The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

littleme82

Hi ladies, think I will for sure be joining everyone here in the next few weeks.

Am at a very low point this morning. At my desk in tears and having to lie to colleagues as to what is wrong.

Cycle 12 (#2 of clomid) has failed. AF showed this morning - 26 day cycle. I will start #3 round of clomid tomorrow at 100mg for 5 days.

I feel so down. sorry

x

tea_lover

littleme - please don't apologise for feeling rubbish. Have a massive virtual hug xx. I think we've all had those moments at work, definitely know what you're going through sweetie.

Am I right in thinking you were on 50mg for the first 2 cycles? If so, maybe the boost in dose will be just the thing you need. But I appreciate none of that is much comfor when it's CD1, you're stuck at work and pretty much hating the world.

Take care xx. There's always someone around if you need to come on and have a rant/cry. It's the only thing getting me through work most days.

good_vibes

littleme *hugs* to my clomid buddy. fingers crossed for this month for you x

chickpea

So my baby has died, we found out at the 12 week scan, it probably died around 8 or 9 weeks.

I feel like such an idiot for not knowing, I had had some spotting in weeks 8-10 but had written that off as just one of those things, especially when it tailed off and there was no cramping or any other indication. I had the odd bout of nausea and a developing bump until this week, so no reason to imagine it had died.

I was going to let nature take its course, but there is absolutely nothing happening bar a small amount of blood the day after I found out, and I can't countenance the idea of walking around in limbo with a dead baby inside me for weeks, so I am trying to organize the operation. The hospital are being worse than useless and disorganized so far. They are annoying me along the lines of 'Hello, I'd like to arrange a surgical management of miscarriage please' 'Are you pregnant then?' 'Eh, well it's dead, so I guess not..' Maybe I'm just easily annoyed at the moment.

Been getting by on valium and bourbon, but I think I'll have to knock the bourbon on the head because that's not helping my mood any.

Nicki

I am so very sorry chickpea. It's such a terrible thing to happen and all the harder with a much longed for and awaited child. Nothing anyone can say can take away the grief unfortunately but I am thinking of you. If you feel strong enough the miscarriage thread on here is very supportive. Lots of us have been through mmc and will try and support where we can

vseviour

Oh, Chickpea. I am so, so sorry x

tea_lover

Oh chickpea I am so sorry to hear that. I really hope you manage to get the surgery sorted out soon, and that the people you deal with at the hospital are better than the ones you've spoken to so far.

Thinking of you xx.

angeltreats

So sorry Chickpea. Shocking how insensitive hospital staff can be. Take care of yourself x

TeamLowe

so sorry to hear of your loss chickpea, please take good care of yourself
I echo Nicki's sentiments- the miscarriage support thread was a godsend for me when I had my mmc, especially when it came to the more practical aspects and what to expect
Be thinking of you x x

time2deal

Oh Chickpea. So sorry to hear your news... I can't imagine how hard it all is. Be kind to yourself.