Should I go or not?

webitha

why do you need to give an excuse at all, with people that toxic, i would just say no, and send a card an fiver...
and the next time your father (note i didnt say dad) turned up with the spoilt brat, i would say sorry no can do and close the door

Zazen999

He expects alot of you doesn't he?

Take your family including your son out for the day instead. Have a lovely day out and stop doing what your dad wants all the time. I'd not even suggest a meet up as you know it will end in someone's tears.

Any

I personally would not go. And wouldn't even open the door if they come calling.

One thing I am unsure from your post - do you get on with your sister?

But then I personally would also move away from this horrible people as far as possible to make sure they have no influence on my children and that by not having to see them every day I can forget they exist and live normal and happy life.

mrcow

Do not go.

Arrange to go out somewhere and make your apologies and send a card and/or present if you normally would.

Don't put yourself or your family though this. It's simply not worth it. You have your own family to care and love for, you need to put them first (and yourself!)

mummy_Jay

Take the kids bowling that night, or the cinema. Chose something your DS will want to do, rather than the family do.

Then send a note appologising for not being able to go to your sister and said child.

I would also make arrangements for xmas whilst at it so you don't have to put up with them then either. It really doesn't sound like a healthy atmosphere for any kid to be around.

DKLS

I wouldnt go anywhere near that lot and if it was me I would cut them out of my life for good, I would rather gnaw my own legs off very slowly than attend a do with those people.

maggied_2

I am really shocked by your story and think it's admirable that you have already tolerated so much.

I completely agree with everyone above about not going and for all the same reasons. I also don't think it's good for your children to see you being treated in this way and think you are right to protect your son from his gf's views.
Although it may not be fair to keep grandparents and granchildren apart I think in this case it is well justified - you have your family unit to think about. You have every right to put your foot down and make sure your family are otherwise engaged that day.

I know at 16 your son is old enough to make some decisions himself but on this occasion he may have to listen to mum - the alternative could be him getting drunk with your dad while listening to his rather outdated views of the world.

If you feel you must show your face I would do what poppyolivia suggested and pop in on your way somewhere.

Another poster has pointed out we don't know whether you get on with your sister. If so could you arrange to go round before your parents so then cousin doesn't miss out and you avoid any flak for missing the birthday?

You've taken enought crap from these people by the sounds of things - time to draw a line under it! And I wouldn't be doing anymore babysitting either - "he'll be wanting to play on the computer" How rude!!

Good luck with it - honestly I wouldn't go and wouldn't have any more to do with your parents - your role is to protect your family unit, not make allowances for people who treat you and yours as second best.

C xxx

pebbles88

hi,

oh you poor thing ((HUGS)). I certainly agree with other posters, just dont go, make plans to do something with your family. Blood isnt thicker than water and as has been said, if a friend treated like they have you wouldnt still be friends with them.

i really hope you get something sorted, xxx

Zazen999

I'm so annoyed, I'm tempted to take you all out myself.

Mojisola

emma12345 wrote: »

I have spoken to them many times about the way they are towards my 2 children. They aren't interested. Unless we are worshipping their other grandchild with them or they are using us for something we (and their other grandchildren) are valueless to them and are ignored.

Please find the courage to cut yourself and your family off from these people.