Alcohol self help thread II

kazmac_3

Think I'm having an 'anyhow' day...feeling a bit low though don't lnow why?? OH at work, dd school, ds work...hmmmm
Thought I'd feel on top of the world now oh understanding more..
I hate this bloody illness :mad: : I KNOW that if I have a drink it'll make me feel even crappier and tomorrow I'll feel as guilty as if I've murdered someone, but I am STILL agonisingly tempted today....this sounds really stupid but now Ive done the housework, Im thinking...well, youve done your bit, shepherds pie ready for later, house clean, HALF of ironing done, so you deserve it...please tell me someone else has felt like this....almost like i should give myself a reward...but why does it always seem a punishment too...like a double-edged sword?

micheleen

kazmac wrote:

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!{rushes to get broom................!

Is that for or though

micheleen

You'll get low days kaz, thing is to try and stop them getting you so low you think why bother. Have a :grouphug: to help you

kazmac_3

micheleen wrote:

Is that for or though

u are sooo daft mich! But have made me

harrie_2

hi mich :j

micheleen

Hi shirl :grouphug:

you eating ok today ?

iwanttosave_2

grex wrote:

Sitting typing this, i'm aware that no less than twenty feet away in my own flat, there are at least 40 litres of spirits and liquers. I dunno, I guess i'm just looking for some reassurance that i won't "inherit" the same problems that my forebears have had.

Sorry for buttng in guys but just wanted to comment.

Hi Grex, I just realy wanted to reassure you, I myself come from family of drinkers, my nana was a full blown alcoholic when I was little (she managed to give up years before she died though) and my mum once she met my stepdad also became a drinker, I wouldnt say she was an alcoholic in the normal sense of the word but was a massive binge drinker, she would sometimes go out every night of the week drinking with him, and certainly wouldnt miss a friday to sunday, leaving me to practically raise my brother when I was 11, even now she would go out at about 5pm and take my brother (I moved out and refused to care for him hoping it might change them) with them to the pub and would often not get back till the very early hours of the morning. They would stay in the pub with my brother (he is 10 now) till about 11 or 12 at night then go on to a friends to carry on drinking. They got themselves into a lot of debt so they could go out, I suppose looking at it now I have wrote it, I am wondering if there was a major problem. But like I said they would do this everyweeked without fail and if they couldnt they would drink in the house. They have moved to spain now, my mum works in a bar and will no doubt be drinking as will my step dad.

Now the whole point of that is to tell you about me, I dont know if their actions had an impact on me or what but I very rarely drink, I have drank about 2 bottles of reef in about 3 months, the last time I was even close to tipsy was new year. With all this in mind I dont think that people do inherit alcoholic tendancys, I think its down to the person themselves and how they view alcohol. I hate it, its what made my brother have a sh1tty upbringing, nearly every memory I have from about the age of 9 and above was in a pub my mum and SD being drunk, I now pretty much resent her for all her actions and I think my brother will do as well when he grows up. You need to say to yourself that you dont want to end up like that, that you can see past the drink and just leave it where it is. You say that you dont have a need to drink so that shows there is no adiction (so far) so long as you have the ability to see that then you will be fine and would just be a case of cutting back.

Oooops looks like I had a few demons myself

Thanks

Al_Mac

kazmac wrote:

Think I'm having an 'anyhow' day...feeling a bit low though don't lnow why?? OH at work, dd school, ds work...hmmmm
Thought I'd feel on top of the world now oh understanding more..
I hate this bloody illness :mad: : I KNOW that if I have a drink it'll make me feel even crappier and tomorrow I'll feel as guilty as if I've murdered someone, but I am STILL agonisingly tempted today....this sounds really stupid but now Ive done the housework, Im thinking...well, youve done your bit, shepherds pie ready for later, house clean, HALF of ironing done, so you deserve it...please tell me someone else has felt like this....almost like i should give myself a reward...but why does it always seem a punishment too...like a double-edged sword?

All the time hun, nothing to do.........

I need a hobby, everyone agrees.

micheleen

I've felt like that as well kaz, lots of times. Try not to think of having a drink as a reward.

Hi wanty :wave:

kazmac_3

Tyvm mich & al....

Am still sitting here looking at the ironing board, but dont think that's going to get the job done

I have tried everything today lol, probably my worst day so far, feel so angry, resentful and all of that at myself! I resented everyone who didn't work BH weekend thats around me because I knew they'd be out enjoying themselves. Now it's my 'weekend-(days off)'. I feel like I deserve it too. Yet I'm sitting here agin on my bloody own....christ I sound selfish! Sorry guys