Sallyx's Sink or Swim, Swimerdy Swim Diary ;)

Wannabefree_2

Thats good news (i think!) Sal. Hugs xx

beanielou

Phew what a relief.
Huggles hun xx

sallyx

Just trying to work out money :eek: what a nightmare, don't know if Im coming or going!

Ames

Great news about the job, hopefully things can start moving on now for all of you.

Make sure you check out entitled to and your council benefit calculators (should be on their website). I'm sure you'll be fine, you've managed so long on next to nothing, and without the lump you'll be spending less. And don't forget that from April any maintenance doesn't affect your benefits.

hypno06

For what its worth, I worried about how on earth I was going to manage - I was losing a whole salary's worth of contribution into the household when OH left.

But since he has gone, I have been far more focused on things, and everything has reduced and balanced out far more than I expected, meaning that while I am not rich, I am not struggling in the way I perhaps expected.

For example, it is easier to make sure the lights are switched off when no one is in the room.....my food bill has gone down significantly......not just because there is one less to feed, but because we are happy making do with jam sandwiches for lunch, whereas he would expect ham or cheese etc.....and the petrol bill is very different, because I don't have a problem getting the bus to work etc.

So, although you think it will be tough, financially, I don't think you will find it much different, and in fact you may find it a whole lot easier in the future than you have up til now, because you are in control and you only have yourself to answer to or to justify things to.

sallyx

Hypno, Im pretty sure I will be better off in the long term as my benefits won't change, bills will go down, food will be less, petrol will be less, and do pretty much as you have done. Its the next month that will be really hard scraping the money together to pay for OH's new place (months rent and months deposit). Im hoping and going to suggest that he asks his sister for the money and pay her back once he gets paid end April.

sammy115

Sally, sally, sally.... I want to shake you in a nice way....:grouphug:

Is he putting any effort into wondering how he might pay for the rent and stuff.....even if you 'scrape' it together can he pay you back. Also have you asked him to contribute to B's upkeep out of his money.

I just feel like you are doing all the sorting out here....

sallyx

I am doing all the sorting out...nothing new there Sammy!

I have just said to him we need to sit down and work out money for now and moving forward. I should be entitled to £150 a month maintenance, but I expect I will have to go without that for the first month.

He has a big shock coming to him when he has to do everything for himself!

sammy115

When me and my first OH split up I got £15 per week and that was for 2 kids...it stayed like that till they were 16. He never spent another penny on them.....it did one thing for me and it forced me to go out and earn money for myself. You are already used to providing solely for B so I don't doubt you will manage, whatever he decides to give you.

Although I wish he was making it slightly easier for you now I understand why you are doing it. :grouphug:

sallyx

He just plays the martar card...I had presumed he would take his motorbike to get there and back and keep cost of travelling down. Knew he would need tax and insurance (which he can pay monthly) and then he said oh it needs an MOT too I think. Just announced that yes it does and I asked him what the plan was then...grump grump well I'll have to see about money and if not will have a long walk from norwich to thetford. Like he would possibly walk it, its 30 mins at least in the car. I will not get sucked into sorting things for him...about time he did this for himself! I shall transfer some money and leave it to him