The Ultimate Incentive proposed! Time for an ultimate challenge...

Cinny91

Dinah93 wrote: »

Its not that his dad wants to wait a week that drives me mad, its the fact NIM decided this without me, then told me what was going to happen.

That was really unfair and quite mean of NIM! He cannot decide something like that on his own without your input.

Flower08 wrote: »

Im sure you could put a request in

Was just about to say that!

Dinah93

NIM has replied to my email with 'you told me to negotiate so thats what i'm doing'. Erm, no, I told you no more games and just make the offer so we'll know one way or another.

Dinah93

Okay I'm a bit calmer, its not NIMs fault his dad withdrew the deposit unless we wait. That said I'm still seriously non plused with him, he can choose his own damn house, I'll pay him rent.

Tete_en_l'Air

Just spent a very nice half hour cooing over colleague's 5 week old son - still don't want one though!

When is Stamp Duty relief over? I'd not be very happy with NIM's dad withdrawing the deposit unless you wait - what so 'do as I say or you don't get the money'? I'd rather save my own deposit than play those kinds of games.

Dinah93

So would I Tete, I've been looking at rentals. No doubt NIM will say I'm being dramatic and short sighted though. I can't keep doing this though, planning a wedding and buying a house are two of the three most stressfull life evets, and I feel like I'm being fought on one of them, and left completely on the other one (when I don't even want the stupid big wedding!), so I'm ducking out of the house buying. He can buy a house where he chooses if he so wants, but I'm not playing games.

Lara44

How big is the new offer Dinah? If it's under £125,000 then you still won't have to pay stamp duty as this is the new threshold. As we are in a chain we will have to cough up (if it all goes through)

I think renting is still all cool though, we rented for 4 years and saved and had a great time. Houses are always coming onto the market, you might only rent for 6 months until you see a place you can all agree on. You could decide to rent for 1 year from the late summer to give you a clear year after the wedding to find and make a start on a suitable house project.

It is difficult to arrange a wedding, house buying and house redecorating all at once. And for me, I think it's quite nice to spread it out a little bit to have always something exciting going on to enjoy.

ETA we are going to postpone the wedding until 2011 if we get the house (as it would be a real stretch to have the cash for both). And I would like to buy some new things for the house without feeling guilty.

Dinah93

The whole point of this house is we have a once in a lifetime chance to livesomewhere rent free, take on a project, do it up, and have a much better house for less money than if we bought one that wasn't a shack. But heyho, I know what I am willing to spend per month, if they faff about and end up picking a more expensive house NIMs dad is going to have to cough up a bigger deposit, or we're going to be renting somewhere instead.

Flower08

Dinah93 wrote: »

Okay I'm a bit calmer, its not NIMs fault his dad withdrew the deposit unless we wait. That said I'm still seriously non plused with him, he can choose his own damn house, I'll pay him rent.

I do think that is really unfair, a gift shouldnt come with terms and conditions. I can completely understand why you are getting fustrated with the situation.

I hope you can get something sorted with NIMs dad. It would be an incredible gift, but like tete said i would rather save the money myself that have all these conditions with it.

wendz86

Sounds like a nightmare Dinah. Isn't fair that his decision is affecting your plans.

I would also agree that renting isn't all bad.

Dinah93

I dispise renting, but I can't afford to buy on my own so I don't have a choice in the matter.