homemade presents and ungrateful family!!

LegalBlonde

Hi Lolly have read the whole thread, I can't understand him saying he didn't want to make you feel bad, unless it was his OH that made him mention it to you in the 1st place!!! I tried all homemade gifts etc last year and although no one said anything like that to me there was the odd passive comment or repeated words throughout the year (there are alot of women in my family!) I just put it down to their lightbulbs not going off yet and I just got them something small and cheap this year.......it is funny to see something in a manufactured box with less thought and less money and time spent on it make people happy! On the "worst presents" thread there are plenty of people who obviously keep quiet when they get what they think are rubbish presents or weird/cheap/used presents from old relatives so he should just have stayed quiet!!!

tinksy

not read the whole topic yet but you are right to be mad!! i love making hampers and mine were all greatly received!!

We made my grandparents a foodie hamper with unusual pickles/jams/chutneys in etc. This is something we do every year so they know its coming but they are well off and can buy what they want so this they love. Cost us about £20. My grandads son and DIL sent up a hamper from lakelands that cost prob 3-4 times more than ours and was top class food and guess what they liked ours more! it was chosen with thought where as they just picked the one that cost the most!!!

This year im planning to make my own jams and chutneys for the first time and people are already looking forward!!

Fave reaction was from my sister who wasnt happy when i said she was getting a joint present with her other half but i made them a night in hamper and she was over the moon!! xx

Ches

HellsGranny wrote: »

Something I have noticed here in Britain is that most folk have bought into the 'plastic fantastic' dream, and the commercialisation. In the States its the opposite, folk adore getting crafted items, and will pay good prices for them.

Here I have noticed at Craft Fairs, people being very patronising about the prices of handmade items which have cost time, effort and expense on raw materials to produce to an excellent standard. My though is, we have been spoilt by the availability of cheaply made, sweatshop produced crafts from third World countries, and cannot recognise quality or appreciate the hours of design and labour which go into crafted things.

Again, I see in 'special' markets (we have a continental one), handmade goods at less than we can produce them here. The whole thing makes me so cross, The majority of the British public don't appreciate quality made goods which aren't mass produced.

Cheers, HG

To be fair I think this attitude was a direct result of the war years when everything had to be home made. My generation still remembers the frugal Christmases and it's that mind set that bought is best which has been passed on to future generations. Pity but there it is.

p00

My children are grown up, meaning turned 30, and an agreement was made between brothers and sisters not to buy anything for each other but just to enjoy each others company. Only the young children get anythng as Christmas is for children is it not. Those that belive in Santa bless them.

Effort is made for birthdays as they are personal.

I would now try to make agreements only to buy/make for the little ones in future as it would save all future arguements and give you a lot less work to do making gifts for people who dont appreciate them. Which gives you more time to do the things you want to do for your own family.

Less hassle, less stress, less wasted money too.

xxp00

avocetgirl

I've only just read this! I'm an shocked that someone can be so heartless!

We received a homemade hamper from my husbands sister and thought it was a lovely idea! Christmas is far to commercial and next year we are planning on doing something along the same lines! I think it's the way to go. Big hugs!

xxx

Kandipandi

This is terrible. Even if he thought that how dare he say it.

A very similar thing happened to me last christmas, I made a movie hamper for my Brother and his wife, here it is:




They do not usually buy for me and my DH and as they buy for our kids we never expect anything, as they dont have any kids yet I thought I would make this for them.

He rang me a week later to say that he thought the hamper looked excellent until he opened the DVD case and found that there was only money in it.
He thought we had done him lots of PIRATED DVD's to watch and was quite put out that we hadn't!! He was quite nasty and I was gutted as i thought they would appreciate this homemade gift.

Needless to say they didn't get such a thoughtful gift this year!

Edit: Sorry the pics are massive!!

SallyForth_2

I think the sadest thing is apart from the rudeness is whether the ungratefullness was really extended to the rest of the family. Okay, so the children might have expected toys, especially if they are younger, they might have only just grasped the concept of a pressie containing 'stuff', and while the opening of this gift might not have had them tearing around the room like loons, probably because they didn't recognise what it was, I bet they liked the contents when they got round to consuming them. I don't believe the children would have been ungrateful, confused perhaps, that where the parents need to step in and explain what they have received. Instead, this man just assumed they were dissapointed and reacted atrociously. I wonder what the Mum thought, and whether she shared her husbands point of view?

clairehi

How little/much the present cost in your time and effort or indeed if you had blown ££ on them, there is no excuse for such rudeness.

Like everyone else I am totally gobsmacked at your BIL's behaviour and feel so sad for you and your OH. Hope BILs attitude is not passed on to his kids.

We dont choose our families do we but I hope you can put this behind you at some point as it would be a shame if your LO missed out on friendship with his cousins as a result. perhaps an upfront agreement of no presents/agree a limited budget for next year would be best.

DianneB

Just had to go OT for a moment and say WOW to Kandipandi, that hamper is stunning!!

fifitrix123

I had ungrateful family like that even though I never received anything from them as they couldn't afford anything for me! I would have even appreciated a card and they seemed to think that me spending £25 each on 5 of them was not enough!!! So I just didn't bother again........
My chav niece with 6 kids with a chap who has never worked a legal day in his life and expects us to pay for gifts for kids who are just his with his ex!!! She used to moan about gifts bought by everyone as they never spent enough..
She and her partner and his family ought to try getting jobs to pay for their own as they spend it all on drinking and at the bookies........
I would have loved one of your hampers don't let them get you down spend it all on your own kids next year!!!!