MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Would you give up a £50 train seat for a pregnant woman?

Macmuffin

Hmmm..... What an interesting cross-section of views and opinions this has generated. I suppose the views expressed only serve to indicate the wide range of morals and standards the individuals concerned choose to live their lives by, and so in turn reflects the society in which we live. (And all part of life's 'rich tapestry' no doubt?!)

Personally I'm not sure where the 'dilemma' comes in, no matter how much I'd paid for the seat. For me it's a no-brainer; I'm physically fit enough to stand for several hours without it causing me any significant discomfort or concern, for which I am grateful since there are many other people who are not as fortunate as me, but it would concern me to see someone else in distress, especially when I'm in a position to be able to help alleviate that, or at least make an offer to assist.

And yes, sometimes my offers have been rebuked, or there has been little if any appreciation or thanks proffered and I have even been taken advantage of as a result on occasion, but even so when reflecting on such things, I find it a lot easier to live with the knowledge that I tried to help, rather than knowing I could have done something but chose not to.

The test for me has always been, and will remain, "How would I like to be treated and/or what help would I appreciate if I found myself in that position?" (Because, maybe one day..................)

niccin

no i wouldnt. i've been pregnant 3 times and do not think pregnancy stops a woman from booking their own seat just like anyone else. if i've planned ahead, and secured a seat, i'm going to sit on it.

brightonman123

havent seen anyone mentioning the lady offering to pay the difference..?

hundredk

Un0riginal wrote: »

Without question. If fact I would extend this to anyone who looked like they needed the seat more than I.



What a ridiculous notion, the obvious fact here is that your parents did not spare the time to teach you any manners, and you have obviously not picked them up anywhere else. Deliberating on how and why the heavily pregnant women found herself on a packed train during a bank holiday, when anyone of even menial intelligence would have found another mode of transport or not travelled .. .. .. blah blah blah .. .. .. is neither here nor there. There fact of the matter is that there is someone who is in need of help, and of story.



Rather lets hope that the genes of those with no manners or consideration don't get added to the gene pool and the world will gradually become a much better place.

What is disturbing for me is that I clicked the link to this thread thinking 'What a silly question, everyone would of course stand up for someone heavily pregnant'.

It's not a silly question it's a hypothetical situation and moral dilemma. For all those bleating about the "plight" of a poor distressed pregnant woman and people have no manners, note the OP said "normally you'd be up in a flash". To undertake a 5 hour journey whilst heavily pregnant and obviously busy on a bank holiday and give no thought to the situation you might be in is irresponsible - end of story.

It's bank holiday - maybe she is on the way to a theme park and some white knuckle rides cos clearly she ain't thought about the implications of 5 hour busy train journey. In need of help, yes but perhaps the help needed is a common sense gene.

brendas

I would ask her where she was travelling to and if it was not too far give up my seat for that time otherwise I would offer to "hot seat" as long as I had a seat for some of the journey I would be OK with that.

As for her booking a seat...what if she had received a phone call that morning telling her bad news about one of her family and she had to be at their bedside or escaping from an abusive partner who would be putting her unborn child at risk as not all signs of abuse are evident!!!!

shandypants5

Macmuffin wrote: »

Hmmm..... What an interesting cross-section of views and opinions this has generated. I suppose the views expressed only serve to indicate the wide range of morals and standards the individuals concerned choose to live their lives by, and so in turn reflects the society in which we live. (And all part of life's 'rich tapestry' no doubt?!)

Personally I'm not sure where the 'dilemma' comes in, no matter how much I'd paid for the seat. For me it's a no-brainer; I'm physically fit enough to stand for several hours without it causing me any significant discomfort or concern, for which I am grateful since there are many other people who are not as fortunate as me, but it would concern me to see someone else in distress, especially when I'm in a position to be able to help alleviate that, or at least make an offer to assist.

And yes, sometimes my offers have been rebuked, or there has been little if any appreciation or thanks proffered and I have even been taken advantage of as a result on occasion, but even so when reflecting on such things, I find it a lot easier to live with the knowledge that I tried to help, rather than knowing I could have done something but chose not to.

The test for me has always been, and will remain, "How would I like to be treated and/or what help would I appreciate if I found myself in that position?" (Because, maybe one day..................)

:T:T:T Well said.

englishmac

LOUY wrote: »

I would probably sell her my seat.

In fact, given the demand for the seat, I might auction it too everyone standing and make some money from the process.

:money:

You wouldn't have time to auction it - all the good people have leapt up and given their seats away so the demand has waned.

The only real solution to this dilemma is to rip out all the train seats. Then everybody has to stand and there is no argument. Cattle trucks will solve a lot of the overcrowding problem as well - a bonus!!

hundredk

unhealthyman wrote: »

Some of the posts in the this thread are horrifically petty, misinformed and just plain apalling.

Firstly, being a "money saving expert" does not mean you have to be a ruthless b@stard. You can still do nice things regardless of whether you are reserved in that seat or not. There is more to life than money you nasty little people.

