The giving up/cutting down alcohol thread part VI

shaggydoo

MAD (March Alcohol Detox)

Barshamhillbily - 1/TF*
Castri09 - 10/31

Decemberbaby - 1/10

fayjmck - 1/25
fedupandskint - 9/29

fruitycar - 6/22

gien - 6/21
Holliegarson - 7/20
HoneyBear - 7/20

Icandothis - 4/10

IcelandicMaiden - 2/31

Jo1972 - 3/TF*

lamarsi - 1/21

Lurkio - 4/15

Mamam - 4/10

Mollypolly - 7/31
Marru - 9/31

Mookiepook - 6/27
Paybacktime - 8/TF*

Price Is Right - 25
Shaggydoo - 9/17
Saorsie - 7/23

Shellywb - 6/23

So Sad Angel - 4/31

WannabeeFree - 4/15

115k - 3/TF*

*TF = Target Free

A Bag of gold coins when you reach 7 days


Well Done Everyone :T:T:T:T

Shaggy

shaggydoo

Lilith Lurks

jo1972

Morning, gotta be quick need to get to work early today cos of the funeral

115k, I hope your test goes okay, when are you going? xx

Marru, hope DD is okay after her fall? xx

Lilith, welcome to the thread, hope you get loads of support from the wonderful peeps on here xx


Shaggy, loving your picture this morning :rotfl:

Better go get myself ready. Have a good day everyone xx

Miss_Piggy_2

Morning all

Welcome Lilith - as others have said, this is a great thread as you will find nobody judgmental here. PBT and GC covered pretty much what I would have said. Good luck and keep posting.

PBT - you have good friends. Mine have been supportive too if I've said I'm not drinking on a night out etc. And my OH is SO supportive it makes me quite ashamed sometimes when I think about how I've made life hard for him in the past when I've been drinking.

Starting a new regime with Piglet today. His messiness and stubborness is driving me to distraction (makes him sound horrible but he's not really!). So from now on I'm not taking any more carp from him! First fight of the day.....teeth brushing....so once more into the breach dear friends....catch you all later (if I haven't been viciously impaled by a childs toothbrush!)

Miss P
xx

EDIT ((hugss) for today Jo - hope it goes ok

Pippilongstocking

Hey JO goodluck having been to the funeral on Monday - I hope it all goes OK.

Miss P goodluck - my DS was the same.................:)

Lillith - I can hear what you are saying about OH - have you talked to him about what the doctor said and perhaps say to him that the doc is so concerned about your health you need to give things a rest for a while and cut down a bit - he might then just accept that's where you are at for just now and it will seem 'normal' after a while. Although I know its hard - I think this is hard enough without trying to justify to other folks what you are doing. So if it were me I would concentrate on you for a while and see how things go - you might be pleasantly surprised by folks reactions.......

Some of my friends have been brilliant about my cutting down my drinking - others have been really hurtful - I think its because if I'm drinking they feel justified in their drinking - when folks change habits it can be a bit challenging for some people around us.

Whatever you do - you can be assured on here you can be as open and honest as you need to be - which might give you a release for all the things you are feeling. When you're more familiar with the changes you're making then you might feel you can be a bit more open with those around you. It took me a while to open up a bit to my other friends.

This lot however, are always about to listen

saorsie

Will be a big lovely #7 for me please Shaggy.

Welcome to Lileth - you sound very sorted and focused and I'm sure you'll achieve what you're looking for - we are all big drinkers in my circle however I've stuck to my guns when I've wanted to be AF and they've largely been very supportive - combined with my bloody-mindedness not to yield this has seen me through - am sure it will you too. Will look forward to sharing your journey

-s-

graemecarter

Lilith1980 wrote: »

I guess I would like to cut down really and the question is...can I do this when out with friends or will it mean I stop seeing them in order to avoid being around that much alcohol.

That's up to you - if you find you cannot be around alcohol, then it sounds like you have some quite big issues that need addressing. If it is not too bad, you may put a little distance between you and your heavy drinking friends in the early stages.

The other problem is my husband is a heavy drinker too - not everyday but cannot stop once he's started (like me).

