elderly relative putting herself at risk...

foreign_correspondent

Hi,

Just wondering if anyone has any experience of this sort of problem - I have an elderly relative who lives alone.
She has paranoid delusions re: the next door neighbour persecuting her etc. I believe these delusions are now affecting her in more ways, as she is also switching her storage heaters off overnight (when they need to be charging - they will give out no heat unless they have been on to charge overnight).

She has unfounded fears that they will burn the house down 'because they get hot'. She has seven storage heaters in the house, but only ever uses two of them, on low. If we put them on, she goes round the house and turns them all off as soon as we leave. She has fallen, twice, both times her house has been very cold.

She is unable to understand that the risk of hypothermia is far greater, and far more realistic than the risk of fire.
I am not at all convinced she is able to make rational decisions re: her own safety at home.

Is there anything we can do - as soon as she is left alone she will switch the heating off, and put herself in grave danger? I wondered about getting the switches altered, so she cannot switch them off, but believe this is illegal.

Bobby2

I would suggest that you speak to her Doctor at the hospital and explain the situation, he/she could then recommend the professional agencies which could be of help. Also, you could speak to Social Services (normally they have an office within the hospital) and they could device a "return to home" plan and hopefully get a home help in place. I do hope that you manage to get something in place which will put your mind at rest.

ClootiesMum

Hi F-C

Please speak to her doctor as soon as possible - if she's stubborn & think she knows her own mind then a doctor's visit after a stay in hospital woud not be unexpected (I had to become so devious & lied about things when Mum had dementia). If you can pre-warn the doctor what the problems are & then "happen" to drop in when doc is there then you can be sure that all the necessary evidence is noted.
Once I had a confirmed diagnosis for Mum then the social waded in & were horrified at how bad she was and relly pulled all the stops out- but until a diagnosis had been given their hands were tied.

I wish you the best - it's a hard position to be but you should do what you feel is right for your relative.
Take care

foreign_correspondent

Have spoken to SW, written to hospital, spoken to ward staff - still same response - nothing they can do.

ClootiesMum - do you mean her hospital doctor, or GP?

MrsE_2

foreign_correspondent wrote: »

Have spoken to SW, written to hospital, spoken to ward staff - still same response - nothing they can do.

ClootiesMum - do you mean her hospital doctor, or GP?

Who's SW - social worker?

Speak to them again, plus speak to her hospital doctor about her dementia - tell them you want her tested. Get her GP to refer you if the hospital won't.

Explain she is endangering her life.

foreign_correspondent

MrsE wrote: »

Who's SW - social worker?

Speak to them again, plus speak to her hospital doctor about her dementia - tell them you want her tested. Get her GP to refer you if the hospital won't.

Explain she is endangering her life.

Have done, they say she does not have demetia, just forgetfulness, and that her fears are not unreasonable - of course, I challenged this, (everyone in the country has their heating on if they can afford it, when it is minus five outside, sensible people do not leave the heating off in case their house catches fire!) and told them her life is in danger because of the cold.

MrsE_2

foreign_correspondent wrote: »

Have done, they say she does not have demetia, just forgetfulness, and that her fears are not unreasonable - of course, I challenged this, (everyone in the country has their heating on if they can afford it, when it is minus five outside, sensible people do not leave the heating off in case their house catches fire!) and told them her life is in danger because of the cold.

Its wrong that you are not being listened to.

Keep shouting & complaining & I truely hope someone sensible hears.

Ms_Chocaholic

Have you thought about contacting Age Concern? Not sure what help they can offer but they may be able to help

Errata

FC - I think you need to speak to her doctor if that's possible. From what you've written the lady has paranoid delusions - the neighbours and the house catching fire from the heaters, and also seems to be cognitively impaired in that she is unable to understand how to keep her house warm.
These are not necessarily dementia, although they can accompany it, but they are problems that are seen in the elderly and with goodwill on everyones's part, particularly the GP, her life can be improved.
HTH

foreign_correspondent

Thanks Errate, I will do that - she does not believe being cold will hurt her, she says she does not feel it, and will not take on board that as an elderly person, with limited mobility, that living in a very cold house is inherently risky..

Errata

You're welcome. She may not feel it like we would, older people don't which is why many of them become very ill with or die of hypothermia.

ETA - just made myself laugh. I'm an older person, but def don't feel the cold as my house is always tropical