Secondly, booking a reserved seat in advance is NEVER more expensive than buying a walk on ticket, and in many cases is considerably cheaper. So while the pregnant lady may not have a reserved seat, she certainly did pay at least as much as you.

Thirdly, being pregnant doesn't mean that you have to plan in advance to make up for any difficult situations. For example, I have had to buy a ticket last minute to go to a friends funeral. I had to pay full price, but I couldn't exactly have paid for it in advance. There are a lot greater things that might be going on that you just don't know about. Assuming she is badly organised to not have a ticket is presumptuous and irrelevant.

Fourthly, to everyone suggesting that she pay to upgrade to first class... unless you are travelling on the weekend this can be horrifically expensive. Suggesting this is some kind of "pregnancy tax" that she deserves for getting in this situation is disgusting. Look in the mirror, grow up, or something. You have no idea what her situation is.

At some point the desperate scraping to save cash and take "what is rightfully yours" must be taken over by common decency. I'm geniunely upset by the number of pathetic penny pinching posts in this thread from fellow forum users showing some kind of righteous fury at the suggestion they should give up their seat. Of course you should. If you yourself are frail/old/pregnant/disabled, then obviously disregard this. That's common sense. But for the vast majority it is simply human decency.

I would rather stand for 5 hours than sit shamefully while a heavily pregant woman suffers. The fact that anyone else would choose differently is depressing. And everyone is in a rage about how morally bankrupt bankers are?... I'm embarassed for some of the posters on this site.

"Some of the posts in the this thread are horrifically petty, misinformed and just plain apalling. - Presumably you are referring to comments like "ruthless b@stard" and "nasty little people". Other comments are posters opinions about the original thread, not misinformed and off topic.

1. You can still use common sense whether pregnant or not. And you can be nice and still have the ability to reserve a seat.

2. Then no reason not to reserve the seat and save some money too.:wall:

3. Common sense - pregnant, long journey, few seats...hmmm perhaps it's too obvious to think of the consequences and easier to form opinions of those who may have had the foresight to book. Note the thread is not about pregnant plus some dire circumstances that we don't know about.

4.True, we have no idea what her situation is, neither do you. The thread is about pregnant woman and others giving up a seat, thats it. Doesn't say she is on the way to dying relative, fleeing from a mad axeman or whatever. Horrifically expensive to upgrade to first class - now isn't that the reason why the people reserve the £50 seats in the first place.:wall::wall::wall::wall::wall:

The "righteous fury" is simply the opinion of fellow posters, possibly the majority. Its easy to say "of course you should give the seat" and dismiss all those with a diffrent opinion as penny pinching, no decency etc - simply not true. The people in the seats are not taking what is rightfully theirs, they are already in the seats. Common sense to book in advance on a busy route.

Tiger_greeneyes

brendas wrote: »

I would ask her where she was travelling to and if it was not too far give up my seat for that time otherwise I would offer to "hot seat" as long as I had a seat for some of the journey I would be OK with that.

As for her booking a seat...what if she had received a phone call that morning telling her bad news about one of her family and she had to be at their bedside or escaping from an abusive partner who would be putting her unborn child at risk as not all signs of abuse are evident!!!!

I can see your point However, it's simply not part of the question that was put to us to answer.

There's all sorts of highly unnecessary melodramatic assumptions been going on in this thread - the woman didn't ask to be pregnant because she was raped, she's on her last legs with a life-threatening illness or six, she can't walk, the child's life is in danger, she's in labour and now she's escaping a violent partner and has a dying relative to boot. I'm sure that if any information of that nature was actually included in the original question then chances are the thread would have gone in a completely different direction.

The trouble with this question is that for some unfathomable reason, it's sparked a lot of people into having highly over-emotional knee-jerk, histrionic responses. They have elevated themselves to moral judge and jury. They've decided it's perfectly acceptable to verbally abuse the people who aren't adding all that extra information to the question. Pathetic really, it says more about them than the people who have read the question and answered it as it is. One obnoxious degenerate has even seen fit to make highly derogatory and offensive remarks about my parents simply because s/he disagrees with my point of view. How exactly is that acceptable?

Meanwhile, the other camp are stepping back and not actually seeing where all the melodrama is coming from - as far as the question is concerned, she just hasn't booked a seat for herself. As someone else pointed out, as she's pregant and there's no available seats, she can get a free upgrade to first class. Job done. Where's the actual problem? Everyone gets a seat, nobody died :rolleyes:

Anyone would think that those of us who haven't added all sorts of tragic theatrics into the question or gone into histrionics about how this poor hypothetical woman is actually the victim of the century, and have actually dared to voice an opposing point of view are tantamount to public enemy no.1.

I couldn't live my life with such melodrama and hystrionics going on

hundredk

englishmac wrote: »

The only real solution to this dilemma is to rip out all the train seats. Then everybody has to stand and there is no argument. Cattle trucks will solve a lot of the overcrowding problem as well - a bonus!!

Or put prices up until no. seats = no. passengers