What is the point?

beanielou

Great post ShoeGal

yellowduck_2

Hi Losingit, just wanted to say that things do get better, talking about how we feel is the first step as we can then start to sound out what action we feel able to take. I have found this forum a great source of advice and comfort, the annonimity helps, epecially as you say you do not want to burden others with stuff. I still have debt, but over the past three years have managed to reduce it from just over £16k to £6k. Things are not too good for me at the moment, but they were way worse 3 years ago and I know that time passes, we take steps to sort out our problems and hopefully things improve.

MarkinDiss

Hi, nice to come back on here tonight and see you in a more positive frame of mind. I am going to keep checking this thread to see if you are continuing to progress!

You know that you can do it if you try, just start and watch the debts reduce. It will be slow and painful at first but you will start to see the results accelerate.

Best wishes, Mark

Losing_it

Thankyou Mark, yes much better frame of mind and again my apologies for sounding out the way I did in the first post or two, like I said before I think I just needed to vent a little.

Thankyou to every single one of you who have posted you have all helped and even made me smile. Not meant in the way it sounds but it's good to know there are people in similar situations and I do hope like myself you all come out the other side.

The debts have been going down for best part of the last 18months. The cc has interest frozen, but I'm not sure whether to start making big payments to cut this down or save the money whilst making the agreed payments and when I reach the required amount then bam pay it in one go. The thing is if I make big payments they will obviously see this and I thinking they will then start the interest again which will obviously kill things again

To you ladies who have pointed out you look at the person more than what he has or earns etc, thankyou again for restoring my faith in women. When you think about I wouldn't want to know someone who is after what I have other than who I am anyway.

So yes I am feeling positive, just hope it lasts, I have set myself something to aim for and I have been looking at what I want to do career wise, or at least to earn extra money once I have things a little more sorted out, so something else to aim for.

Going back to the car, would it be irresponsible of me to look into this. I am only looking at something like the i10 while this scrappage scheme is going. A dealer near to where I live is doing his own scheme, very well publicised nationally and has seen sales soar. But I'm also looking at from a long term perspective and the cost or running what I have at present assuming it somehow gets through the next mot. This would then obviously give me transport peace of mind for a few years at low cost without the worry of mot failure, well nothing major anyway. May go in there in the cousre of the next week or two to get an idea of what I would get for my car and what deals he is actually doing.

Any views, what to you think?

cashless_wonder

Good to hear from you again, hope all goes well with the getting the appointment at the GP. Once you are on a even keel emotionally the rest of it will all fall into place.


When I started dating again and it came to the where do live question. I'd always answer with a coy smile & knowing look - erm house share from hell or I rent a room from someone . . . End of conversation, a few more dates down the line & they seem a reasonable member of the human race tell all. You'll be surprised how many others out there have been in the same boat at some point. And the scary thing is how many will find themselves there.

If someone really cares for you it doesn't come down to what's in the bank or where you live. It's about you & all you have to offer as a person. Yeah things are great, a house would be amazing but I'd rather have what I have right now & be happy than be racing with the rest of the world to accumulate more stuff !

Keep posting you will have all the support you could ever ask for from the guys on here - they really are an amazing bunch.

MarkinDiss

The car is obviously worrying you so I would get that sorted out. It is unlikely that a car expert will come and help you out on this forum. Maybe you can have a chat with your local dealer with regard to the £2k scrappage available and, again, use a small amount of your savings to get a newer car. The government are offering you £2k on a car that is possibly worth only £500. £1500 to you if you want to invest further. I know that cars lose value quickly but if yours is a problem grab the free money!
Back to the woman thing, as a bloke I have found that honesty is best. Do not be anything but yourself. Flash don't make it, except for a shallow few. Most women want to know the real person and you should also. Relax and enjoy the fairer sex rather than thinking it is a great competion to be won.
I hope that you do well, Mark

Ames

I think there's a motoring forum on here, so it might be worth asking on there about the car?

In_Search_Of_Me

hi there - just caught this. A couple of things...I think from reading your post that GP visit should be no 1 on the to do list. 5 years not long in the grand scheme of things and look around the boards - there are lots of people who are on dmp/iva for decades...each circumstances different and we all go through stages of grief/anger/loss with debt and it does affect every area of your life.I have just made the difficult decision to sell my flat and its hard going but as others have said the love, support and friendship of friends and people here have been amazing...hang in there!

Losing_it

Thankyou, yes I'll be continuing to post. On the car subject it's more about am I right to look at replacing the car with a new one bearing in mind the debt. I know some people may say just replace it with a cheap second hand model of a smaller size, but I think you can take a risk sometimes and 2-3 years down the line I could be in the same postion of having to replace the car. As I said I'm looking at the i10 maybe so I'm not looking at spending thousands.

In_Search_Of_Me

crossed posts...sorry but cant understand why you are thinking of changing cars? Logically...on one hand you are saying you cant manage the debt you have and then are saying that you want to change cars! Sorry to be harsh but simple truth is if you want to get shot of debt then cut outgoings and pay off as much as you can...look logically of how much you earn in savings vs what you pay to debts and I'll bet that you need to use the savings to get rid of some of the debt! Choices are yours a the end of the day....