Alcohol self help thread II

ac

im been sitting here thinking wot the hell was wrong with me
on the 23rd... couldnt remember...

due to the second bit of news i got :rolleyes: ...

o yeah now i remember..........

im back to my normal character defects..

blameing myself....
looking for things that arnt there in wot hes said
to me....
hearing things wrongly
full of resentment and anger....
self pity

i cant handle emotions... and i no wot will take this pain away....

but i also no thats not the answer, and the problem will still
be there, (even worse), if i wake up from a binge... i no if i start
again i wont stop or even wake up.......
its scarry how much of agrip this illness has

i no i wont make it back if i start to drink again..
and quite frankly i wont want to come
back through hell again xxxxx

Edinburghlass_2

Take this step by step ac as you did the alcohol.

Why is he telling you now?

Do you believe him when he says its finished?

Do you care?

He had the "power" when you were drinking, is this happening now because he no longer has the "power"?

What/how do you see your future with your OH?

The only thing that will take the pain away will be dealing with the problems, drinking them away won't help but you know that now.

feelinggood_2

Well done on staying strong AC, this must be a horrible time for you.
For me, it feels like drinking will take the pain away, but it doesn't. The only way to go is thru the pain, nothing can make it any better.
Hope you are doing ok
xx

Edinburghlass_2

Daughter brought home some work on a peom about Marilyn Monroe.

This is a few lines from it which I thought pertinent.

"All I had was my life.
I have no regrets because if I made any mistakes,
I was responsible.
There is now
And there is the future.
What has happened is behind,
So it follows you around?
So what?

feelinggood_2

Why are things sent to challenge us? Was doing alright, feel like packing it all in at the moment.
Relationship troubles are bad enough, now just found out credit card has be compromised - about £300 already gone

Trying to work out what to do, home alone so there is no one to stop me. Just trying to find some will power from somewhere to overcome this.

Al_Mac

Keep going hun, one day at a time Where's hublet tonight?

feelinggood_2

He's at the gym. Hoping he'll be back soon, isn't a good idea to be home alone with several bottles of voddie about :rotfl:
I can beat this, it just hurts a bit
Hows you?

feelinggood_2

Well, I did it.
Manage 7 days like I said I would. Thought I wouldn't drink anymore, but sat in the pub last night, I could resist one. That one turned out to be a mad drinking session with 3 guys that went on untill 4:30am this morning.
I'm still drunk now, sobered up enough to start wondering about why I did it?
No easy answers I guess - this time I can't blame the 'I'm unhappy' thing, I was happy and did genuinely enjoy it. Just feel a bit like poo now!
No fun being drunk at 10am!
Hope you guys are all well and good

Al_Mac

Well done on hitting your target. Was the target the problem. Done that, so get drunk?

feelinggood_2

Al_Mac wrote:

Well done on hitting your target. Was the target the problem. Done that, so get drunk?

Subconsiously it might have been. But I think the reason why I set a one week target as opposed to anything else is that I knew I was going to get drunk. I'm a very social drink, awful really. I've got an amazing ability to egg people on into keeping up to me, which isn't very good seeing as I put away a bottle of amaretto and a bottle of tia maria last night.
Didn't see if as a reward as such, I just really find it hard to turn down a drink.