Help my DD ran up a £240 mobile phone bill

Alikay

red_devil wrote: »

no because people are weak. If nobody had branded trainers no parents gave in there would be no trouble.

My husband had parents who NEVER bought him what he wanted because, like you, they thought it was stronger and "character building" to deny their children what they wanted.

So...he got a cheap car track that never worked properly instead of a Scalextric and a secondhand folding ladies shopper bike instead of a Raleigh Chopper (boy...he LOVED them for doing that - took his christmas cash from the rest of the family towards it too...made sure he "understood the value of things"). They were too stupid to realise they were wasting money buying things he hated. He's now 46 and still can't understand them

So when our kids wanted Nike instead of Asda's Ncks trainers, and Adidas instead of Tesco Two Stripes, we got them to help pay the difference. Result = happy parents and happy kids.

I don't believe in spoiling kids either but I'm shocked by the people who seem to want to go out of their way to deprive them of nice stuff. Cheapest isn't always best.

(Sorry, I didn't mean to thank you red devil)

juliescot

red_devil wrote: »

no because people are weak. If nobody had branded trainers no parents gave in there would be no trouble.

Indeed and in the real world it will never work.

red_devil

[
So when our kids wanted Nike instead of Asda's Ncks trainers, and Adidas instead of Tesco Two Stripes, we got them to help pay the difference. Result = happy parents and happy kids.

yes but you made a rod for your own back. Who wants to be a walking advert for Nike etc anyway.


Kids want everything these days, have everything at their disposal yet you still hear them saying they are bored!

Christmas isnt even special anymore i have heard parents say as children get everything all year round!

kids are so demanding why dont they wait till they earn their own money if they want the latest this and that!

I am sure your oh wasnt harmed by his experience at least he didnt end up a demanding spoilt brat.

He can buy the things he wants now cant he now he is earning.

juliescot

red_devil wrote: »

[
So when our kids wanted Nike instead of Asda's Ncks trainers, and Adidas instead of Tesco Two Stripes, we got them to help pay the difference. Result = happy parents and happy kids.

yes but you made a rod for your own back. Who wants to be a walking advert for Nike etc anyway. Tiger Woods doesn't seem to mind


Kids want everything these days, have everything at their disposal yet you still hear them saying they are bored!

Christmas isnt even special anymore i have heard parents say as children get everything all year round! Well no child of mine gets things all year round. Although I am not a big fan of Xmas

kids are so demanding why dont they wait till they earn their own money if they want the latest this and that! Because that would not ever work.

I am sure your oh wasnt harmed by his experience at least he didnt end up a demanding spoilt brat.

He can buy the things he wants now cant he now he is earning. Just because you are earning money does not mean you can buy the things you want

Seems a blinkered view of life and the world as it really is, but if it works for you and your family then go for it.

ifonlyitwaseasier

Ok before this descends into more of a slanging match remember martin says " be nice to all money savers" and in this instance although the op's daughter hasn't saved, she'll sure learn how from now on!

OP i think you are doing the right thing, good luck!

Alikay

red_devil wrote: »

I am sure your oh wasnt harmed by his experience at least he didnt end up a demanding spoilt brat.

He can buy the things he wants now cant he now he is earning.

In fact, he WAS harmed by his cold upbringing and the fact that his parents refused to meet any but his most basic needs. Yes, he could buy himself a Scalextric and a bike now, but they'd have brought him a lot of pleasure when he was 9, not mid 40's. j

I'm sorry that the children you meet seem to be so demanding yet bored. Mine arent. Most of the kids I meet who I'd describe as spoilt are spoiled by not having any boundaries regarding their behaviour rather than being bought trendy gear (branded or otherwise - these days I'm lead to believe that obvious branding is passe). The OP clearly does have boundaries for her kids and sanctions for when boundaries are breached: Hence her question on apt punishment and repayment.

FabuLass

Please don't argue people.......

just so as you know the reason my dd got the phone was because she wanted a contract for Christmas last year, my son wanted an x-box so we took a deal with o2 which gave us both of those plus a nice phone and that meant we got to pay it up at £29 per month for the length of the contract (18mths) if you see what I mean...now although that mounts up to be a lot of money over the term it was the way for us to get what we wanted for the kids....and they really aren't spoiled at all.

So you see my daughter has had the phone for almost a year and has never gone over her minutes before.

red_devil

juliescot wrote: »

Seems a blinkered view of life and the world as it really is, but if it works for you and your family then go for it.

Tiger woods gets paid to wear clothing etc.

Looking like a walking advert as a child looks tacky and you are just lining the pockets of the company like Nike. Who wants to look the same as everyone else either!

lots of children do get things all year round. I have seen people say on parenting forums that their child gets something every time they go to the shop!:rolleyes:

The amount children generally get at Christmas has increased! People on parenting sites actually list their presents and say have i got enough! You can see that along with all the presents the kids will get from other relatives its far too much, and they will probably be overwhelmed! later on in the day they will be no doubt bored as well or things will be broken.:rolleyes: How many remember what they got last Christmas as well.

It would work if parents were stronger! How on earth does a parent afford everything for the home, everything they need, bills, food, and phones for the kids etc! Why should a child have a mobile phone and expect the parents to top it up! Where does all the money come from!

It dosent mean he can buy what he wants true but its his money now! He can make the choice! When your parents pay they decide!

I didnt say this was the way it was for my family. I think i give an accurate view of how out of hand its all got with kids demanding this and that all the time and putting untold pressure on the parents all the time!

Christmas meaning has also become somewhat lost with kids writing their expensive xmas lists and people having to go on forums and ask is this enough! Then next year of course you have to go one better and get more!

How can they not see that buying loads of gifts dosent equal happiness.

I do love it when i see a post saying what can i get Freddy for xmas he has everything? Well dont get him anything then! Buy something for a child who hasnt got anything or sponsor a child in another country or a dog that needs a home etc!

afk25

I am glad to hear OP that you have made a decision right for you and your daughter. I have found out today that my mobile has a credit limit, which they gave me without request :rotfl: Its with Virgin and its still a lot at £125 per month, I never use up my allowance or go anywhere near that figure! But like the others I didn't think companies still did this. It maybe worth knowing for your future reference if you still want a contract - they may even lower that limit if asked.:j

teambathmat

Any idea who she was chatting to late at night?, I would be concerned about that.