Marathons, Money and Motivation

clearmydebts

You still need some support though, and some practical ways of dealing with your debt...............

doodledo_2

Its ok hun sometimes being funny about the situation is the only thing which gets us through it sanely lol.

Something has got to give hun. Why don't you post a SOA up on here so its there in black and white and then copy it into word or something and show him. Reality might hit him then.

CAFCGirl

doodledo wrote: »

Have you ever sat down with him and shown him the figures, debts, incomings outgoings etc ??

yep countless times....

His response is just that he cant pay them if he doesnt have money.....

Ive just sat here and done a load of letter for him, and worked out the % each debt represents, and the pro rata payment he can offer each of them and how long it will take to clear them, asking them to freze interest....

Its just things like this dont take ages, ive done it whilst posting on here.... but he could have done this, or asked me to help him to do this.... i even told him this was what he needed to do.....:mad:

clearmydebts

doodledo wrote: »

Its ok hun sometimes being funny about the situation is the only thing which gets us through it sanely lol.

Something has got to give hun. Why don't you post a SOA up on here so its there in black and white and then copy it into word or something and show him. Reality might hit him then.

Good idea - and it is good to keep a sense of humour. As long as it isn't hysteria! lol!

CAFCGirl

clearmydebts wrote: »

You still need some support though, and some practical ways of dealing with your debt...............

And thats why I have you guys....... my monetary angels :A

clearmydebts

CAFCGirl wrote: »

yep countless times....

His response is just that he cant pay them if he doesnt have money.....

Ive just sat here and done a load of letter for him, and worked out the % each debt represents, and the pro rata payment he can offer each of them and how long it will take to clear them, asking them to freze interest....

Its just things like this dont take ages, ive done it whilst posting on here.... but he could have done this, or asked me to help him to do this.... i even told him this was what he needed to do.....:mad:

Maybe your DH is depressed. Is he always like this, only he doesn't seem to be motivated at all and has a very down hearted response to his debts. Does he not see that he is going to lose his car? Is he not able to see how stressed you are?

doodledo_2

Well we are here for you and don't you forget it, we cant help literally but we can be a place to offload if nothing else.

CAFCGirl

clearmydebts wrote: »

Maybe your DH is depressed. Is he always like this, only he doesn't seem to be motivated at all and has a very down hearted response to his debts. Does he not see that he is going to lose his car? Is he not able to see how stressed you are?

No he knows, but his response is they can just come and take it because he cant make the payments.....despite me then saying how is he then going to get to manchester for his interviews etc....

I don't think he's depressed he's just very determined about one thing in life, and its very all consuming and the root of everything he does, and the answer to everything, despite me telling him that it might not ever happen and he may have to get a new dream!

He sees how stressed i am but he thinks thats mainly to do with my work, which partly it is,but ive had to stay in a stressful job because i cant afford to leave because hes not paying anything....

clearmydebts

CAFCGirl wrote: »

No he knows, but his response is they can just come and take it because he cant make the payments.....despite me then saying how is he then going to get to manchester for his interviews etc....

I don't think he's depressed he's just very determined about one thing in life, and its very all consuming and the root of everything he does, and the answer to everything, despite me telling him that it might not ever happen and he may have to get a new dream!

He sees how stressed i am but he thinks thats mainly to do with my work, which partly it is,but ive had to stay in a stressful job because i cant afford to leave because hes not paying anything....

Well if he isn't depressed then he needs a good kick up the backside cos he sounds very immature especially with regards the car. That is a really silly attitude. How will he drive to and from work?

I think Doodles suggestion of an SOA is a good one. Then we can maybe give practical advice

CAFCGirl

He bikes to and from work at the moment but that was my point, if he gets into the FS and is driving 100 miles, he'll need a reliable car to be able to do that....

My SOA at the moment feels too much like a scary thing to do..... LOL because i know its not pretty.....i'll put it down to shame....