depression

avocadomummy

very close to the children = although distancing myself at the moment as Ifeel I am "bringing them down". they are 13, 11 andl 8. I am not a single parent - although husband is away a lot and also is not interested in me anymore - can't cope with my depression and says he doesn't even love me when I'm well. Don't have too many options because of finances. Pretty sad really - don't know what to do - dr prescribed mirtazapam (max dose) but doesn't seem to have worked yet (about 5 weeks)

rose07

Sazbo wrote:

Aww good to have you back hun. We missed you. But I feel reassured to know that Tiff's been on your case as well as mine - she has a good heart. Hope you've got something nice planned for what's left of the weekend. (((hugs))) Saz x

good to be back hun, have missed you all too. xxxxxx arh its nice to be missed.
yeah tiff has been on me case a bit, ya know how she is, good to have that, i need a good kick up the a** every now and again, lol. thanks tiff huni. now get your a** on here. or i will be on your case. She does have a heart of gold.
im going to chill, chill, and spend time with my baby. thats if my mum dont stress me out. lol
what about you hun, what you been up to this week?
:grouphug:
xxx

Sazbo

avocadomummy wrote:

very close to the children = although distancing myself at the moment as Ifeel I am "bringing them down". they are 13, 11 andl 8. I am not a single parent - although husband is away a lot and also is not interested in me anymore - can't cope with my depression and says he doesn't even love me when I'm well. Don't have too many options because of finances. Pretty sad really - don't know what to do - dr prescribed mirtazapam (max dose) but doesn't seem to have worked yet (about 5 weeks)

A pity yr husband isn't more supportive. Unfortunately a fairly common situation though with a difficult condition like depression. We aren't allowed to give advice on here, but probably best you get medication sorted out with doctor before anything else. Take care.

rose07

avocadomummy wrote:

very close to the children = although distancing myself at the moment as Ifeel I am "bringing them down". they are 13, 11 andl 8. I am not a single parent - although husband is away a lot and also is not interested in me anymore - can't cope with my depression and says he doesn't even love me when I'm well. Don't have too many options because of finances. Pretty sad really - don't know what to do - dr prescribed mirtazapam (max dose) but doesn't seem to have worked yet (about 5 weeks)

yeah as saz says kids can be fairly resilient, try not to distance yourself too much from them. and your kids are old enough to understand if you talk to them, this is the one thing my mum wont do, just let them know whats going on.
your OH doesnt sound like he is being very supportive of you at the mo, which means you are left to deal with things yourself, well we are here to help anyway we can, we cant fix things but we can listen.
xxx

Sazbo

rose07 wrote:

good to be back hun, have missed you all too. xxxxxx arh its nice to be missed.
yeah tiff has been on me case a bit, ya know how she is, good to have that, i need a good kick up the a** every now and again, lol. thanks tiff huni. now get your a** on here. or i will be on your case. She does have a heart of gold.
im going to chill, chill, and spend time with my baby. thats if my mum dont stress me out. lol
what about you hun, what you been up to this week?
:grouphug:
xxx

Nothing too exciting, just work really. Have a caught flipping cold though and it's making me feel carp, so just gonna take it easy tomorrow xx

rose07

Hi Tiff
How are you?
What you been up to this week? (don’t even think about dodging this question.);)
Well me not too great but getting there
My session with my councellor was very intense and emotional on Thursday, we spoke about some childhood things, I felt a sinking feeling inside me, feeling ashamed and trapped. She asked me if I ever self harmed I aint one to lie so I told her yes, then she began to ask questions, I didn’t know what to say as its not something I like to talk about, when I was a kid I did it a lot, everything I said she seemed concerned.
She did a bit of taking animals as representing people that I was talking about and asked me to say what the animals represented, I choose an elephant, a giraffe, a cat, a puppy dog, and a hamster. I was quite upset when I left, but I got back into work and my boss and my manager were sitting at the computer and called me over to help them with the software, I sat in the middle and felt protected and ok, they made me laugh, and cheered me up and I showed them how to use the software (as they had no idea), and I felt proud and happy, and like I do have a use.
But YES I have made it through this week, thanks to you and everyone here who has shown their support to me, I really appreciate it.
As I say it really helps having this community. xxx;)
Well I did as you said tiff…. Today I had my first driving lesson in four months (I stopped after I finished uni), it was great and did wonders for my confidence. Then afterwards I went into town, and bought some choccies for my parents coz they may do me head in but I love them soo. Some treats for the baby. And some slippers and socks for me, the slippers are lovely very lush. Oh and I also bought some skittles tiff.
I have had a manic week with one thing and another but in one piece and im going to chill tonight hopefully if mum doesn’t have a go at me.
I am sure my mood will change by tomorrow but for now I am just ok.

Oh by the way does anyone here know anything about savings accounts?

And tiff you still got that info on guided meditation? Could do with a relax this weekend, I know you a busy tiff so just when you got the time:)

And ECT anyone know anything bout this? and other kinds of these kinda things?

Much love to you
And remember if you don’t tell me about your week I will get me slippers, (the ones I got today are soo sweet they have a dog on them that barks so I will have him barking at you and biting your bum :rotfl: ).

Take care
xxxx

rose07

Sazbo wrote:

Nothing too exciting, just work really. Have a caught flipping cold though and it's making me feel carp, so just gonna take it easy tomorrow xx

Aww soz you got a cold (((((((((BIG HUGs)))))))))

i seen you have been busy here, just want you to know i appreciate all your advice and input on this thread. you a great part of things. but remember to keep us up to date with how you are and your progress

xxx

Miroslav

rose07 wrote:

Miroslav
Well first off WOW, you have had an uppy downy time of it with S texting when not sure about it, and not knowing that she wasn’t going to the funeral, but you did the right thing in texting, it would have been nice for her to know you are there for her.
I hope your first councelling session went ok, mine was pretty bad this week, very emotional.
Well done on giving her a ring, you doing well, and is your flat mate very close to S, as she could be trying to just be there for her too, must be hard on you tho as it can leave you there kinda hanging, wondering whats being said and things.

Take care, and things always have a way of finding there way through things, if its meant to be it will be.
xxx

It's been great since Thursday, I mean, WOW, an amazing time, 'S' is amazing.

Counselling was okay, was really just an assessment.

Wouldn't say flatmate was close, but they are good friends. They never say anything about me that they don't tell me.

Scared about tomorrow, but very excited.

Hope you are well, been wondering where you have been!

Miroslav

avocadomummy wrote:

Hello everybody
I am a new poster - it took me ages to work out just how to log in and actually communicate rather than just lurk. I have been suffering from depression for about four months each year over the past six years - really debilitating and awful for my children to have to live through - though they have been really good: this was not how it was supposed to be - I should have given them a really good life. I hope they will one day forget all this and not be prone to depression themselves. Does anyone know whether this can be "learned" or is it hardwired into someone's personality - or what?

Welcome along. :wave:

I'm sure your kids will understand, the older they get. It's not like you mis-treat them.

Best of wishes

Sazbo

rose07 wrote:

Aww soz you got a cold (((((((((BIG HUGs)))))))))

i seen you have been busy here, just want you to know i appreciate all your advice and input on this thread. you a great part of things. but remember to keep us up to date with how you are and your progress

xxx

- I will do, definitely. Sounds like it's been a largely positive week for you this week though, hun, and I'm glad about that. xx