel completely indebted to her. It stinks.

I've already told her that I'll repay her as soon as I can afford to, and have even offered to set up a Direct Debit for a small fortnightly amount, until I'm back in work.
That was about 6 weeks back, and she refused, saying I couldn't afford it.

Yikes. What a nightmarish situation.

She went to London on Wednesday, and the whole time she was there, she was calling / texting the whole time. Thursday night, she must've called me 10 times..the latter few times accidentally I think, again drunk.

She' asked me a few times the past couple of months, "Do you love me?" and I've not wanted to hurt her.

Today, all day, she's been calling / texting again incessantly.

Tonight, before she'd gone out, I'd invited her over tomorrow night for dinner, and all was arranged. She then calls from the pub (obviously half - p*shed) and said "I don't think this is working between us. I love you to bits. I wished I'd never got involved with you" ..quite :-/

I'd said to her that we'd talk tomorrow face to face, but that as she was getting nasty, I was hanging up - which I did.

She then calls again 4/5 times, and texting, asking me to call her back. Then she texts again, saying "You won't call me because you're avoiding the truth. I'm breaking up with you. I care about you, but I can't be with you. I'm not changing my mind."

So that's that.

I feel like I'm in a corner. I'm worried about her.

Like I said, it's dawned on me just how, I'm not 'in love' with her. I do love her.

I don't need this constant contact though :-/

She kept asking me (before she'd gone out), if I'd been drinking.

In a s*rewy sort of way, it's as if she wanted me to 'have been drinking'.

Alas, I haven't drank, and I need some space from this lady, as she's starting to freak me out.

Cheers,

Sim x

Leigh73

Talk of the devil.. she's just rang, again. I'm starting to jump now, when the phone goes!

365days

Turn the phone off. She's !!!!ed. You don't need it. Harsh but the best thing to do.

I'd google co-dependancy too.

Oh and by the way it's PBT but don't tell anyone! (SSSsh!)

Leigh73

Hi 365days,

Spot on.

Know what you mean about the whole 'co - dependancy' thing too :-/

I just feel trapped.

It's almost as if she's even using the money as 'leverage' - she mentioned it again earlier when she was drunk on the phone.

I told her we'd talk tomorrow, face to face.

Then I got a voice message, saying "I'm still dumping you" - up and down like a yo yo :-/

365days

You sound like the worst possible combination. You struggling with alcohol addiction her co-dependant.

This is abit of amateur pshycology here but I'm guessing that if you were well she wouldn't find you so interesting. Therefore to keep you 'unwell' is beneficial to her. She's not nasty just co-dependant.

I think tomorrow you have some tough talking to do but you already say you are not in love with her, so it sounds like the right time to split. The money can be sorted....later.