Do I expect too much from children

sooz

They are never too young to start helping

I like the baby mop

milliebear00001

delain wrote: »

I try to get my now 7 year old daughter to learn about tidying up, but i get vilified by my family who seem to think i should wait on her hand and foot! She has 5 year old twin sisters and they are better at doing their little 'jobs'.:o

I am sick of being painted as some kind of monster because i don't think its out of order for her to take the clothes i washed and folded for her and put them away in her room.

Or to understand that if she wants to go out and play or watch TV downstairs (no TV's in bedrooms) her room should be tidy first.

Does anyone else think that adds up to terrible parenting?

If there were more parents like you, I'd be a happier teacher! LOTS of children come into school expecting somebody else to pick up after them/fasten their coat/wipe their nose/tie their shoes/give them a pen or pencil/PE kit cos they forgot theirs.

You are absolutely right in teaching her a wider, and very important, lesson in personal responsibility.

delain

It was my mum who gets upset - which seems a bit rich to me really, as we were on the at risk register for years because of her ex-BF and when i was 11 she tried to set the house on fire when we were all inside:rolleyes:

to this day i'd take stability over not having to tidy my room

MandyLou66

Totally agree with children having chores, it does make them more capable adults. My 2 always had to lay the table for Sunday Lunch, I now work in a Hotel and am amazed at how many of the young part-time wait staff can't even set a table!

Threebabes

Mine do bits and bobs, my 13 & 9 yr old empty dishwasher. All 3 kids incl. my 5 yr are expected to hang wet towels up, tidy room, but washing in basket. My two girls like to bring washing in and polish. Not mean at all, just sensible.

galvanizersbaby

sooz wrote: »

They are never too young to start helping

I like the baby mop

Like your style Sooz - and he is gorgeous!

sooz

he is!
But he's not mine, he's the advertising baby for the actual product
I think they also do a 4 sock version for cats :rotfl:

Mine are upstairs tidying their bedrooms with the promise that anything left on the floor will go into the big black bin bag. It's amazing the powers of that bin bag

jellyhead

delain wrote: »

It was my mum who gets upset - which seems a bit rich to me really, as we were on the at risk register for years because of her ex-BF and when i was 11 she tried to set the house on fire when we were all inside:rolleyes:

to this day i'd take stability over not having to tidy my room

Do all grannies do this - going overboard to spoil the grandchildren in ways they did not or could not spoil their own children?

My mum gets annoyed with me if I don't buy my eldest new uniform every September - even though the uniform he has might have only been worn for a month or so during the previous year, fits and is in good condition.

She often goes out to buy him new clothes, just cheap supermarket clothes like I buy, but she likes him to have 'new' things and not 'go without' which is what I suppose we did. We were really poor, my parents were teens and dad was on an apprenticeship and very badly paid. Benefits weren't top-up back then, so if benefits were £100 but you earned £10 they didn't give you any benefit or pay your rent.

I can remember once that Mum bought me a new blouse for a school concert - it was brand new in the packet, and I'd never had anything new before, so that sticks in my mind. I think my gran provided the money for it. Everything came from oxfam shops or hand-me-down from other kids. I assume knickers were bought new, I can't remember. Shoes were from the cheap shop opposite Clarks. We were sometimes hungry, and there were no treats. I can remember my uncle buying us a chocolate bar from the shop, and my aunt buying us a little bottle of fizzy pop - we only had them once a year at the sunday school christmas party usually.

I don't mean that we were actually starving, of course not - but other kids could eat wagon wheels or get a 10p mix from the shop whereas if we wanted a snack outside of meal times it had to be toast. The lady next door gave us the dripping off her sunday roast.

So, my mum tries to give my children sweets and chocolate at every opportunity, makes sure they have junk food for breaktime at school and she buys t-shirts and school uniform, even a coat for school the previous 2 years. She loves to buy them new clothes, because we never had them (and she reckons the prices are even cheaper!).

jellyhead

Sorry, that was a bit of a ramble! There's another granny I know who neglected her children when they were kids. She was an alcoholic and often spent all the money on alcohol and then would send them to my mum's door to beg for a tin of beans. She now childminds her grandson full time, babysits and buys things for him - she does everything she can to 'make up for' the childhood she gave her own daughter, despite ill health (not connected to her former drinking).

galvanizersbaby

sooz wrote: »

he is!
But he's not mine, he's the advertising baby for the actual product
I think they also do a 4 sock version for cats :rotfl:

Mine are upstairs tidying their bedrooms with the promise that anything left on the floor will go into the big black bin bag. It's amazing the powers of that bin bag

OMG! you mean there actually is a baby mop :rotfl: