The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

lisawood78

Hi Tea. We are in Nuneaton and had my first 4 IVFs at Walsgrave (as was) CRM.
They used a 'one size fits all' treatment plan with us which is fine for a lot of folks but we have some unusual treatment quirks so went elsewhere so they could actually tailor treatment to our needs.
We also had a few issues getting our notes off them (took three months to get them transferred)
We moved to Midland Fertility Services in Walsall (I know this is probably further than you would like to travel as it takes us an hour to get there) and the difference in the clinic is amazing. They treat everyone as an individual and listen to your needs and concerns and just has a much more 'private' feel rather than an IVF conveyor belt.
I guess what i'm saying is that we also had problems with CRM and although it is a pain it is worth changing clinics til you find one you are happy with as it can make all the difference in the world, even if it is a massive nuiscance.
Good luck x

tea_lover

Thanks Lisa. I totally agree that you need to be happy with the clinic, and I'm just not happy with Walsgrave. The parking alone is enough to put anyone off! I've not been fully comfortable with them since the cancelled cycle and various other issues (eg. telling me I didn't have OHSS when I was so ill I thought I was dying, then sending me a letter a few weeks later saying that actually I did). I just don't feel confident that our best chance of success lies with them.

The next nearest to us is CARE in Northampton. But that's nearly an hour away (especially at the times of day we'd probably be going over there). Does anyone have any experience of going there? Or other CARE clinics?

Have just sent them an email asking for some basic information so I'll see what they come back with.

Derby2

Hi Tea,

I'm going to CARE Nottingham, and one of the reasons I chose it over Nurture was that it was slightly out of the city centre and 'should' be easier to get to. I do work in Nottingham though and if I'm honest, I wouldn't have thought it would be any better for you to get to than Northampton because there are a lot of roadworks around here at the moment and it's a beast to get in and out.

I do agree with Lisa though-if you're not happy, it would be worth changing. It's a heck of a lot of money to spend and if they aren't providing the level of service, it's time to move on.

vseviour-huge, huge congratulations! What a lot of good news we're having on the TTC veterans thread! Have a happy and healthy 9 months!

AFM...we've got our first consultation at CARE next Monday with an AFC (again) and my OH's SA (again), and I've booked us in for the open evening next week too. I have to say that straight away I found CARE Nottingham better to deal with than CARE Derby. It was like pulling teeth trying to get through to Derby and get information. Unless you asked the exact question, they would not offer up any info. The first time I spoke to CARE, she straight away went through what to expect with appointments and the timescales and I didn't even need to ask! Very impressed so far...and a little bit giddy!

lisawood78

Oh the parking!!!!
Crikey.
UHCW the actual hospital is very good, I've been in the Gynae A&E area a few too many times sadly but it is fabulous with the service it provides etc but the CRM section just doesn't live up to expectations for me at least.
Saying that however when we were looking at moving clinics we went to ARGC in London for a consultation just to see if it was worth it. All I can say is, it really wasn't!! That place was hell. So keep looking til you find where you are really happy and comfortable, you will know when you find it x

SewIt_2

MrsHappy & Vseviour - massive congratulations! So nice to get some lovely news on here for a change. I think you'll still get a 6.5/7 week scan Mrs H as I don't think they can actually see much before then, that's what I was told anyway.

Tea - I'd seriously consider researching new clinics. You need to be totally confident in your clinic and the care you are receiving. I know its a pain, but you might only be at the clinic 6 times. Worth a think, esp as you are paying and your window for egg share is getting shorter.

PM & MrsDavo, I'm not a good dancer, but I'll join in the eggy dance none the less. Wishing you both lots of egg luck!

Re telling people, I told no one (not even my best friend who I knew had been through IVF). I'm not sure why TBH, it just felt really private and personal. Since the failed IVF we've told a few people, but now I'm a bit worried that they will expect access to all the gory details so to speak, so I'm wanting to close in again. I don't think that its taboo, its just that I don't want to share my journey until I know where its going, if that makes sense. Friends and family will know one day, just not today. Everyone is different though!

Does anyone feel like the whole infertility thing can be a total slap in the face? I thought I was doing ok, then BAM, I feel like I've been punched in the gut and everything is difficult all over again. Not sure what triggered this, but I was Angry SewIt this morning!! (happy news on here has cheered me up though!) xx

Part_Mouse

Sew it thanks I think *maybe* we had to much dancing lol

tea_lover

*kicks silver egg-dancing suits under the sofa*

Part_Mouse

lol tea.

st10

tea_lover

SewIt wrote: »

Tea - I'd seriously consider researching new clinics. You need to be totally confident in your clinic and the care you are receiving. I know its a pain, but you might only be at the clinic 6 times.

I would go anywhere if it meant I only had to go 6 times! That would be fantastic . Had about 20 appts for ICSI.

time2deal

While it's not the same Tea, I'm also having doctor rage today.

I've been having this problem of blood in the uterus now for a few months - first identified in July. Since then I have been bounced from one doctor to another for repeats of the same painful and intrusive tests. Fertility doc says they won't go ahead with IVF until it's resolved, oncologist says he doesn't think its a problem. So I am stuck.

The results are inconclusive, but I finally got the doctors to agree to talk to each other in August. It's now 24 September, and they still haven't managed to even get their secretaries to make a phone call to each other! And now the IVF doctor is on holidays again. It's a joke - I'm so frustrated, and I fully understand Tea why you end up crying. It just feels so completely out of your hands, and its like they simply can't comprehend why endless waiting around may be frustrating.

We have been waiting since July (at least) to know the plan, and have been delaying and delaying a holiday which we both desperately need. Only to find out that while I'm waiting every day for a call, it's sitting at the bottom of someone to-do list.