We'd like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum... Read More »
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
Debt Free by 40 Debt Diary
Options
Comments
-
Takes a big deep breath..........
I'm back....
Everything was just too much for me and something had to give. I had my exam, AQA, home, the boss and my bank charges all screaming at me for my attention and I had to just try and fight through it all . And my diary , and this site really, was the bit that fell of the edge of what I could cope with.
I'm still feeling a bit fragile, but I've started over the last couple of days popping into the DFW board. I've seen the PM's from you guys as they have been ariving, but I couldn't bring myself to answer them, I just couldn't 'talk'. Very difficult to describe, but Ifelt guilty not answering them.
Anyway........tentative wave to everyone and a huge thankyou to those who PM'd me , even though I was incredibly rude and didn't reply. I apologise.
God, where to start.........
Ok, I'll start with the bad news.
The bad news is that i'm still battling the Abbey for both my bank charge claims. Both have had stays put on them until 31 January by the local Judge. I've put in an appeal against them both, which has cost me £70 in total and I will have to wait and see what happens.
I'm also still battling against citicards. I went to court as they didn't put in a defence on time and I got a CCJ against them. I managed to get the judge to make them pay what they owe me into the court and they have to give me a defence and also provide a breakdown of how the charges are made up. However, they have complained about this and although they have paid the money into the court, the Judge (same one as saw my Abbey paperwork) has put a stay on, until, yep 31 January. I'm in cahoots with CAG moderators at the moment to fire one back at them, but it is messy. And all for £375. They will have spent more than this on the solicitor who attended court!
I've managed, somehow to put a couple of hundred back on my credit card. The lowest APR one, but still it signifies a significant bit of 'leakage'.
My car is very very poorly. It broke down scarily on Friday when it just started to cut out on every corner and the power steering locked each time. Not good half way round a roundabout. Time to replace it as the MOT is due in 2 weeks and the exhaust sounds like a big old rumbling motorbike.
spent the weekend arguing with my OH. He just never thinks of me and how I'm feeling. He felt my car was 'driveable' and that I would have to 'cope with it'. He just never proactively thinks 'oh, I'll cheer up O_M with a bottle of wine, or a bar of chocolate'. He arrives, eats, sleeps, leaves.
The boss is still being a horrid bully, but apparently her reputation is slowly spreading and there are comments of 'does she really know what she is doing' and 'isn't she rude' slowly being reported back to me.
Went over my o/d limit by a few pounds and am going to be charged for it next month. Guess I'll have to start another claim!!
Budgeting has gone a bit out of the window. I've bought myself a new jumper and stupidly a bottle of perfume. I could argue that I don't have any jumpers so it was necesaary, but I don't think I can say the same about the bottle of perfume......whoops......
think that is all the bad news.
Now, the good news.
I fixed my car for free!!!! I spent yesterday reading the Vauxhall Owners forum and discovered it was a diagnostic fault. It is possible to do a diagnositc test on older vauxhalls with a paperclip - I kid you not!!!!!
This showed the problem and a bit of advice from the forum later, a few squirts of WD40 on a removed part (done by the OH so he isn't all bad) and I'm back on the road!!!! Saved about £80!
I've had my Capital One charges returned. I banked the cheque and as soon as it cleared, I whacked it off my CC's.
I did my exam! And, I think the 3 weeks of 3 hours a day was fruitful. I came out thinking I had probably done enough to pass. I am hopeful to be honest.
Erm.....what else...
ooh, yes. News today. Got news of my backdated payrise that i've been waiting for. They ARE going to pay me back to October 2004!!!!! This means from the end of November, I will clear another £110 a month and then in January/February time, I will get about £1700 after tax as an extra lump sum!!! Fab news as it looked like I would only get the monthly increase.
hhhhhhhmmmmmmmm.........don't think there is anything else.....
No.....there isn't......
oooh, AQA.......earned £650 last month and again chucked it straight at the debts.
