19 and in debt already.

firestronaut

Would you tell a schizophrenic not to hear voices anymore?
Would you tell a depressed person that they have no reason to be down?
How about telling an agoraphobic to step outside?

No? They really, you shouldn't be telling a bi-polar person not to spend. It's a SYMPTOM. That's the bit you're missing.
In a manic phase, you have no self-control, there are no consequences and reason doesn't exist.

Understanding a condition before commenting on it is always a good idea.



Back to the problem in hand, you really need to start writing letters and making phone calls to these people to set up payment plans. Sitting around worrying isn't going to help - and from my experience - can cause more manic phases.

If you really can't do that, you need to hand over your finances to your mum or your carer.

ferox666

firestronaut wrote: »

£280. DLA doesn't count as income.

It may not "count" as income in a tax sense, but that money is still being received. Of course it should be included in a SOA as money coming in so the poster can work out where it is being spent. It can be used for essentials or to help pay off more debt before interest/charges makes the situation even worse. Don't be so pedantic, some of us are trying to help here.

cat4772

firestronaut wrote: »

Would you tell a schizophrenic not to hear voices anymore?
Would you tell a depressed person that they have no reason to be down?
How about telling an agoraphobic to step outside?

No? They really, you shouldn't be telling a bi-polar person not to spend. It's a SYMPTOM. That's the bit you're missing.
In a manic phase, you have no self-control, there are no consequences and reason doesn't exist.

Understanding a condition before commenting on it is always a good idea.

I don't believe I advised the OP NOT to spend, I suggested that she take action by preparing a SOA to see where her money goes so she can pay off her debts AND that she could plan to save up some money to offset future manic periods where she has no control over spending.

firestronaut wrote: »

Back to the problem in hand, you really need to start writing letters and making phone calls to these people to set up payment plans. Sitting around worrying isn't going to help - and from my experience - can cause more manic phases.

If you really can't do that, you need to hand over your finances to your mum or your carer.

OP - highlighted text says it all. Hoping to see your SOA here soon.

firestronaut

ferox666 wrote: »

It may not "count" as income in a tax sense, but that money is still being received. Of course it should be included in a SOA as money coming in so the poster can work out where it is being spent. It can be used for essentials or to help pay off more debt before interest/charges makes the situation even worse. Don't be so pedantic, some of us are trying to help here.

DLA is not income. DLA is there to help the reciever deal with whatever problems/issues there are that has resulted in being able to actually being able to recieve it.
DLA is issued to help that person attend support groups, do activities to relieve the stress of that disorder, etc etc. Telling someone to spend their DLA on debts is out of order, in my opinion. It takes money away from the things it should be spent on.

And I'm not answering your last statement. Carry on talking !!!!, idiot.

I'm done with the thread. From the looks of things, OP isn't going to follow any advice and its turning into a !!!!!fest about mental health.


And cat - I wasn't talking about you. It was aimed at the people who have no clue about the symptoms on bi-polar and what it does to you

ferox666

firestronaut wrote: »

DLA is not income.

Yes it is. Not taxable income, but income nonetheless, to assist the receipient.

DLA is there to help the reciever deal with whatever problems/issues there are that has resulted in being able to actually being able to recieve it.
DLA is issued to help that person attend support groups, do activities to relieve the stress of that disorder, etc etc.

Agreed. But many receipients do not "ringfence" the money for this purpose. Some do, some don't. Some spend the entire amount they receive on the things you listed, others spend more, others spend less, some spend none. There's no point pretending otherwise.

Telling someone to spend their DLA on debts is out of order, in my opinion. It takes money away from the things it should be spent on.

I didn't tell them that. All I suggested was that the original poster make a full summary (Statement of Affairs) of all money coming in and all money going out each month. Perhaps the £280 DLA is entirely spent on the things you listed, and this would be shown in the Statement of Affairs. If not, and some or all is being spent on general spending, then there is room for improvement. Throwing any surplus to the debts to prevent further interest/charges is better than it going on general "living" costs if there is room to cut down on those.

I'm done with the thread. From the looks of things, OP isn't going to follow any advice and its turning into a !!!!!fest about mental health.

You are the one that is turning it into a "!!!!fest" as you so eloquently put it. I see most people offering constructive help, and you being over-sensitive and even aggressive, and assuming people are questioning the poster's condition. I suggest you vent your anger elsewhere and if you don't like differing points of view, don't use a public forum.

MrsTinks

I'm the first to admit I don't understand bi-polar - HOWEVER whilst there is certainly genuine issues relating to bipolar then there is also a few things that crop up... at 19 - you "haven't tried for years to hold down a job for more than 1 month"... I appreciate that it might be HARDER to hold down a job, so look at what you CAN do... if it's remaining in one place then look at temping - you'd be able to move to different employers regularly. Look at the WHY you can't hold a job - then at how you can change the pattern.
Spending - If you spend on a high then maybe until your medication is levelled out a little it would be an idea to let your mum control your money? You are fortunate that you are living at home with her and I'm willing to bet that she'd help with this. Hand her your card and ask her to help you pay your debts and give you an allowance each week.
The money you owe your ex - this is not a priority - you may wish to pay it back but right now you have far more pressing priorities with other creditors - as far as legally standing is concerned your ex stands NOWHERE in the line to get his money back. You need to deal with the other creditors first - when you have done that THEN look at paying him back.
Your mum technically comes in at the same level of priority as him but as you live with her any "repayments" could be ear marked as rent etc...

MyLastFiver

If you have periods of zero self-control, then leave your money with someone (your mum?) who *does* have self-control. Then you can't spend it. Simples innit.

euronorris

timmmers wrote: »

Usually I feel sympathy for folk in trouble, especially those who are ill in some way.
No illness makes you jet off on several holidays funded by other people IMO though, that;'s something requiring planning.

As I understand it, however, episodes aren't short lived (hours/days). They can last weeks/months. So, buying and going on a last minute package holiday, could very easily occur during an episode.

I have very little understanding of bi-polar so please correct me if I am wrong.

Tayler - I think MrsTine's suggestion of working as a temp could be a good idea. You could pick it up and drop it as and when it suited. Although, I have just thought about the mess this could cause with the benefits.

Perhaps there are other things you can do to supplement your income. Like ironing, or walking dogs. Hey, so long as you're not afraid of dogs, the dog walking could be great. A wonderful chance to get out, get free exercise, fresh air. I really wish I wasn't in the office now! lol

I think you will get through this with the right budgetting and preparation. Some of the suggestions I have seen are great and should definitely be looked into.

In terms of entertainment, perhaps (with permission from your Mum), you could have friends round for dinner/movies etc every now and then. You'll then be able to maintain your social life at a reduced cost.

Don't forget to do that SOA. And get your Mum to help you if it all seems a bit overwhelming.

Good luck!