I'm pregnant

MrsTinks

I haven't read all the replies but just a few things:

CHILDREN ARE NOT CHEAP! Sorry to burst your illusions here LOL

Ok - breastfeeding is great, the best for baby and free - BUT there is no guarantee you can brestfeed! I had no end of problems but managed to carry on for over 3 months - at this point my daughter became too damned nosey and would try to turn her head whilst still latched on - and it HURT Other people have simply been unable to get on with breastfeeding despite loads of effort so make sure you have formula in your budget from the start - if you don't need it then it's a safety net
How much money you will need to stay at home - work out how much you can actually live on - then add 20% for "unknowns"
Nappies will depend on if you use brands or supermarket own - I have found that Huggies fit Alex best - pampers will do in an emergency and the couple of ownbrand I have tried were a royal disaster - that could just be because the fitting of them all vary slightly and they may just not have fitted my poopmachine...

Yes you can make children "cheap" or expensive - but as a rule? I haven't found mine to be very cheap at all!

pinkshoes

Taidraig and Sidekick,

Can I ask what form of contraception you were using if you both fell pregnant unexpectedly?

I'm not wanting a baby at the moment, and get a bit freaked out by the amount of contraception failures I read about! I take my pill very accurately and rely solely on that, as I'm allergic to most condoms!

Sidekick2

pinkshoes - i was on cilest bc. i did miss a few days in the pack in Sept so this could explain it.

MrsTinks

No pill is 100% pinkshoes... I had a miscarriage when I was in my early 20's (and on the pill - taken religiously!) and it came as a serious wake up call for me at the time! I think the pill generally is about 97-98% effective... So out of every 100 women 2 or 3 will fall pregnant (and that's of those who take it according to the package and it can happen at any time!)... if you REALLY do not want to fall pregnant then condom is the only way - there are ones available for the "hypersensitive" or people with allergies to the usual rubber material (I know because a mate of mine has to get them... if he uses normal ones he WOULD go into shock - he decided to tell us about it just in case something ever happened as it was a shared house at the time...)

I would suggest speaking to your GP if you know that you can't run the risk of falling pregnant at the moment...

my_gorgeous_ellie-belle

Alias_Omega wrote: »

Hello,

I was a single lad until i was 26 yrs old, when my gf (now wife) fell pregnant, it was the biggest shock of my life. She had a daughter from a previous relationship, so maybe not a big step for her. I had to change from having a single life of fast cars, lots of cash to family life. It was hard to change, but took a whilst.

Going through the growing stages of the bump was good, but when the bundle arrived it was hard. As a baby i was not really interested, but when he was older & could respond to me we really bonded.

He is nearly 2 yrs old & i miss him so much when im away with work, i love the hugs & kisses from him. I should of done it years earlier...

Alias_Omega - i think you are perfectly normal in that respect! My OH was quite the same, a baby was a little boring to him even though he wouldn't admit it as such, but once our daughter started to really interact with him he just melted and DD is now his little princess!!!!

As for how expensive they are i think depends on your current lifestyle too - as if you are generally very social and like to go out alot (even if it's just once a week), you'll find you'll save an awful lot as socialising generally becomes visiting friends or having friends over for a night in rather than spend out If you were really frugal before, then yes it'll be expensive!

I am sorry that MrsTine found it expensive which shows it really is different for each family (i understand about the breastfeeding bit too, ouch...my DD used to bite - owwww, lol) - i didn't at all, but that's prob because i was young (me and OH were just 20) and i used to love socialising with work friends, or he'd have rock climbing days etc with his friends. We had already been living together since 16 but loved to 'live life to the full' if you like! We were more skint by the end of each month then than now, lol - and the only help we get is Child Benefit !

shopsalot

Congratulations!

If it helps I felt way too young to be having my first boy and was even scared to tell my mom (despite being with my now husband for 7 years)- but it was the best thing i ever did!

I worried about my social life, career, money, car high heels etc - but you priorities change if not immediately after the birth - very soon after and you dont need the money you thought you did.

NCT sales and Freecycle make the whole thing very manageable money wise - and you will be very surprised at the generosity of friends and family when they hear a new baby is coming.

My boy is now 10 months old and though i still have so much to learn, i do not worry half as much any more - not because the money is easier but because i care less about the detail and more about the family.

Keep us updated with how you get on - and keep asking questions x

esio_trot

MrsTine wrote: »

I think the pill generally is about 97-98% effective... So out of every 100 women 2 or 3 will fall pregnant (and that's of those who take it according to the package and it can happen at any time!)... if you REALLY do not want to fall pregnant then condom is the only way

just like to add, not true. They have approximately the same fail rate as the contraceptive pill (which I too was taking religiously, so there's 2 out of 100 already ).

Edinburghlass_2

Having a baby isn't expensive, bringing them up for the next 18 years can be

MrsTinks

mgeb - I can symapthise - like you we get £20 a week which everyone gets - that's it... *sigh* Maybe that's why I found it all quite expensive? Yes ok we bought nice furniture for her room etc but I also found that round here there isn't much in the way of 2nd hand sales which means everything has to be new or ebay grrr

tandraig

hmmmm contraception - first time was condom (came off in the er excitement) second time i was on pill had to come off it and was given a diaphragm - only forgot wasnt on pill anymore and didnt use it the first time!!! so it was mostly sheer carelessness!!! but i dont regret it wouldnt be without my first and thirdborn!