gutted - he might get away with it

kelloggs36

kaya wrote: »

erm..... we dont know if she works or not, probably the taxpayer has paid for them for the last nine years! (please feel free to flame me if my assumption is wrong)

If the taxpayer had have done, then the taxpayer will be keeping the majority of the money.

PlayingHardball

CMAC wrote: »

He is required to prove he was none habitual resident but first he needs to prove he requested a change of circumstances in that he moved abroard. the fact he is back in the uk means he never really gave up his residence from my experience of First Tier Judges I dont think he has any where to go, I suspect your arreras will be safe but if you have any more problems PM me and I will refer you to a pro bona unit to help you with your appeal

CMAC, the only difference with the OP and my situation is that my ex left the country and I INFORMED THE CSA of this, not he. It is because of this that the CSA now tell me he is not liable for child support now. He has a 2 year contract to work in Europe, which I told the CSA.

It sounds like the OP will succeed with arrears through the CSA, so what is the difference with the CSA being informed by the PWC (as my situation) and not being informed at all? If a NRP are out of the country but remain ties to the UK (as in my ex with property) surely there is a legal responsibility for all NRP to pay, and if CSA can collect for the OP, surely I should fight and let them collect my arrears when Ex moves back to UK (I think this will be within a year)

If CSA refuse to help me, could I get help legally and if so, where? Meanwhile, REMO is ticking along but I understand is unlikely to be successfull. (due to the country he is in)

Kelloggs, if you have any insight to this, it would be very appreciated. I've been told different things by CSA. (PS, missed you, hope you had a good holiday)

libbyc3

blimey I've been away for couple days and whole debate started!
Update - have recieved 4 payments from CSA - £250 per month towards arrears and £220 current.
Yes, I had told my kids I would be splitting the money into 3rds and putting theirs away as the savings I have never been able to afford for them for when they leave home. This didn't go down well with DS (another thread was started about my arguements with him).
The sperm donor created merry hell (which I actually had a certain amount of sympathy for as 40% of your wages is hell of a hit)
The grief we have been getting off him - via DS (he pretends he doesn't have a DD) has not been worth the effort so I phoned the CSA and had the arrears written off for when he was out the country. He now owes about 3 grand and will have to pay current support.
As I have always been the better person (?!) I felt this gesture should put an end to the abuse that has restarted after 10 1/2 years. He doesn't know yet as I only made the call on 27th Aug.
The kids have been kept informed of my decisions and why I've made them.
And yes I am keeping every penny of the remaining arrears and spending it on shoes and handbags.

Zazen999

libbyc3 wrote: »

And yes I am keeping every penny of the remaining arrears and spending it on shoes and handbags.

Good on you.

worriedsik

Yep good for you go and have some fun to yourself
just read through this thread and was disgusted by what some poster said in regards to this single mum/parent
Without even taking into consideration the cost off bringing up children there are lots off other emotional situations involved inc being there for the kids .
I got £40 a week from my daughters dad whilst he worked away in a good job with a good pension and able to retire at 55 ! if ( and it would never have happened ) i had left my child with him he would not even be able to afford the babysitter on the £40 pw he gave me and hold on to his good job !

Yep you go and buy the shoes and handbags iam sure that spoiling yourself is long over due xx

worriedsik

ps....dont even put a Q mark next to the quote are you a better person ? it goes without saying and it will be apparent to your children too
Money cannot buy that x

Bethankim

I rarely post in here, my blood pressure cant take it

but i just wanted to say, you have been your childrens consistent parent, you have been there and your children will know it.Your DS may be a pain right now, but one day when he might be a parent he will look back and know it.

My DS is at times a pain his father is pretty rubbish in many respects - despite all the trials and tribulations when the chips are down my son knows who has been and will always be there..his mum.

there does seem to be a few who take great delght in the narrow minded,judgemental holier than thou attitude.. just hope their children, families or themselves never end up the same boat..as id be very surprised if they said the same as they type..cause if they did they may not have much of a relationship with thier loved ones...

flossy_splodge

libbyc3 wrote: »

blimey I've been away for couple days and whole debate started!
Update - have recieved 4 payments from CSA - £250 per month towards arrears and £220 current.
Yes, I had told my kids I would be splitting the money into 3rds and putting theirs away as the savings I have never been able to afford for them for when they leave home. This didn't go down well with DS (another thread was started about my arguements with him).
The sperm donor created merry hell (which I actually had a certain amount of sympathy for as 40% of your wages is hell of a hit)
The grief we have been getting off him - via DS (he pretends he doesn't have a DD) has not been worth the effort so I phoned the CSA and had the arrears written off for when he was out the country. He now owes about 3 grand and will have to pay current support.
As I have always been the better person (?!) I felt this gesture should put an end to the abuse that has restarted after 10 1/2 years. He doesn't know yet as I only made the call on 27th Aug.
The kids have been kept informed of my decisions and why I've made them.
And yes I am keeping every penny of the remaining arrears and spending it on shoes and handbags.

What a shame you've allowed yourself to be bullied out of money that was rightfully yours because that's all that's happened.
It sends the wrong message out there to other non contributing parents that cause grief for a while and you'll get away with it.
Sad. Sad for you and for your kids that that money is no longer available to any of you.:o

jen_br

I hope he appreciates what youve done.. your one hellofa mom!

woody01

worriedsik wrote: »

Yep good for you go and have some fun to yourself
just read through this thread and was disgusted by what some poster said in regards to this single mum/parent
Without even taking into consideration the cost off bringing up children there are lots off other emotional situations involved inc being there for the kids .
I got £40 a week from my daughters dad whilst he worked away in a good job with a good pension and able to retire at 55 ! if ( and it would never have happened ) i had left my child with him he would not even be able to afford the babysitter on the £40 pw he gave me and hold on to his good job !

Yep you go and buy the shoes and handbags iam sure that spoiling yourself is long over due xx

Let the 'bra buring' commence. :rolleyes:

there does seem to be a few who take great delght in the narrow minded,judgemental holier than thou attitude

Like yourself?
Lets be honest. This section of the forums is full of scorned women that profess to be amazing parents.
They always do the right thing for their kids.
Selfless in their actions.
Holier Than Thou (sound familiar) because of the above.

If this section was to help people then fair enough.
Unfortunately, most of the women on here post from a personal point of view rather than a factual one as they are so so bitter (maybe rightly so in some cases). This then completely clouds any issue they have.
Once this occurs, the 'Right On': Defenders of Women turn up and its open season.

If alot of you didn't get so:
- Emotional
- Hell bent on revenge
- Thought about your children as much as you do about money
You probably wouldn't be in this position in the first place.

flossy_splodge wrote: »

What a shame you've allowed yourself to be bullied out of money that was rightfully yours because that's all that's happened.
It sends the wrong message out there to other non contributing parents that cause grief for a while and you'll get away with it.
Sad. Sad for you and for your kids that that money is no longer available to any of you.:o

Rubbish!!!
This lady has shown that her children are more important than cash in their pocket.
She should be completely commended for this.
Yes the father should've paid more. But the mother that started this thread has taken a look at what is important and right for her family to move on.

Well done Libbyc3.
If there were more parents with genuine care for their children over money, things would be so much smoother for everyone.