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SOA advice please!!

123468

Comments

  • Flower08
    Flower08 Posts: 4,771 Forumite
    Hi,
    I think you have had some sound advice here and you just seem to have an excuse for everything. I think you really need to change your attitude before you can change your financial situation - sorry if that sounds harsh!

    First of all, take the £3.50 (or whatever it was) for the bus into town out of your rent money, im sure any reasonable person wouldnt mind - and if your mum wants to continue receiving rent off you then you need a job. Go into town and sign up to every ageny available, go in shops asks about vacancies - walk around for 9 hours if needs be - you will find something in no time!
    Biggest Loser Weight Loss: 13 / 20 lb
  • Bubbles911
    Bubbles911 Posts: 507 Forumite
    Tixy wrote: »
    But you are getting lots of help. You have been advice on how to cut down your costs and lots of advice on how to increase your income or find a job. The people on here can't find you a job you have to do that yourself. But people have given you a lot of help and direction and Bubbles has managed to find you lots of place to hand your CV in to, try not to be defeatist, some people may not be prepared to give you a job but the more places have your CV the more chance you have of finding someone who will. One thing is for sure if you stay in bed until midday and don't give out your CV to places nobody is going to come knocking on your door with a job for you.

    You have had advice - now its time for you to help yourself.

    This is what I wanted to say really but just couldnt find the words to adequatly get out what I meant.

    you may think people here are being hard on you but you are the only person that can get yourself out of this situation. We have all given suggestions and every single thing has a reason why it cant happen. My suggestion is buy a lottery ticket and pray because that is the only way you can get out of this situation without putting the work in. Although I bet you dont have the pound to do that do you. :confused:
    Cross Stitch Cafe Monthly Challenge Member No 2 :j

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  • joolsybools
    joolsybools Posts: 1,595 Forumite
    I think OP needs to get to the library and borrow some self help books.
  • charlie2517
    charlie2517 Posts: 141 Forumite
    edited 19 July 2009 at 11:56AM
    Dear OP and All,

    I read this post on Friday and had to go and make a brew as was disappointed to see so much good advice going to waste. I really do wish the OP all the best and you will get there IF you WANT to. It's about a CAN do attitude rather than a CANT DO. The most recent issue posted was the piercings, me if it was the difference between a job and cash vs no cash and jewellery in my face, I'd be taking the jewellery out (when I went to work, or if it could be taken out temporarily it'd be gone perm until I had a job where it didnt matter). If I kept having issues with my manager or getting fired I'd step back and say to myself "what is my problem?" "If it's not me and a problem with me, then I have to work, these people manage me I will get my head down bite my tongue and work my bol**cks off!!! They wont beat me, I will be the best at whatever job I do"

    There has been so much good advice posted but in the words of my grandad.."you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink"


    Charlie
    Debt: LBM = Oct 07 - £21k. DFD - [STRIKE]DEC 10[/STRIKE] [STRIKE]JUN 10 [/STRIKE] [STRIKE]MAY 10[/STRIKE] [STRIKE] MAR 10 [/STRIKE] 5th FEB 10 £0 :money:
    Now to attack the mortgage!!
    Balance at Feb 10: 185,848.89
    Current Balance:180,820.81
    MFD: July 2019
  • Bubbles911
    Bubbles911 Posts: 507 Forumite
    Charlie that is all very true. Unless you want to work in a tattoo parlour there is a point when you have to grow up and decide whether having holes in your body is more important than having enough money to have a decent life. If you have a job that is acceptable of having tattos and piercings on how then great, but the majority arent so you need to think seriously. At least take them out for interviews. I work with friends who have a lot of tattoos, yet they work because they are always covered up when they are working professionally.
    Cross Stitch Cafe Monthly Challenge Member No 2 :j

    If you enjoy cross stitch please come and join us on the special occasions board:coffee:
  • consultant31
    consultant31 Posts: 4,814 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    edited 19 July 2009 at 8:50PM
    I have reread this thread from the beginning and the OP's main problems seem to be that she overspends by a lot on her mobile phone, which is something that she can stop right here, right now! You just have to make the decision to stop wasting all that money.

    The second problem seems to be the facial piercings (which I imagine also cost a bundle).

    If I were an employer, they would put me off completely! They may be 'artistic', 'fashionable' or just a reflection of your personality, but to a casual observer, they can be intimidating and, dare I say it, revolting (that's my personal opinion and not intended to insult anyone). I would imagine very few employers would put a facially tatooed or pierced person in a 'front of house' position.

    OP you have to decide whether you want a job to earn more money, or whether you'd rather lie in bed most of the day, chatting on the phone and hoping the money will fall on you without any effort.

