Can I evict my Mum?

Belinda_W

supergrand wrote: »

i cant beleive what im hearing here! some one genuinely asking for help and advice, otherwise why would he post in the first place? and all he gets is people slagging him off, calling him a theif his wife a granny batterer and not fit to look after 3 adopted children. come on folks get a grip, this has gone way too far! if youve nothing helpful or constructive to say then DONT SAY ANYTHING!! good luck IAN-K hope all will be resolved

No it is not good lucik Ian but good luck '''''''''''children what a mess to start a knew life with expecting the adults are responsible and STABLE UH NOT!!! what a mess. Yeh too right slag him off the most important thing in his life right now is not his mum, no, not his wife, no wey!! yes his three children thats all that matters and he needs to get his priorities right. yes he asked for advice and hes got it A LOT OF IT JUST BECAUSE IT IS NOT WHAT HE MAY WANT TO HEAR DOES NOT MEAN ITS NOT GOOD ADVICE "ITS TRUTHFULL"

supergrand

Belinda_W wrote: »

No it is not good lucik Ian but good luck '''''''''''children what a mess to start a knew life with expecting the adults are responsible and STABLE UH NOT!!! what a mess. Yeh too right slag him off the most important thing in his life right now is not his mum, no, not his wife, no wey!! yes his three children thats all that matters and he needs to get his priorities right. yes he asked for advice and hes got it A LOT OF IT JUST BECAUSE IT IS NOT WHAT HE MAY WANT TO HEAR DOES NOT MEAN ITS NOT GOOD ADVICE "ITS TRUTHFULL"

truthfull in whos eyes? only IAN-KAY knows the truth in all of this. whats it like to be perfect belinda? do tell!!

silvercar

Anyone can have the intention of a move from a couple to a unit containing a couple plus one parent plus 3 kids. You can think that it will all go smoothly, everyone will get on, granny wil be a help with the children etc

Then reality bites and the stresses show and suddenly the previous dream is not workable.

What matters is where you go from here. You say you need to stay in the same home, but that means increasing your debt to enable your mother to have a place of her own. Excess debt causes stress, especially with three extra mouthes to feed. It may be better for the children if you moved home, not too terrible if you stay in the same area. If it makes a peaceful household and avoids debt it would be worth it.

I'm sure SS would see the benefit of not living with an aggresive person.

Belinda_W

supergrand wrote: »

truthfull in whos eyes? only IAN-KAY knows the truth in all of this. whats it like to be perfect belinda? do tell!!

duh this is nothing to do with being perfect dont recall saying i was. life is not perfect but to those children it is in a way. The only side that i am really on are those three little children do you have a problem with that???

poet123

Belinda_W wrote: »

duh this is nothing to do with being perfect dont recall saying i was. life is not perfect but to those children it is in a way. The only side that i am really on are those three little children do you have a problem with that???

Maybe not a problem with your intent, but how you are expressing it is very forceful, and not particularly polite. Also using capitals indicates you are "shouting", is really not the done thing.

supergrand

Belinda_W wrote: »

duh this is nothing to do with being perfect dont recall saying i was. life is not perfect but to those children it is in a way. The only side that i am really on are those three little children do you have a problem with that???

asbsolutely not! but the original question was not about the children but whether Ian-K could or should evict his mum and whatever you or i or any one else feels about the situation only ian-k can resolve this and only he knows the absolute truth and should act on what his conscience tells him and in this i wish him good luck

Belinda_W

yes i know that the orignal q's was not regarding these children but lets face it this is what it boils down to and why he wants his mum out isnt it??? I am anything but agressive lol ( half my [problem in life i am too soft) I am trying to look at things from these very very new little children, surely now they are in the equation this is what it is truely about isnt it???? even from Ians point of view???? These children do not has access to the internet i wonder what they would say if they did. Poor kids in a new home and all this adult hassle sad it really is and what an enviroment to bring children into

silvercar

At what point do "adopted children" become "children".

When do you move from "vunerable little people that need protecting" to kids that have two loving parents and that should be enough. How many adopted and non-adopted children move home because their family circumstances mean a smaller house. Loads, every day; they all cope.

What is important is that the children have loving parents who care for them and that they are in a secure environment, not whether they have to cope with a house move.

Belinda_W

My point exactly silvercar its at the end of the day all about these three little mights (adoption is not an excuse~) they would not care if they lived in a tent providing they are loved and feel secure, wanted and the adoption word can be dropped. I think you are lucky to be given such a prescious gift in life so put them first and enjoy every moment you get with them.

so if at the end of the day the house next door is 3/4 of the size and for sell buy it and settle down. you still need to work things out for all of your sakes your bitterness will spread if you dont lead by example

AMILLIONDOLLARS

supergrand wrote: »

i cant beleive what im hearing here! some one genuinely asking for help and advice, otherwise why would he post in the first place? and all he gets is people slagging him off, calling him a theif his wife a granny batterer and not fit to look after 3 adopted children. come on folks get a grip, this has gone way too far! if youve nothing helpful or constructive to say then DONT SAY ANYTHING!! good luck IAN-K hope all will be resolved

Totally agree with this statement. He came on here for some help, a thief wouldn't give a monkeys! He is trying to do his best for all concerned, Obviously he has come to the wrong place!

AMD