MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Would you put £10 in Kitty's birthday kitty?

Former_MSE_Andrea Posts: 9,614
Combo Breaker First Post I've helped Parliament Rampant Recycler
edited 19 May 2009 at 5:59PM in MoneySaving polls
Here's this week's hypothetical situation for you to cogitate on:
Would you put £10 in Kitty's birthday kitty?

You started a new job a fortnight ago, it's one of your new colleagues, Kitty's, 50th birthday and everyone's been asked to put £10 in Kitty's birthday kitty for the present. Yet you're not flushed with cash not having been paid yet, and you hardly know her. What would you do?
Click reply to have your say

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  • scotsbob
    scotsbob Posts: 4,632 Forumite
    Not for a 50 year old.

    If she was a bit younger it might be worth it to get noticed.

  • Nah. And if she expects it, she's exactly the kind of person that doesn't deserve it.
  • pinkstacey
    pinkstacey Posts: 14 Forumite
    Who comes up with this stuff at work? Money for birthdays, money for leaving, money for pregnancy, cakes on brithday, money for charities.

    I'd be keeping my money on this one!
  • katecheshire
    katecheshire Posts: 229
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    We collect for our team's birthdays and we've been doing it for several years - the person gets the cash so basically you get out what you put in over the year. We never expect temps to contribute unless they have been there a few months' If it was someone else's birthday outside our team we would only give if it was a 'big' one and then you put in what you like not a set amount. If you don't really know the person you don't put in. Same with leaving collections.
  • Stubert
    Stubert Posts: 733 Forumite
    Coming to the end of my student years I've only had temp jobs over the summers. I hated it when people came round asking money for Doris in the HR Department or whoever. Having no idea who she is, never going to meet her I don't really want to contribute thank you. You wouldn't give me a fiver towards my grannys birthday who you are never going to meet, so please take that scornful look off your face when I politely decline saying I don't know who it is.
  • I really think it is time to stop these collections in the workplace. It puts pressure on people who may not really be able to afford to give or may not want to. If the person celebrating the Birthday/Engagement etc wants to bring cakes/chocolates in, then that is up to them, but nobody should expect work colleagues to donate money to them. The nicest thing I received from colleagues was a card that had been signed by all of them with their jokey comments. That meant a lot yet cost very little.
  • Cloudane
    Cloudane Posts: 524
    First Post First Anniversary
    edited 20 May 2009 at 12:38AM
    £10 contribution for a birthday for a colleague seems rather generous as it is, unless it's a *really* close colleague. No wonder the UK is in such a bad financial situation! There's a good chance that whoever's in charge will buy something that will go to waste anyway. It's all about the gesture, not the money spent or the actual item received, so why spend so much.

    Nope. Sorry if it sounds tight, but we get leaving boxes often enough (high staff turnover), generally you're only expected to put in a pound or two and even with that I tend to be in 2 minds about if it's someone I've only walked past in the corridor once or twice. It all adds up! I'm sure it'd be the same with the roles reversed.

    (People I will actually miss get extra... okay, I'm not tight enough in reality to deny those I barely know but "have working there as the one thing in common" something like 50p but that's all they're gettin'!)

    In our case they actually just send a box round and ask you to pass it on to the next department, so in theory you can get away with not donating without any embarrassment, if personal morals permit. Watching who's contributed is wrong though, IMO, and against the spirit of willful donations*.

    * i.e. that a nice gift to receive is one given on the person's own initiative and from the bottom of their heart (even if it cost little or nothing), not under peer pressure and from the bottom of their wallet.
  • WhyIsSavingSoHard
    WhyIsSavingSoHard Posts: 60
    Home Insurance Hacker! Cashback Cashier
    edited 20 May 2009 at 1:41AM
    You've only just started the job, not yet been paid, still have everyday expenses and they want £10 from you??? NO way. Contributing less would be so obvious (as they'd be expecting to count in £10's), so I'd politely explain that I'm skint until my first pay day. Chances are they've all been in your shoes before and would be fine about it, although it's tough if they don't understand.

    I'm in agreement though, that all this 'collecting for .........' business is way out of hand. An ex-colleague of mine had her 60th the other year and they did a 'give as much/little as you like' collection. I put in £1 as I hadn't much money, but I offered to make (and did) the card from us all and told them I'd get a box of chocolates to add to the presents. The chocolates were some I'd been given a month earlier and don't like. She was really pleased with them both and still has the card on show today.
    :j I'm not supposed to be normal, I'm supposed to be me:j
    :dance: Quidco cash back since May 2010 ~ more than £83.13 :dance:
    Must remember to use it more, but every little helps
  • frederickb
    frederickb Posts: 10 Forumite
    Generous sod that I am probably would but would feel that I had been intimidated into it
    :beer: Eric Patterson
  • hermoine_2
    hermoine_2 Posts: 240 Forumite
    No way would I put £10 in any ones birthday collection. If everyone puts in £1 then a card and some chocs or wine would be purchased. Surely that is enough, I really agree with the posters who say the collections should be banned. I worked in a huge financial institute for a couple of years and there was a collection most days, if I had put into them all I would have been working for nothing.

    In most circumstances a card would suffice and for special birthdays or leaving colleagues just a modest gift to let them know they are thought about should be enough.

    In my experience the close friends of the birthday person will normally stump up for the collection and then get a personal gift as well this is a lot of pressure.

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