    Most of all, an attitude change is in order. You sound as though you are quite forthright in your views. I've worked my whole adult life and never had a row with a boss. I would bite my tongue to keep my job and sound off at home..........I don't know whether that's the right way, but keeping the job seems to be essential (especially nowadays). I don't quite know what to say about the fact that you've been banned from Amazon, eBay and shops in your local shopping centre.

    I'm sorry to be harsh, but as everyone else has already pointed out, only you can make things happen, and then only if you go after it with real enthusiasm and an open mind.
    I let my mind wander and it never came back!
  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited 19 July 2009 at 9:03PM
    Thanks so much! yeah Silverburn isn't far in the car...but i would never dream of walking there! lol I will send cv's to them all.
    The only thing i'm wondering is what kind of jobs they offer, as i have no experience of being in an office enviroment. Or much experience with computers, except going online and on msn etc. Is it all mostly office work, or are there other things too?

    I also have problems with "professional" enviroments/employers, as i am heavily tattooed and have facial piercings, which i think has been a big problem in the past at interviews. Which is why i'm asking is it all usually office based work?

    Chick you are coming across as very negative to all the suggestions, but I know you are not as I've 'spoken' to you on MSE before. ;)

    Forget what experience you don't have, look at what skills and knowledge you do have. Perhaps you need to speak to your nearest Connexions to help with identifying transferable skills. You are a student so you must use computers, are well organised, have good time management, able to communicate at different levels, work as part of a team or on your own initiative, etc.

    I have BRIGHT red hair and eight piercings and my job before last was customer-facing in an stuffy four star hotel! Life is all about compromises - wear a long sleeved white shirt and smart dark trousers for an interview to cover most tattoos, remove as many piercings as you can, replace rings with delicate studs or clear plastic retainers. A prospective employer will still notice some but a decent one will appreciate that you are serious about the job enough to 'scrub up'!
    Declutterbug-in-progress.⭐️⭐️⭐️ ⭐️⭐️
  • Fire_Fox wrote: »
    Chick you are coming across as very negative to all the suggestions, but I know you are not as I've 'spoken' to you on MSE before. ;)

    Forget what experience you don't have, look at what skills and knowledge you do have. Perhaps you need to speak to your nearest Connexions to help with identifying transferable skills. You are a student so you must use computers, are well organised, have good time management, able to communicate at different levels, work as part of a team or on your own initiative, etc.

    I have BRIGHT red hair and eight piercings and my job before last was customer-facing in an stuffy four star hotel! Life is all about compromises - wear a long sleeved white shirt and smart dark trousers for an interview to cover most tattoos, remove as many piercings as you can, replace rings with delicate studs or clear plastic retainers. A prospective employer will still notice some but a decent one will appreciate that you are serious about the job enough to 'scrub up'!

    I'm not trying to come accross as negative at all. I've just never been in this kind of position before, and don't know what to do or where to turn to.

    At the moment i work with food, so i do wear plastic retainers in my lip piercings while at work and take my plugs out my ears. And Morrisons are ok with that, but i don't know if other employers will have issues with that, as everywhere i've worked (and i have worked since i was 16, never have) But i have never had any negative expierences with my appearance, which is why i was asking. As for tattoos, mines are generally all covered by clothes anyway. Except for the ones on my hand and neck, so which again is why i was asking.

    Sorry, but i don't know what connections is, will google them once i've finished typing this though. To be honest my computer skills are minimal, yes i am a student but i have just finished college, and about to start university in September. And i am so scared about that, no one in my family, and none of my friends have been to university before. My time keeping isn't that good either, like i said i was at college an my attendance was only 56% for the whole year, so god knows how i managed to pass!

    I really am not trying to sound negative or harsh or anything like that. I know i have alot of personal problems that i need to work n, and i am trying. I mean i came here for advice, and maybe i didn't take it in the best/positive way i could.
    I think i am stuck in a bit of a rut at the moment to be honest.
  • Flower08
    Flower08 Posts: 4,771 Forumite
    Sorry, but i don't know what connections is, will google them once i've finished typing this though. .


    Connexions are really good - there to help young people in exactly your situation and help with which direction to go in next. They will help you highlight the skills you have and where they can be applied and hopefully find you a job :D definatly worth a look at!

    Good luck!!
    Biggest Loser Weight Loss: 13 / 20 lb
  • Flower08 wrote: »
    Connexions are really good - there to help young people in exactly your situation and help with which direction to go in next. They will help you highlight the skills you have and where they can be applied and hopefully find you a job :D definatly worth a look at!

    Good luck!!

    Just googled them, they are only in England, so no good to me i don't think, as i am in Scotland. Will have a look round they're website though.

    Just noticed it says on their front page for 13-19 year olds. I am 22 :(
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