Liability Order Application, urgent help plz!

catenorfolk

jacklink wrote: »

did you know ALL commumnication is recorded, ALL calls are logged, ALL times, ALL notes on the system ect., you have a right by law to request all info about you, all calls, all notes ect.

yeah right!!!!!! i ring the csa at least once a week and half of the time nothing is recorded. luckily i write notes each time i call

stressed_nrp

chriszzz wrote: »

Until you have been on the receiving end of a in-human pwc then no one will understand were your coming from, some havent the ability to put themselves in others shoes they can only think of there own experiences and some also just absolutely refuse to believe that there are genuine nrp who are really having the pi55 took out of them :mad:

(Just got back on net after house move, i've really missed chatting to pwc and nrps who are going through and have gone through the same things as me).

I completely understand chriszzz my ex has been really selfish when it comes to our childs needs and have given and refused access at a whim, not understanding that the person these changes affect most are the child. Don't get me wrong it's heartbreaking for me to not be allowed contact from month to month year to year, however how on earth can kids grow up having any level of self esteem when their main carer can mess with their affections soo much. It makes me feel bad everyday to know how much i've failed my child and how reckless I was to have had a child so young and with someone that was I totally incompatible with.

Personally I am not sure how I could ever explain away all the things that happened and how contact was lost without it looking, to my child, as though I am blaming the ex and I think our child has heard enough opinions and nasty comments, he doesn't need me to reciprocate. I have to now assume that one of the reasons that my child hasn't made contact, despite now being an adult, is because he assumes that this is exactly what's going to happen and that's not exactly going to entice you to make contact with your long lost parent.

plimsoll

loobyloo0302 wrote: »

Sorry.. really thick question here but do the DP files only contain details of calls, emails, letters, etc of those that the NRP has made or do they also show that of what the PWC has made? Also, can the PWC request the exact same DP files as those that the NRP recieves or will theirs be completely different? Sorry if this sounds like a really silly question

when I rang CSA recently to check/get deductions re-instated (had dropped off due to him being in prison, not re-instated when he got out, I forgot to call them for a couple months) the person I spoke to informed me that they had "contacted" NRP in July (would've been just after he got out). Didn't tell me why (I'm guessing a request for income info them having noticed no longer getting the deductions from JSA) or if actually got hold of him or what type of contact. so possibly it includes dates of contact or such like but no details only a guess tho I've never requested files

chriszzz

stressed_nrp wrote: »

(Just got back on net after house move, i've really missed chatting to pwc and nrps who are going through and have gone through the same things as me).

I completely understand chriszzz my ex has been really selfish when it comes to our childs needs and have given and refused access at a whim, not understanding that the person these changes affect most are the child. Don't get me wrong it's heartbreaking for me to not be allowed contact from month to month year to year, however how on earth can kids grow up having any level of self esteem when their main carer can mess with their affections soo much. It makes me feel bad everyday to know how much i've failed my child and how reckless I was to have had a child so young and with someone that was I totally incompatible with.

Personally I am not sure how I could ever explain away all the things that happened and how contact was lost without it looking, to my child, as though I am blaming the ex and I think our child has heard enough opinions and nasty comments, he doesn't need me to reciprocate. I have to now assume that one of the reasons that my child hasn't made contact, despite now being an adult, is because he assumes that this is exactly what's going to happen and that's not exactly going to entice you to make contact with your long lost parent.

Hi Stressed,
Please don't be to hard on yourself, you cant be blamed for meeting somebody who you thought at the time was for you! It can take a while before we realize that we have made a mistake or we are not compatible no more! It takes two to become parents and if one of the parents has not got the children s best interest at heart then you cant blame yourself, your ex has the biggest influence over your child and if she has not done her best to enable you and your child a healthy relationship then she is failing the child, not you. It is obvious that you have wanted to be the good parent but you have had barriers put in your way by the other parent.

Its a very sad case when pwc does this for no other reason than they just can. I really dont know what they get out of denying their own children the love of the other parent. Sometimes It makes me wonder if they are not comfortable with their own parental skills, because any pwc who was comfortable, would be encouraging every opportunity that the child wants to spend with the other parent.

Hopefully in the near future you will regain a relationship with your son again.