You cannot make him stop or cut down. While it doesn't make cutting down any easier, you make the decision to drink. He is not pouring it down your neck.
He may be encouraged to slow down a bit if he sees you succeeding (that is a big MAY - it sounds like he has problems with alcohol)

I'm not going out so much anymore anyway because of my uni course (mature student, part-time) and I have been off cigarettes for 10 months, and hubby thinks I have turned boring. So I think I will keep quiet about me cutting down on the alcohol as I think he is the one more likely to give me stick.

The Doctor says that you are drinking too much and your health is at risk. Surely your husband should be supportive? If not, it says a lot about his relationship with alcohol.
You cannot take your hubby's inventory - cut down or quit for yourself and don't worry what ANYONE thinks. Your health is too important.

I don't think me making this decision is going to have a great affect on our already unstable marriage but I think well if he bases us having fun on just going out and getting leathered then how f***ed up is that anyway?

Your health is of paramount importance - if your marriage has strong fundamentals, it will survive.
Stop projecting too far and just get through today with a drink. I haven't drunk for a while now, and I take it 24 hrs at a time

Thanks for the time machine link Fay - I input my details and it says I am damaging my health and need to stop.

Listen to it - problems with alcohol rarely get better on their own accord

I think the trip to the doctors was just what I needed, like it was meant to happen. I needed someone in that profession to say to me 'you're doing damage to yourself and need to be careful'.

Exactly - it is nice to hear it from someone else. Hopefully it is the catalyst you need.

The doctor was very honest actually - he said he had been an alcoholic and had been off the drink for 15 years now. He said his liver reading had been 1000 but within 3 months of cutting out the drink it had returned to normal levels so there is hope. I was touched by his honesty.

Good for him

I'll keep coming here as this will give me the motivation

:T:T:T

One big hurdle that I can foresee is that it's my birthday in 3 weeks' time (my 30th!) so any ideas on how I can get through this?? I guess I just need to be strict and drink my drinks slowly and if people are offering to buy me one then just say I already have one? It sounds silly, but I feel that I have to hide the fact that I want to cut down rather than hiding my excessiveness.

A birthday doesn't automatically mean drunkenness. You don't HAVE to drink.

If you have to hide your cutting down from people because they'll get annoyed etc, they obviously don't have your best interests at heart

MountainOfDebt_2

I muist admit, me and the wife, I believe, have drink problems. My issues are I can go weeks without having a drink, then the wheels come off spectacularly for 3 odd days, then I am off again for 4 days, maybe a week, maybe a month, but then the cycle happens again. I go through the phases of nice mellow (2 drinks), pleasant company (2 - 6/7 drink) to total tosspot (7+) drinks. I am mean, aggressive and not a nice person to be around. Nxt day, short tempered and unapproachable. I kleep telling the wife I should stop, that it's not good for me, but she doesn't think I am, she just says we can carry on, maybe we should manage it better, then it happens all over again. She equates fun to drinking and I have told her whilst she believes this, we'll always have issues with drink. We have no hobbies (I used to, but gave up cricket when the kids were born) so, I guess, we're bored.

Thanks for letting me open up, I have not had this chance, well, not had a captive audience before that actually listens

I am trying to be AF until April 7th and then in moderation from then on. If I can't do that, I think it's time to simply walk away from it, if I can.

Miss_Piggy_2

graemecarter wrote: »

A birthday doesn't automatically mean drunkenness. You don't HAVE to drink.

Exactly! Although its taken me many years to realise that birthdays, christmas, holidays etc DON'T mean you have to drink! So far this year I've got through 2 meals out without a drink. I enjoyed the evening, the conversation, the company and the food. Surely thats what its all about? And thats what I intend to keep focussing on.

Miss P
xx

Pippilongstocking

Hey mountain of debt - hello and you've found us - captive we are - and a friendly bunch.

you seem to have been thinking alot - do you think the hobbies kinda went when the kids arrived and they've been replaced (sort of) with drinking instead.

I only ask because I've found that I've given up alot of things since the kids arrived and up until lately I've just opened a bottle of wine instead of doing something else..............I'm slowly clawing back my 'hobbies' and I feel so much better for it.