little_h's big dreams :)

little_h_2

thank you I have gradually got better at being alone over the last few months. my harp teacher has been through similar marriage/relationship issues and is a great advisor/mentor. she told me that i really need to get comfy at being on my own before i thought about another relationship.

i relish it now! my pleasures are simple and cheap as i know the strength i get from being around friends and family, even if it doesn't happen as much as i would like.

my challenge for 2011 is to get myself back out there and i have had a few ideas for how to do this, need to do some finding out before i commit to anything as i have a lot on already with work, harp, teaching and brownies.

today has not been the productive day that yesterday was, but not stressing about that, i did lots yesterday!

i got boots and jeans. boots were £50 from (yikes) brantano - not a shop i normally go in as ours is scary normally. but it was v quiet today!

i also went into Matalan as i like their home stuff and came out with an embarrassingly big bag of clothes! tried on most of it, got a couple of bits to try at home and then look at with the rest of my wardrobe over the weekend to work out what to keep and what to return. I was surprised by their jeans - fitted well and ultra cheap! so much better than new look ones.

while i was there i saw a lovely huge photo collage frame which would go fantastically over my desk. it is £35 and i have just been given £50 by my granny for christmas. since i started the debt free adventure, i decided that present money was for nice things and not to be used on debt. i normally use it for clothes as i don't spend much otherwise. so i think i will use the granny money for the collage frame, and hopefully it will be a nice positive cheery thing to look at when i am working.

off to walk the hound and then do some shred. then a G n T :beer: and Vic and Bob later! before the 5.30 start tomorrow. YUK! :mad: still it will be a nice day at work tomorrow, just the two of us in and the girl who will be in is very chatty and nice to spend time with

Shoe_Gal

Sounds like a fab day

mineallmine

Good idea to spend present money like that. You must let your nan know too, she'll be chuffed.

Thanks for the compliment about the idea. It's a small amount but when you are snowballing debt (an MSE term I love) every little really does help. I'd ring Virgin first and say I'm reviewing my finances and before I look at other providers can you confirm if you are able to offer a better deal? Worst scenario, they say no. Best, you get a better deal with no transfer fees and stuff. Or you could write to them. Whatever you prefer.

Then I'd look at your overdraft APR/interest rate and see what you can do there or prioritise it if really high. I instructed my bank to deliberately reduce my od limit so I could not be tempted. Plus the lower your credit limits with all these providers the better - as the overall amount of possible debt is smaller too.

Shoe_Gal

Here's to a fabulous 2011! :j

Happy New Year!

little_h_2

mineallmine - the overdraft rate is 16.9% but the first £250 is interest free. I am only in it for about the last week of the month so it's not toooo bad. I am determined to reduce it, as at the moment this is the only facility I have if I need an extra £20 or so!

Thanks for the reminder to reduce limits too - I will be applying for a new card when the Mint balance runs out in February, so lowering my card limits can only help this. It feels odd thinking about lowering them. Silly really, I rang the Mint helpline the other day to check the date the BT ended and it told me I had like another £9000 I could spend on the card.

Ridiculous! At one point I had about £60k of available credit, on a salary of £30k ish - back in the days when credit was easy and being thrown at me! all my adult life it has been easy and normal as most of my friends had the same attitude to money as i did. I added it up now, it's £35,500 which is still far too much and more than i need.

my ex hubby hated debt which caused problems between us, he was very much a saver who was never happier than pottering at home or in the shed. small wonder that a few years into the relationship, i went pop and had to get out. I do wonder now if maybe we had had a slightly better balance of saving/spending, rather than him wanting it all to be sensible and saving for the future and me spending becuase i wanted things now, whether the marriage would have lasted. who knows

the important thing now is that i am happy as i am. it has taken a long time to say that the debt (and a few other things in life!) get me down a little, but they are under control and overall, all things considered, I am a very lucky girl

this is my last post this year! I am heading back later for nice food, nice drinks and tv. I love to spend new year alone, I plan what I want from the new year, think about the things that happened in the old year, and then settle in with uncle Jools to see in the new year will do a tarot reading tomorrow (possibly sunday if the hangover is a bad'un but it shouldn't be!) to see what things are on my mind that i haven't acknowledged yet!

and hopefully off to see my granny on sunday now she is out of hospital.

Happy New Year everyone, hope it brings you nothing but good things :j

Wordsmith

Happy New Year, little_h! May it be a good one - I'm sure it will be, with the attitude you are going into it with. Everyone I know who is single sometimes longs for a partner, and everyone in a partnership sometimes longs for time on their own. So, enjoy being single while you are, and know that someone will come along for you when the time is right (which is not a time that you need to determine, so relax on that!). [Me, I love being single. As long as I have a dog, I am content.] It's great to hear you say you are happy as you are - far too many people don't allow themselves to be happy and even if they are they are too scared to say so. You're brill.