Have done £400 this month. not going to kill myself anymore today or tomorrow just to add £20 or so. Not so much earnt but I had to virtually drop it for the first 13 days of the month to revise. And after that Iwas completely exhausted. It all just got too much.
I realised that as my plan is place, I can't keep hammering myself to get more and more and more done and end up killing myself mentally. If I've 'only' done £400 on AQA this month, so what?? It pays off the CC i've run stuff up on over the last 2 months and it has put me behind on my masterplan by a month, but it is a lesson learnt and not much damage done.
anyway, oh dear, bit of a ramble.........sorry.........0 -
Hello lovee
Funnily enough I was going to search out this thread today to see how you were doing but you beat me to it!I applied (and got accepted) for AQA because I'd read about them on here so I just wanted to say a little thank you for putting the idea into my head.
Massive kudos for fixing the car by yourself - I am WELL impressed :T. Sorry to hear that you are still suffering at the hands of your witch of a boss though, she sounds horrific - but it looks like things may be slowing turning on her at last. As for your OH..........he doesn't deserve you, you do know that don't you?0 -
oakdale_minx wrote:Takes a big deep breath..........
I'm back....
Hurray!oakdale_minx wrote:Everything was just too much for me and something had to give. I had my exam, AQA, home, the boss and my bank charges all screaming at me for my attention and I had to just try and fight through it all . And my diary , and this site really, was the bit that fell of the edge of what I could cope with.
To be frank - that was the wisest choice.oakdale_minx wrote:I'm still feeling a bit fragile, but I've started over the last couple of days popping into the DFW board. I've seen the PM's from you guys as they have been ariving, but I couldn't bring myself to answer them, I just couldn't 'talk'. Very difficult to describe, but Ifelt guilty not answering them.
Don't feel guilty. And if you do answer them little short messages like "I'm OK" are perfectly fine. People just want responses to show you're alive, not War and Peace.oakdale_minx wrote:spent the weekend arguing with my OH. He just never thinks of me and how I'm feeling. He felt my car was 'driveable' and that I would have to 'cope with it'.
Does he have a car? His is yours and yours is his. Cars that cut out are not drivable. I've had a car cut out at 80 before. That's an experience.oakdale_minx wrote:He just never proactively thinks 'oh, I'll cheer up O_M with a bottle of wine, or a bar of chocolate'. He arrives, eats, sleeps, leaves.
Flowers are less fattening. Doing all the housework for you is even better.oakdale_minx wrote:Went over my o/d limit by a few pounds and am going to be charged for it next month. Guess I'll have to start another claim!!
Or you could try phoning them and getting them to waive them. Saves you the hassle.oakdale_minx wrote:I did my exam! And, I think the 3 weeks of 3 hours a day was fruitful. I came out thinking I had probably done enough to pass. I am hopeful to be honest.
I'm smelling modesty here...oakdale_minx wrote:ooh, yes. News today. Got news of my backdated payrise that i've been waiting for. They ARE going to pay me back to October 2004!!!!!
That's really excellent news.oakdale_minx wrote:oooh, AQA.......earned £650 last month and again chucked it straight at the debts.
Have done £400 this month. not going to kill myself anymore today or tomorrow just to add £20 or so. Not so much earnt but I had to virtually drop it for the first 13 days of the month to revise. And after that Iwas completely exhausted. It all just got too much.
Yes. Be careful with AQA. It's tempting to do more and more, but you need "you" time as well. Time to rest and recuperate.oakdale_minx wrote:anyway, oh dear, bit of a ramble.........sorry.........
Better a ramble than a deadening silence.
Welcome back."Follow the money!" - Deepthroat (AKA William Mark Felt Sr - Associate Director of the FBI)
"We were born and raised in a summer haze." Adele 'Someone like you.'
"Blowing your mind, 'cause you know what you'll find, when you're looking for things in the sky." OMD 'Julia's Song'0 -
Hi OM! Missed you!!!!
