Benefit cheat - but family member - help?

Sarahlou_2

Hi,

I'm in a bit of a dilemma.....I have two SILs (Hubbys sisters). SIL 1 (21 years old)is a single parent to a 4 year old, lives on her own (although still gets her backside wiped by MIL and FIL....). She does not work and gets her rent paid and various other benefits. She has no inclination to work. She seriously lets hard working single mums down.....many ladies on here would seriously put her to shame :mad:

The other SIL pays her £50 a week in cash to look after her daughter (2 years old). Everyone in the family justifies this by saying "well X couldn't manage on benefits otherwise".

I was chatting to SIL 1 the other day about why doesnt she look for a part time job maybe now her son is going to school, to get her out of the house and give her a bit of adult conversation, when SIL 2 butted in, went mad and said "don't say that. I wont have a childminder then". I hasten to add, SIL 1 does nothing with the children and sits on her !!!! all day, watching TV, both children are very behind speech wise etc IMO.

I don't know why but this really wound me up. Maybe its because we both work, maybe because we have paid a lot for good quality childcare in the past, who knows! SIL2 is always gloating about materialistic things she has and doesn't understand that because we are honest people, we have to make sacrifices in our lives!

I keep seeing more and more "report a benefit thief" adverts and it makes me so tempted. But am I being harsh???????? What would you guys do? Report them or turn a blind eye???

Sweetpeanut

Some one will eventually report her, don't put yourself in that position you might be not able to live with yourself, they always get caught one way or another.

Sarahlou_2

Thanks Sweetpeanut - that's a really good point.

sneggy

hi sarah how would your hubby feel??? mine wouldnt be happy if it were his sister

ailuro2

Well if you're happy to work hard and pay taxes to keep your SIL on her backside watching Jeremy Kyle of a morning while your nieces and nephews brains rot, then fine, I don't see where the dilemma is...but if you think it's wrong, simply report her anonymously, when anyone in the family mentions it pretend you were on her side the "Oh dear that's terrible, how will she pay the money back" type questions. And comments about 'there's always a sneaky curtain twitcher watching what's going on, can't see anyone getting a little extra' will also mean they don't think it's you.

I'm not saying it's easy, but you're obviously having a hard time watching them cheat the system!

janninew

Thats a difficult one!
I would be tempted to report them, but you do have to think how your husband would react?

ailuro2

janninew wrote: »

Thats a difficult one!
I would be tempted to report them, but you do have to think how your husband would react?

You don't have to tell your husband it was you, do you?:p

System

I'm a bit confused, is she actually committing benefit fraud?? I'm guessing its about the £50 she's getting paid by the other SIL?

ailuro2

earning money and not declaring to benefits agency is fraud.

Taking money for looking after a child while not being registered is dodgy too.;)

System

ailuro2 wrote: »

earning money and not declaring to benefits agency is fraud.

Taking money for looking after a child while not being registered is dodgy too.;)

Thanks for clearing that up,Thought it was that, brain cells aren't working at full capacity today

Mojisola

Sweetpeanut wrote: »

Some one will eventually report her, don't put yourself in that position you might be not able to live with yourself, they always get caught one way or another.

Unfortunately this isn't true. There are some families who only know this way of life because the parents haven't been caught and all the children know is how to work the system.

I would do it just in the hope that the children will get into some proper childcare.

ailuro2's advice is good but don't use your own phone, just in case. Information does sometimes get passed around when it shouldn't.