Falling for friend at work(i'm married)

Claire3121

I'm a hairdresser and have known one of the stylists for a few years now. I'm currently 16 weeks pregnant and last month I had a scare at work(I lost a baby in late preg 6 years ago so v anxious).
My OH understandably is very scared about this pregnancy,as am I,and as a result buries himself in his work.
I started bleeding at work,last month and this stylist came with me to hospital,took time off work and basically stayed morning to night for almost a week to look after me.

This is when it gets tricky. I was half asleep on the sofa when he stroked my hair and kissed me. Nothing more has been said but he told me he's falling for me big time,last week,and I'm starting to grow very fond of him too..


I would just appreciate any advice as my head is in a muddle. Thanks for reading xxx

**confuzzled**

Sounds like you're looking to him for the reassurance and affection you and your husband should be sharing with one another. You'd be better talking to your husband about everything with regards to the baby and how scary/stressful you're both finding it and maybe try some counselling to help you cope with it. Maybe your doctor could refer you to a counselloing service

Whatever happens I wish you all the best in the remainder of the pregnancy

x

emlou2009

your hormones are all over the place, you're tired, you're worried. you're feeling lonely cos your OH is being a typical man and burying his head in the sand from worry. talk to him!

as for the feelings for the other man, by the time the baby comes you will be so exhausyed and caught up in baby baby baby you will probably forget you ever felt this way!

mrcow

Are you sure you're not just flattered that he's giving you the attention you want and therefore just wanting some more.

You weren't interested in him before he started showing you some affection.

My advice? Steer clear of him. You've got more important things to be worryig about than cheating on your boyfriend. Tell your boyfriend that you need to be making more of a fuss over each other - burying himself in work isn't what you need right now - book a table for dinner and start spending some time with each other.

**skinnyminny**

I would honestly say that you should sit down and talk to your OH about your fears and that you would really like for both of you to start to communicate a bit more.

I really really would not take things any further with this person, your oh is probally just trying to deal with things his way, which is probally not the best way.
Please talk to your oh, this should be a wonderful time for you both to treasure forever, but i understand it must be difficult if you work with this person, feelings can grow but i think he should have kept quiet and not confused you at such a worrying time.

I hope all works out well for you

Fridayschild

Hi Claire,
Some very sensible advice has already been given, but I will add to it anyway. You are responding to this man at a very difficult time in your life. For whatever reason your partner is unable to give you his full support right now. You need to talk to him about it if you can. A similar thing happened to me in different circumstances and I was stupid enough to respond to the affection offered..... long story but I spent the next two years rebuilding the damage caused to myself and those around me which was catastrophic. DONT GO THERE ..... it is never worth it. Sort things out, don't fill the void in your life with an alternative.

I say these things to save you the anguish I put myself and my loved ones through.
K xx

Claire3121

Thanks everyone for your help. My head is all over the place at the moment. I'm also a little worried about christmas day. My OH is working and I invited the OP over for the day,as he was also on his own. I will have my son with us too,but i'm still anxious about it all.

I feel over the past month,closer the the OP because I had been practically sharing things with him that I should have been sharing with my husband.....

Zazen999

Claire3121 wrote: »

Thanks everyone for your help. My head is all over the place at the moment. I'm also a little worried about christmas day. My OH is working and I invited the OP over for the day,as he was also on his own. I will have my son with us too,but i'm still anxious about it all.

I feel over the past month,closer the the OP because I had been practically sharing things with him that I should have been sharing with my husband.....

So cancel your plans. Seriously. Do you want your child/ren to grow up in a broken home? Refocus your energies towards your husband.

Morgan_Ree

Claire3121 wrote: »

Thanks everyone for your help. My head is all over the place at the moment. I'm also a little worried about christmas day. My OH is working and I invited the OP over for the day,as he was also on his own. I will have my son with us too,but i'm still anxious about it all.

I feel over the past month,closer the the OP because I had been practically sharing things with him that I should have been sharing with my husband.....

Does your OH know this man is coming over??

Oldernotwiser

Claire3121 wrote: »

Thanks everyone for your help. My head is all over the place at the moment. I'm also a little worried about christmas day. My OH is working and I invited the OP over for the day,as he was also on his own. I will have my son with us too,but i'm still anxious about it all.

I feel over the past month,closer the the OP because I had been practically sharing things with him that I should have been sharing with my husband.....

What a hurtful thing do to your husband - what on earth were you thinking about?

Claire3121

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

What a hurtful thing do to your husband - what on earth were you thinking about?

By sharing I meant,the OP was at the hospital and looking after me. Should have made myself clearer.