pammyj74's MFW diary (or possible wishful thinking!!)

pammyj74

well feel ok today so the lots of walking we have been doing has paid off Had 10 hours sleep last night, must have needed it.

Kids have gone to their dads so am freeee. going to spend the day in the garden I think, but havent decided on manual labour (weeding) or thinking labour (studying)

have done a newvista survey this morning so thats £3
onepoll - nothing at the moment

Have just been out in the garden and forgot to water my seedlings yesterday and some have wilted Hope they can recover

Have checked quidco and will get £30 paid out this month :j

pammyj74

well have done the weeding and got the blisters and sunburn to prove it!
I am really annoyed as my seeldings in the cold frame are wilting from the heat! I was really looking forward to the kids having some sunflowers this year Have cut back one of my huge bushes :cool: as I remembered there is a begonia under there and sure enough it was growing back (even under the bush!) so hope that flowers this year

The only thing I dont like when the kids are not here is just getting dinner for myself, its wierd to cook for one! I can smell everyones bbqs and hear them all having fun with friends and family etc.
I know I love having some peace and quiet when the kids go so cant complain really.

wantabetterlife

Well done on the gardening Pammy, its great to get a few hours me time when the kids are away . Im afraid i didnt venture too far from the sun lounger all day.....

pammyj74

Sunday

my challenges for this week are:

The usual:

Try ALL surveys - 2 sent, 1 accepted. onepoll - none
Send all ebay items as soon as payment recieved. - none needed today
Do 3 dooyoo reviews - 3 done yay
Do 5 hours of study 1.5 hours study so far

have done really bad on the study front and have no excuse other than been really tired.
I am off tomorrow and plan to do about 3 hours study. If I dont then you have permission to kick me up the a$$

pammyj74

well its nearly a month to go before our week in Turkey so need to do a list of things I still need to get for it. It is mostly clothes I think, will add more to the list when I remember them

DD - trainers
DS2 - shorts
sun cream doneand aftersun
kids activities for travel
get holiday money
rubber ring done

I am sure there are more!

Leigh-Anne_60

oohhh holiday time, how exciting!! Which part of Turkey are you going? We are at 11 weeks in our countdown before our 3 weeks in Marmaris!! Cant wait..... And its AI, so can still do my MS bit, with complete ease!! haha

pammyj74

3 weeks!!! you lucky moo! we could only go for a week this time, we are going to Torba, never been Turkey before. Then again after 10 days I have had enough but 7 days is not enough lol.
we are going AI, would never go anything else now. I have my virtual savings pot which has nearly £300 in it but will only take £200 (maybe £250) so the kids have the experiences of things they want to do.

pammyj74

today I have managed

• 2 hours study (my sis called for an hour!! to discuss our wayward teenage sons)
• have got ready 5 ebay item (only making about £1 an item but they are quite quick to get ready)
• Tried 4 surveys, 2 accepted, onepoll - 20p
• Have ret-rated dooyoo.
• Have got the kids new passport photos and need to get my boss to sign them tomorrow and get them sent off. Could not believe that was £8 :eek: for 2 lots! shocking.

considering I have had the day off this doesnt seem a lot.

pammyj74

Feeling rubbish again today. Why are my kids dads complete and utter tosspots! I just do not understand why a dad does not want to spend time with their kids. He will try and get out of it as much as he possibly can or drop them back half an hour earlier than expected as if he cant get rid of them quick enough. It completely frustrates the hell out of me.
On saturday as we went to London and it was his weekend to have them overnight ( a measley few hours either side - not a full 24 hours oh no, cant do that!) so he had them a few hours sunday instead. so my DD asked him if he they could stay over this weekend instead or two nights on the next weekend to make up for the loss of this weekend. He said he has to work (always his excuse but he lives on a main road and I can see his car at home, have caught him out a few times there) and his then answer to that is that he wants a break sometimes at home without the kids there. did I mention that he only has them a few hours a week!

So then he says that he is not going to have them any extra as it wasnt his fault that he didnt have them saturday. NO it was mine for taking them on a dayout that unfortunately coincided with his night. How dare I do something nice for my kids. you would think any civil father would say thats ok I'll have them this weekend! The kids got quite upset. I imagine they feel a bit second rate where he is concerned. My DD the other day said he wouldnt win father of the year just out of the blue when something was on the TV about dads.

I just cannot believe a father could be like that, but he turns it around that I am always trying to palm them off on him. err hello once a fortnight sleepover and the other weekend just for tea is not exactly palming them off I dont think. I do everything on my own, he doesnt help with anything nor does anyone else help me.

I am just trying to fight a losing battle. He will never change and I do think that his wife is behind it as well as she doesnt want his kids there.

To top all this my eldest son is spending more and more time at his dads so completely the opposite, he has more friends there and goes to school there anyway, he is 16 and says he has a social life now and doesnt want to miss out but its hard to let go. I am just an emotional wreck at the moment.

I am also just really tired all the time and I dont know what is up with me.

why can't life just be simple

gallygirl

:grouphug:dodgy hug for you Pammy. You are doing the right thing by encouraging the relationship with their dads, although I appreciate it is hard in both instances for different reasons. Rise above it & your kids will thank you in years to come.

gg x