I hope your evening of reflection will bring you much positivity - don't dwell on the sad bits of this year, just give yourself a little time to mourn them and then move on to the happy, strength-giving bits. I firmly believe that things happen for a reason, even if we can't see what that reason is at the time.

I'm glad your granny is back home - enjoy your visit with her.

Upward and onward in 2011!

Shoe_Gal

Fab post :T

I, too, am a (mostly) happy single lady

little_h_2

Morning everyone, Happy new year to you all!

I hope 2011 brings everyone wonderful things, and helps us on our way to a debt free financially sorted future! :beer:

I had a lovely new year's eve. I ended up going to stay with a very dear friend, we had nice dinner, quick drink with some other friends, and drank an awful lot of wine! :beer: oh and then we went a late night expedition round his parents farm just to see if we could manage it without falling over :rotfl: he did, I didn't the problem was, we laughed so hard I couldn't get up and he couldn't pull me up! We had a bit of a thing going on a few years ago but there are no complications now and we just enjoy each other's company which is a lovely feeling we talked lots about what we wanted from life and the new year, and as a start to my new life, it was perfect.

yesterday after a very long lie in, and a frankly epic breakfast, i was ready for the drive back home. I watched Harry Potter, cooked proper, sensible portion sized dinner for the first time in over a week :eek:, then did some shred and had a shower. Eastenders was miserable, I gave it up a few years ago when Little Mo got raped again and I think its time to knock it on the head again now. This will save me some time! Can never give up Corrie though :rotfl:

today I was planning to see my granny again but she has had another fall so just waiting to see what is going on and whether she is back home or in hospital. she is a couple of hours drive away (like most people i know *rolls eyes*) so it's not so easy to just pitch up on the off chance. I hope she is OK, I plan to go next weekend instead. It's very difficult, she is my dad's mum and my mum has a very difficult relationship with her. When I express any caring/concern for my gran, it really upsets my mum (won't go into it but a lot has gone on) so it's tricky. But she is my gran, she is old and lonely and I feel sad for her. Plus we have a good giggle when I see her and it's a lift for both of us!

so instead I will be tidying up - first stop the wardrobe so I can take the Matalan stuff back. Plus I desperately need a new bed sheet and I have heard good reports of the Matalan egyptian cotton ones from Kirstie Allsopp of all people

I might risk Brantano/JJB again to get some new trainers (I will be returning about half of what i bought from Matalan so can stretch to some trainers!) as while mine survived a chewing from a greyhound, a late night walk around a Kent farm has really finished them off and they will never be white again! :rotfl:

today's other job is my tarot reading but this will be later this evening when I am relaxed and ready for bed. I'm not very good yet but they help me think about things in a different way and I always find doing a reading to be very helpful.

i have rambled too long. hope everyone is well and that the new year has started well for you all

little_h_2

well, bit slower than expected today as i had a blinding headache about lunchtime probably all the recent alcohol catching up with me!

so took it steady, but still managed trip to Matalan etc. I took 2 pairs of jeans and a frock back. Got lovely trainers for £20 (half price)

went to the supermarket on the way home and managed to only buy bread and a paper :eek: with all my christmas food in the freezer, and a few meals frozen, i should be fine until the next c/c statement date (10th of the month - I use my JL card for food and petrol and any other planned spending as the vouchers are nice to save for xmas or other nice things!)

i have done a load of washing and also some long overdue handwashing too. plus decluttered the console table in the hallway :eek: :eek: :eek: - this is what flylady would politely refer to as a hotspot. it's my very hottest of hot spots :mad: - i need to think of a better way of managing it. but now it looks lovely, it has christmas cards, a fab bunch of christmassy flowers from my ex hubby and his new partner, and a nice bowl which i hope to use to collect letters etc.

i didn't do anything on the wardrobe front (other than clear out a couple of empty coathangers) but will do this in the morning tomorrow so i can take things to the charity box at the tip - i need to go anyway as all my tip stuff is in the car boot (one of the coping strategies for last minute house viewings!)

tomorrow's jobs - tidy desk. tidy car out (dreading this!). ironing. edging in the spare room. stay calm and enjoy the last day of my holiday without thinking about work too much :rotfl:

thrifty_fifty

Happy New Year!!

Wow Sounds like you've been busy.

I might have to come and kidnap you to clean my house. Here's hoping the headache disappears soon.

xx