Teacher assaulted my son - what to do?

[Deleted User]

bingo_babe wrote: »

it would seem that a lot of posters have taken the view that my son is some sort of thug who deserves what he got.

It would seem that a lot of posters have therefore taken the view that that is reasonable and correct

I think your ridiculous crusade is going to harm your son's prospects at that school. If the teachers know you're going to behave like this, expect them to not bother giving your child any attention. I know I'd ignore the kid with the parent who's just waiting to sue for compensation.

Nicki

bingo_babe wrote: »

Actually, my son hasn't forgotten about it. Instead he has a burning sense of injustice. I'm not sure that is a good thing - I don't want him to turn into an angry embittered young man because of this.

What more does your son want? The incident happened, you have complained to the school, and the school has investigated. It is not appropriate for a child to know what (if any) disciplinary action has been taken against a teacher, much less for him to dictate that any disciplinary action has been taken. If you are teaching your child that he has a right to know this, then you are turning him into the angry embittered young man and no one else.

If the incident happened as your son described it, and the other witnesses which the school have spoken to, support your son's story, then the head will have spoken to the teacher concerned about the incident. It is a management decision, in which you have no part, as to whether this should be done by way of informal warning or a formal disciplinary, and that will depend on the teacher's past history with the school. Neither you nor your son have any right whatsoever to know how this has been dealt with.

I am not sure what job, if any, you have, but if you work in a role which brings you into contact with the public, and were the subject of a complaint by a member of the public, or indeed a fellow colleague, would you be happy if full details of any disciplinary action against you were disclosed to the complainant. I think you would quite rightly think this is a matter between you and your boss, and the teacher is entitled to the same respect.

bestpud

SugarSpun wrote: »

I've dealt with parents who've come in furious at the way their darling, intelligent, sensitive, innocent child has been treated by the nasty staff member more than once.

In no case was the child an innocent victim. It appalls me that the parent of someone about to become an adult would be so utterly determined to ruin a teacher's career by making allegations as serious as "assault" over a clear accident.

Oh, and I don't care that my opinion isn't welcome. If you want helpful responses, the range you're getting here should be good for you. If you want sycophantic crap telling you how right you are and how brave your little boy is, perhaps you should try somewhere else. I'm guessing it would shock you to know how your son behaves when you're not there - it does most parents when we show them CCTV images of what happens when their kids are saying, I was just quietly talking to some friends.

I see what you are saying, but I do think the school has handled this situation badly.

It is wrong for a teacher to throw things around a classroom, whatever way you look at it, and they haven't been very swift to acknowledge this, or keep the OP informed.

I do think the OP is asking too much at this point, but the school should accept they've handled it badly and the teacher should be called to question over this.

Let's not forget the teacher threw a heavy object and it is not acceptable to do that! After all, we don't want pupils going into the workplace and thinking they can throw objects at colleagues in frustration, do we?

The boy and the teacher need to accept their role, and I don't think it need go further than that, but I also think it would be wrong to place 100% of the blame on either party.

smartie12

Having skimmed through this thread I'm quite surprised that alot of people think its acceptable for a teacher to throw something... whether it's aimed at a child or not

When my DS is being rude at home is it ok to throw something at him???? I wouldn't even consider it:eek: And the thought of someone else doing it:mad:

I do think that when it comes to schools and making complaints its difficult to know what to do. A letter is really the only thing to do in this situation so if it should happen again and another parent complains it is all down in writing.

Curv

bingo_babe wrote: »

Any practical advice about how to resolve this would be appreciated.

It's a very simple case of cause and effect: had your son been doing what was required of him, nothing untoward would have happened to him, either by deliberate intention or accidentally.

I suggest that the most pragmatic conclusion for this matter is that you tell your son to pay more attention in class, that if necessary you find methods of helping him to do so and that you then let the matter drop.

And before all the bleeding heart liberals jump on my back and ask if I'd do the same if it were my son, I say yes, I would.

Takoda

Well - the way I see it is

1) It was months ago - if your son takes his GCSEs next year then he only has one more year at that school then he can wend his way happily to the world of work where he will be forever protected and free from having things thrown at him as a result of his inability to concentrate on the task in front of him. However if he shows the same personality traits at work they will simply sack him!

2) If you truly believed it was an assault then you would've gone straight to the Police. Let's face it hours of Police time everyday is wasted with other trivial matters so why not add to the numbers?

3) There were a roomful of witnesses - have you asked any of his class mates what happened? Girls can usually give you a fair and unbiased view of things.

4) If you truly distrust the school /the Headteacher/the way they handle issues then move your son to another school which you like better. If he doesn't want to move then he's probably not as traumatised as YOU think. If he's disruptive the school will probably help you in this - it is called a 'managed move'.

5) Remember the way kids behave in class can be VERY different to how they are at home. Any secondary teachers out there full time in the classroom have my greatest respect. You try doing their job...

6) He's 15 not 5 so stop mollycoddling him. He's nearly an adult. This wouldn't have happened if he'd been working as he was supposed to.

Minxy_Bella

bingo_babe wrote: »

Actually, my son hasn't forgotten about it. Instead he has a burning sense of injustice. I'm not sure that is a good thing - I don't want him to turn into an angry embittered young man because of this.

If you and your son are so seriously affected by this trivial incident, you want to thank your lucky stars you haven't got any real problems!

What wonderful lives you must have! :rolleyes:

Please get this into perspective - there's fault on both sides. Nobody died or was even injured. Get over it!

bestpud

Curv wrote: »

It's a very simple case of cause and effect: had your son been doing what was required of him, nothing untoward would have happened to him, either by deliberate intention or accidentally.

I suggest that the most pragmatic conclusion for this matter is that you tell your son to pay more attention in class, that if necessary you find methods of helping him to do so and that you then let the matter drop.

And before all the bleeding heart liberals jump on my back and ask if I'd do the same if it were my son, I say yes, I would.

So, if someone was working in a communal office and getting fed up with chatting colleagues, it is ok to lob a broom at them?

It is not acceptable to throw things at others, end of!

If it were my son, I'd accept he's been very annoying and I would not involve solicitors and the like, but I would certainly raise the issue with the school.

The OP has done herself no favours in the way she has acted, but that does not make the teacher's action right!

Curv

bestpud wrote: »

So, if someone was working in a communal office and getting fed up with chatting colleagues, it is ok to lob a broom at them?

You see, this is where it all falls down: we aren't talking about adults, in an adult situation, we are talking about a child, one of millions of children, who is being taught that his rights are more important than those of every other person in his class... that his right to sit and chat with his mates, however quietly, is more important than the right of every other student to receive an education.

If only children were also being taught that with rights come responsibilities.

bingo_babe

I wonder how many of the people here who suggest that I just accept what has happened as a part of life would accept a broom head being thrown at their own child by a teacher.

I also find it odd how an assumption is made it was an accident. If an object is thrown towards a child it is entirely foreseeable that it would hit them isn't it?

If I were to be shown the evidence that the school are in possession of, then an objective conclusion could be drawn. I have been given nothing and this heightens my suspicions that there has been a cover up.

A primary school headteacher has told me she would have dealt with the teacher in accordance with the disciplinary code. What gives the teacher to behave in such an unprofessional and reckless manner and expect not to be held accountable for this? What gives the head the right to withhold the information that I, as a parent am legally entitled to?