How to cope when OH picks friends over you

welshmoneylover

I asked my OH the other saturday if we could go out, he went and arranged to go out with his mates again p*ssing me off a bit. We never go anywhere as a couple, yet as soon as his mates ring he's straight off to the pub.

How the heck do I cope with this? Suggestions are most welcome right now.

tandraig

jeez welshmoneylover - simple solution - go with him ! You can then sit with the other wives and girlfriends and be bored simple (as is traditional in the valleys) but at least you get your drinks bought for you! oh - by the way keep a sharp eye out at the end of the evening in case he forgets you are there and leaves without you. as my OH did once!

tandraig

seriously hun, why dont you just have a girly night out or look forward to a nice relaxing girly evening in (with total control of the tv remote)?:beer: or a couple of glasses of wine a box of chocs and a really soppy dvd!

welshmoneylover

Thing is hun, he goes out of town with the chaps so wouldn't get my drinks bought anyway!!

As for the wives and girlfriends, well, I don't seem to have much in common with them to talk about!

Sad I know, but I also don't have many female friends myself that live local. My work friends that I get on great with live miles away and having a taxi is a bit expensive around here!

Sound pathetic don't I? :rotfl:

busiscoming2

Welshmoneylover, no you don't sound pathetic, on the contrary your OH sounds like he needs a kick up the bottom to make him realise how he is neglecting you!

Have you told him how you feel?

welshmoneylover

Yup, I've told him. He's planning to go out with them all day boxing day after I asked him if we could spend some time together over xmas!

Bl**dy men, I do pick 'em. lol.

Thing is, I don't mind him going out with his mates. I just wish he would spend time with me once in a while.

jenhug

Is he doing it on purpose? I'm getting from your post that you ask to spend time with him and he is deliberately arranging something else.

jamespir

my gf's ex was the same he wouldnt do anything wiithout his mates he still dont

Welshlover put you foot down and ground him for a weekend he's acting like a child so treat him like one

welshmoneylover

Hey, thanks for all the positive comments. I was beginning to wonder whether it was me being childish.. lol

Alias_Omega

You should go out with him, his mates will want to get to know you. Then once he has had a few pints he will become all lovey..

Then at the end of the night, he will want to go home before you...

Maybe you should go "Pint 4 Pint"...i have 5 and im drunk...


<<

---

Cheap night out

tandraig

is he a valleys man and his mates are rugby/footy? and its saturday nights or training nights?
my OH puts rugby first! where was he when i was in labour with firstborn? playing rugby of course (shouldnt have gone into labour on saturday morning - what was i thinking of!!!) he did manage to get there in time for delivery - but only cos my mum virtually chased him off the pitch! I can laugh now - but at the time it wasnt funny. I had a very bad labour and needed some support!
as for - its traditional for wives and girlfriends to be in group and the 'lads' all congregate around bar! still goes on I am afraid. I wont go out with him now - and he feels hurt!!! boo hoo - why should I? I have nothing in common with other wives and GFs - I tried to fit in but found them all as deep as a saucer of milk! so I prefer to stay in and do what I want!
If he deliberately does this hun - then turn the tables - now - when he wants to go out - you are going out with girls! see how he likes it? but if he is like my OH - that wont work as you are supposed to fit in with his life! do i sound bitter? probably - my OH is a good man in many ways - but rugby comes first - even to the extent where i would be begging him not to go out as i thought youngest son would be in hospital before the night was out (severe asthma) and he was - and i would spend ages on phone trying to get him to come down hospital. now - i think its safe to say we have separate lives tho we live in same house. I dont depend on him - sad I know - but true