Relationship Imploding; Where Do I Stand?

GSXRCarlos

I just wanted to wish you the best of luck, i hate blokes like this! They give us all a bad name, get him kicked out, let him go live with one of these fancy women.

You need to find a good male friend (Brother in law, friends husband) to help you out, if i knew this had happened to anyone i know i'd wanna kill him, but i'd definitely help you sort the house out.

Where abouts are you?

Fire_Fox

(((((HUGS))))) :A

Throw him out now, you don't deserve to put up with this a minute longer. :mad: There are several singles who post regularly on this board who own their own home and let a room to fund renovations. If you have two bedrooms and think the smaller one is too small it might be fine for a weekday only lodger, or occasional foreign language students, or even for you to use as a crash space so you can let the larger bedroom.

BestServedCold

Many thanks all - I've rewritten the first post to remove a lot of the person stuff in case he happens across it. I usually only look at the pure finances (debt/housing) boards so if looks at any convos I've taken part in on my true name he hopefully won't alight on this board as it's one I never visit.

Anyway on the proof side. I have bank statements for about the past 5 years. I also have access to his which show an empty account for years on end. I have no proof of the snip as he apparently had that done before we met. I have receipts from all the major things bought for the house (new windows/doors, new bathroom, kitchen, flooring etc etc) and the corresponding bank statements showing the payments so he wouldn't be able to show anything he's paid for here.... even a pint of milk I doubt!

He does think something is up though. I went out for a long walk last night with the dog and when I got back a neighbour said he'd gone looking for me and was worried.

I have to say that when I get out of this I'm in NO hurry to get into another relationship. I think I may explore the sperm donar route for children before it's too late or if that's no good, well perhaps I could foster and give some kid having a hard time a solid roof. It sounds pathetic, but i do feel I have a lot of love to give for a child, whether mine or not and being an only child myself, I don't have nieces/nephews to lavish affection on. The last thing I want to do is throw myself headlong into something when I've been SUCH a FOOL this time around. I also think that it'd take a long time and someone pretty bloody special to make me have trust.

Thank you all so much for the support and i'll let you know what happens next

Fire_Fox

BestServedCold wrote: »

He does think something is up though. I went out for a long walk last night with the dog and when I got back a neighbour said he'd gone looking for me and was worried.

I have to say that when I get out of this I'm in NO hurry to get into another relationship. I think I may explore the sperm donar route for children before it's too late or if that's no good, well perhaps I could foster and give some kid having a hard time a solid roof. It sounds pathetic, but i do feel I have a lot of love to give for a child, whether mine or not and being an only child myself, I don't have nieces/nephews to lavish affection on. The last thing I want to do is throw myself headlong into something when I've been SUCH a FOOL this time around. I also think that it'd take a long time and someone pretty bloody special to make me have trust.

Thank you all so much for the support and i'll let you know what happens next

I don't think it sounds pathetic at all to say you you have a lot of love to give! You have obviously thrown your heart and soul into this it has been stamped on repeatedly in return. :mad:

paddy's_mum

If loving someone deeply and sharing everything you are, everything you aspire to, everything you have is being a "stupid fool" then I can reassure you that 90% of the population of this country are exactly, precisely and utterly the same!

The fact that he is an absolute rotter does not make your gifts any the less valuable. I've always felt that the only people who don't ever get taken for a ride in this life are the ones like him who are far too hard, unloving, cynical and cunning to "get took." I know which of the two of you I'm certain is the nicer and more honest person.

LOUBY28

I know you are heartbroken to find out this after all the years you have loved and supported him, and you feel the time to have a child may have been stolen from you.

But I would try and look at him having the snip as a positive thing, as if you had a child you would be linked to this horrible lying man for ever really.......and you would be in a worse position as you would have been working all the hours to make ends meet as he probabley would not have gotten a job even if you were pregnant.

You sound lovely, and I am sure you will have lots of love to give to a child, and think how much more fun and happy your home will be without this albertros hanging around your neck.
All the best, take care x

carolinosourus

How're things going?

ceebeeby

Have just found this thread. Wanted to send a wee hug along. How're you doing?

Karen_30

Hello,

Just found this thread and wanted to send you lots of good wishes and hugs at this horrible time. I can't add anything to the advice you have had but wish you all the best and hope that you are ok? I'm going through a break up at the moment and although not the same as yours understand your feelings and sense of loss.....you sound like a lovely person who has so much to give and when the time is right there will be someone out there right for you who will treat you the way you deserve to be.

Take care of you xx

mum2one

Karen_30 wrote: »

Hello,

Just found this thread and wanted to send you lots of good wishes and hugs at this horrible time. I can't add anything to the advice you have had but wish you all the best and hope that you are ok? I'm going through a break up at the moment and although not the same as yours understand your feelings and sense of loss.....you sound like a lovely person who has so much to give and when the time is right there will be someone out there right for you who will treat you the way you deserve to be.

Take care of you xx

So sorry your going through a break up, hope it goes smoothly (in the nicest of ways), take care of yourself x