depression

Miroslav

elona wrote:

Milo

You have a fantastic turn of phrase - "like a trout with piles" had me laughing my socks off.

Sounds like "S" is desperate not to be "pitied" so she puts a good gloss on things and is scared of someone seeing "the real her" because she feels she is not good enough.

Paradoxically, the nicer and more thoughtful that you are, the more she will feel that she does not deserve you.

The very best of luck.

Well, I try

Crazy thing is, I think 'S' is too good for me. She's pretty, funny, sweet, vulnerable and i'm..............me :rolleyes: I just like her for her...........it will never go anywhere, and it does hurt alot, but what hope is there....

As i'm sure you'd expect, i'm not gonna be horrible to her, to satisfy her own self opinion. I'll continue to be nice, albeit very nervous, around her.

I just want the 'S' of Thursday 19th October back again..............but I think she is long gone. She no longer wants to know about my worries, yet she's happy to project hers. It seems my pain is no longer important.

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

Tonight wasn't as good at the music, as last night.

Sorted out my lyrics etc, but then we were thrown totally, as we had to choose 4 from the 9 put forward to work in groups and learn them.

I didn't put my lyrics forward, as they were personal to me, so 3 of us were put in 1 group, and 2 of us have very little musical 'talent' so the other guy was getting a tad annoyed with us :rolleyes:

All sounds what they're trying to is quite ambitious for newcomers? To my way of thinking anyway. I'd feel reluctant to put my lyrics forward if they were a bit personal. But still, reckon it might have been a worthwhile experience for you?

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

Well, I try

Crazy thing is, I think 'S' is too good for me. She's pretty, funny, sweet, vulnerable and i'm..............me :rolleyes: I just like her for her...........it will never go anywhere, and it does hurt alot, but what hope is there....

As i'm sure you'd expect, i'm not gonna be horrible to her, to satisfy her own self opinion. I'll continue to be nice, albeit very nervous, around her.

I just want the 'S' of Thursday 19th October back again..............but I think she is long gone. She no longer wants to know about my worries, yet she's happy to project hers. It seems my pain is no longer important.

Miro I'm sure that's not true - probably her own pain is in the foreground too much at the mo'... not saying you're pain is any less, it isn't, but sounds like you're the stronger of the two... it ain't fair i know

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

All sounds what they're trying to is quite ambitious for newcomers? To my way of thinking anyway. I'd feel reluctant to put my lyrics forward if they were a bit personal. But still, reckon it might have been a worthwhile experience for you?

Well, mixing us newbies and experienced together was a bad idea, although the guys running it still want me to do my own thing. Will have a play and forward my idea(s) I might make it not about Britney, more to do with 'S' now I don't have a title to stick too.

I need to do it about 'S' really, because I am utterly depressed again now. Can't get her out of my head.

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

Miro I'm sure that's not true - probably her own pain is in the foreground too much at the mo'... not saying you're pain is any less, it isn't, but sounds like you're the stronger of the two... it ain't fair i know

I know, it's just really hard. I don't know why, but when she came around on Sunday, I felt awkward and unable to enjoy myself with her, even though she was laughing

I knew she was hiding pain, exaggerating everything, pretending she had loads of friends, when I know it's not true, and it hurt........odd maybe to some, but I just couldn't let my hair down

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

Well, mixing us newbies and experienced together was a bad idea, although the guys running it still want me to do my own thing. Will have a play and forward my idea(s) I might make it not about Britney, more to do with 'S' now I don't have a title to stick too.

I need to do it about 'S' really, because I am utterly depressed again now. Can't get her out of my head.

Well they must reckon you've got strong ideas that are worth going with? Hun I have to crash very soon if I'm going to function at work tomorrow... :rolleyes: Please don't get too depressed - maybe rewriting your lyrics for 'S' might help you deal with your feelings? x

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

Well they must reckon you've got strong ideas that are worth going with? Hun I have to crash very soon if I'm going to function at work tomorrow... :rolleyes: Please don't get too depressed - maybe rewriting your lyrics for 'S' might help you deal with your feelings? x

They haven't seen my lyrics as wasn't happy with them in the end.

I will see if writing about 'S' helps, it's from the heart, but must be careful, as flatmate is part of the group. I'm depressed, but it's more to do with me worrying about her. She's gonna end up with a bloke who uses her, and pretty soon, when it should be me with her. I don't mean i'm in love...........something is there, but I just wanna look after her and prove to her I care, but her being distant and non interested right now, isn't helping things

Have a nice 'crash', hope all is well as can be in Sazbo land, and you've lost no more rucksacks

Sazbo

Miroslav wrote:

They haven't seen my lyrics as wasn't happy with them in the end.

I will see if writing about 'S' helps, it's from the heart, but must be careful, as flatmate is part of the group. I'm depressed, but it's more to do with me worrying about her. She's gonna end up with a bloke who uses her, and pretty soon, when it should be me with her. I don't mean i'm in love...........something is there, but I just wanna look after her and prove to her I care, but her being distant and non interested right now, isn't helping things

Have a nice 'crash', hope all is well as can be in Sazbo land, and you've lost no more rucksacks

Maybe that's just the impression she's giving you at the moment? Like a self-protection thing?

LOL! Went to pick up my rucksack this morning from Lost Property and would you believe it, managed to get it home without leaving it on the train tonight Sazbo land is, well, needin' to crash, as per usual. So I shall bid you and all the good folk here a very good night and sweet dreams. Much love, Sxxx

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

Maybe that's just the impression she's giving you at the moment? Like a self-protection thing?

LOL! Went to pick up my rucksack this morning from Lost Property and would you believe it, managed to get it home without leaving it on the train tonight Sazbo land is, well, needin' to crash, as per usual. So I shall bid you and all the good folk here a very good night and sweet dreams. Much love, Sxxx

I don't know, i'm totally confused. Most people would give up, but i'm not normal. I really do think she doesn't like me very much now, i'm banging my head against a brick wall

Wahey! Well done!

Have a good night, catch you again soon

I'm seeing a lady tomorrow, who may be able to help with my current fears. Met her before, and she's wanting to see me to see if she can help me in any way. She's the mental health leader at my local college and has loads of contacts.......

I've told her i'm paying, she says she will fight me for the honour.......it's okay for her to do that, but with 'S' I don't like it.

Ignore me, I'm odd :rolleyes:

Catch you soon Sazbo

Hope everyone else is okay tonight

Horasio

feelinggood wrote:

Hey guys
I'm happy today

That is great, sorry I wasn't around earlier. Been a busy evening:)

The car is lovely.

I feel very happy with my husband and have done since last Friday night.

Our son, on the other hand, is a complete a/hole and really upset me today. I was in tears by the time we got to our husband's workplace. He had the heating on in the car very high and it made me feel sick, he didn't care and I had to open the window and he kept moaning and putting the heating up higher. He will make such a great husband to someone - NOT!

My husband gave him what for, without shouting and looked after me.

I am trying to be MS but our son leaves the heating on high in his room, blames me for having his cold for not having the heating on but he is hardly here. Leaves his TV on standby when he goes away. His bathroom is disgraceful and everything is dirty. I refuse to clean his midden. I really want him to go, if he doesn't, I will!