So, bank charges will take a bit longer and OH is still a [EMAIL="pl@nker"]pl@nker[/EMAIL].... but apart from that you've passed your exam (stop being so modest!), added car maintenance to your many skills, earnt loads from AQA, getting loads of dosh from work and gave yourself a well earned rest & well earned bottle of perfume.
So what about a little on the credit card, your back pay will clear that, give yourself a break hon. As you are beginning to realise, something has to give a little.
Good to see you back!!!!:jA positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effortMortgage Balance = £0
"Do what others won't early in life so you can do what others can't later in life"0 -
Hi there, so glad you're back. :j :T :j :T :j
I was wondering again today where you were and hoping you were feeling OK.
Lots of good news there as well as some not so good.
You sound like an amazing gf and you deserve an equally amazing bf.:A
Perhaps a little more of you putting your needs first would help?:DCCs @0% £24k Dec 05 £19,621.41 Au £13400 S 12600 Oct £11,981 £9481 £7500 Nov £7250 D £7100 Jan 6950 F £5800 Mar£5400 May £4830 June £4660 July £4460 Aug £3200, S £900, £0 18/9/07 DFW Nerd 0420 -
Thankyou for all the kind messages. Glad i'm (almost) back to normal. Still feel like there is a man running round my head waving his hands and screaming all the time, but maybe he's moved in for a while yet!
Pay day today. Paid the minimum payment on everything. Will wait to see what happens with the car in its MOT to see where my £400 from AQA goes this month. It will either go partly on fixing the car, partly on paying extra off the CC or all towards a replacement car if the MOT is a disaster.
Car insurance due on the 2nd. I'm paying £30 a month at the moment. Cheapest quote is with Budget and will be £20 a month. I go to 3 years no claims this year. It's been a long haul from having no claims in my own name after splitting with the ex. If I do change car, I guess I could save more - an Escort will be £18 a month fully comp.
Declined the department Xmas party today. Mixture of because the dragon is going, because all the other people going are very very dull and because it is £26 plus drinks. It is a sit down Chinese and although it's a fab restaurant, i'm not paying £26 for a chinese.
Bah humbug! To be honest, not even bothered. Me plus three people from work are going to go to a different chinese at some point in December. £10.80 a head , eat all you want. We've been there a few times and the food and atmosphere is just as good as the £26 a head place.
Need to do a budget for the month. Paid the minimum payment on everything but the rest of the budgeting is a black hole. Need to buy some contact lenses which is £32 today and I ahd a bit of the 'quick, pay the bills whilst the money is there' sensation today, which was silly as I know there is more than enough for everything. Still need to do one though to see how much money is left for the month.0 -
Remember to do Budget via quidco - £25 cashback!!!A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort
Mortgage Balance = £0
"Do what others won't early in life so you can do what others can't later in life"0 -
quidco is £25??!! Excellent, was going to do it through greasypalm, but that is only £12 I think.
Good excuse to get myself organised to sign up to quidco. I've exhausted all the freebies with greasypalm although I do have £25 coming to me, hopefully on the next cheque run.0 -
YOU MEAN TO SAY YOU'VE NOT SIGNED UP TO QUIDCO!!!!!!!
You bad, bad person!!!! Get on there NOW!!!!!!! Quick tip - you need to have cookies enabled etc. Best to try a search on Kelkoo or similar 1st - make sure your 10p tracks, then do Budget, don't want to lose the £25 because it doesn't track!!!
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effortMortgage Balance = £0
"Do what others won't early in life so you can do what others can't later in life"0 -
WOW is all I can say. You are truly a strong person, done tremendously well handling your debt like you have.I :heart2: saving money0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply

Categories
- All Categories
- 351.1K Banking & Borrowing
- 253.2K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 453.6K Spending & Discounts
- 244.1K Work, Benefits & Business
- 599.1K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 177K Life & Family
- 257.5K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.1K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.6K Read-Only Boards