The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 4

Tosh1

Hey, I've been alcohol free for four months now!

Mind you it did take the help of Alcoholics Anonymous to help me find the right path and I wish I did it years ago.

I reckon I've 'saved' (I've just spent the money on nicer things; like bills and stuff) nearly £2000 maybe more, from money not spent on booze and time spent working when normally I'd be drinking (I'm self emp).

So I just thought I'd tip my hat and suggest AA is a great place if you think you have a 'drinking problem'.

Regards,

Tosh

Pippilongstocking

yellowmonkey wrote: »

Arent they supposed to be green fingers NOT green thumbs - I love it though well done YM on the ericaceous compost!!

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:Well I am meal planning tonight and setting the house straight - just wrote down the entire contents of the freezer (EDIBLE and NON-EDIBLE:rotfl:) and will make a list.

Need to get back into the swing of NOT being on holiday and NOT shopping and NOT drinking.

Drinks - um fizzy water - or decaf coffee and I do love a herbal tea.

Hope you are all good gang. Currently sorting out me phone as well.....ho hum .......keeping these idle hands busy.

ForeverHopeful_3

Idle hands, idle hands, I sit twiddling my thumbs.....

Not true actually, because I've got the boys to bath and bed. I have a few items ending on Ebay tonight too, so I'll be watching that. There's The Street to watch on telly.

I ate with the kids, so haven't touched the wine yet. Of course it is calling me incessantly. But I feel quite strong for a change. Much better than this afternoon :j

Much love X

gargrave50

Well done foreverhopeful, I too have a bottle of wine calling my name from the fridge.

I am going to hoover the lounge, bath and bed my son. Then settle down to a cup of tea and a toffee crisp biscuit.

yellowmonkey

Stay strong

My bells were ringing really hard at 2:30 but rode that out and just had Jam Roly Poly and Custard for pudding.

Loverly. Would not have had if I was on the beer as it would take up valuble space in my Tummy.

Put me down for 5 please Miss P. No beer will pass this way today :cool:

ym

Pippilongstocking

Indeed stay strong - or fill yourselves up with jam roly poly and custard - yum yum - ell done YM - bells clanging here - 2nd cup of coffee - I may need to resort to gardening in my pj's



Currently sorting out the 'present box'.

Pagan71

tangochick wrote: »

It was my husbands funeral on friday ...

Dear Tangochick, my thoughts have been with you for most of the day. I read your post this morning before I went to work but didn't have time to reply.

You are such a brave, caring person to take the time to share your heartwrenching experience with us all. I'm pretty sure that your post has touched everyone on this forum and I do hope that it maybe enough to help the struggling amongst us to give up the poison for good.

As you said, unfortunately your husband never admitted he had a problem. He probably had a suspicion, but alcoholics know if they admit to it, it's like it makes it REAL and they'll have to stop drinking - which is the very last thing they want!

For years I have suspected I have a problem, I even went to an alcohol advice place about 10 years back, but then promptly buried my head in the sand again.

I think alcoholism is an illness similar (and often tied in with depression) in that you only realise how bad the problem is/was when it no longer affects you. I only seriously began to consider myself an alcoholic when I managed to give it up for 6 months - it's amazing what you see when the haze clears!

Unfortunately, I thought I could become a social drinker again and be normal, but it just doesn't work like that for me. Slowly my drinking increased until I was having to battle with myself not to drink again. This is the point I'm at again and even now I am aware that I have a social event in just over a week's time where I will drink

It's probably an alcoholic cop out but I've decided to give myself one last chance and I hereby state my rules on this forum:

1. Only drink on rare social occasions (I hardly ever go out drinking, I'm a terrible home drinker)
2. Never have 2 drink days in one week (which if I keep to rule 1 shouldn't ever happen)
3. No more than 2 drink days in one calendar month
4. No more than 4 pub measures on a designated drink day
5. No ifs or buts - if I break these rules I will have to admit I AM an alcoholic. Obviously if I can't keep to these simple rules it is quite clear and obvious, I cannot deny it any longer :eek:

The consequence of breaking ANY of these rules will be the ultimate penance of life-long abstinence, therefore there is a lot riding on this challenge! I haven't had alcohol since last Wednesday after 3 days of drinking vodka and I intend to drink none until my upcoming social event. Even though I currently am managing to get through the evenings with only minor cravings and supermarket shopping trips with moderate head-wrangles I know my real tester will be my night out and the following week.

Wish me luck! <gulp>

Pagan

fedupandskint

just popping on to say I am AF tonight making it 9 days now, sat here with a poorly stomach which I have had all day

WASHER

tangochick wrote: »

Hello, I'm lurking here, keeping an eye on you lot. I'm so glad you're trying to beat this.

It was my husbands funeral on friday, loads of friends & family, all shocked & sad.
Many feeling guilty & going round & round in circles like i have wondering, what could we have done? when did it start? why did it start? why didnt he talk to them about it? His mum feels guilty cos she gave him money, his sibling cos she's a doctor & should've noticed, his mates cos they all drank together.... so many victims.
At 40, he was the first of his friends to die, so school & college friends came from all over, including Australia, Bali & Canada, what a shame he wasnt here to see them.
Many apologised to me for not taking me seriously when i'd asked for help, its nobodys fault, he told them i was just nagging & exaggerating & he had become an excellent liar.

My 2 little boys (age 2 & 4) were adorable, they placed some red roses on the coffin & asked lots of strange questions, where is daddy? Has he got a pillow? How did he get up there?
It shouldnt have happened, its such a waste. I want to shout it from the rooftops ! WHAT A WASTE !
I feel so angry, so sad, i can't quite believe it then i think of him laughing with the kids & its gut wrenching.
Good Luck to all of you, you've done the hardest bit acknowledging a problem. even the week before he went into hospital, he wouldnt admit it.
x

my previous post.......
My husband died last friday, aged 40 leaving me (his wife) and his 2 children under 5.
He was a kind & loving man, until last year he was a wonderful husband and daddy.
I dont know exactly when his drinking got out of hand, he hid it well. I would say only 18months to 2 years ago, although we've both always liked a drink.
He was unlucky, his body couldnt handle it, he was built like a rugby player & was strong, he never got ill, if anyone could handle it- people thought he could.

Alcoholism is a shocking illness & i am sorry it affects so many people.
I knew nothing about it until last year & was so ignorant, i didnt understand why my husband couldnt just stop.
His biggest problem was denial, he convinced himself that he was fine, not even taking notice of doctors. He hadnt really accepted that he had a problem, even tho blood tests & liver specialist had said he should stop.

He would be devastated if he had known this would happen, he loved his kids so much, his personality just went.
He went into hospital with alcoholic hepatitus 4 wks before his death,
he was walking & talking, and within a few wks he couldnt, he was extremely ill and jaundiced and scared.

if you know anyone who has a problem with drink, please tell them this from me and urge them to get help before its too late.
My husband will have so many people at his funeral who loved him, yet none of us could help him.
Be strong.
It is a terrible illness.
xx

My heartless felt sympathy goes out to you and your wee boys.

.x.

glasgowgirl

Evening,

Tangochick - my heart goes out to you and your children. Thanks for posting at this difficult time.

Fay and fellow AF-ers - I'm on the wagon with you tonight. Have sort of cheated in that I've had 1 AF Becks. On the coffee now. Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo wish I'd bought some cake or chocolate.

xx