MONEY MORAL DILEMMA. Would you give up a £50 train seat for a pregnant woman?

shonsay

rountree wrote: »

no i wouldn't.

It's not my fault she hasn't got a seat, and it's not my fault she's pregnant. She should have booked in advance like (i assume) everyone else, and if i've paid £50 for a seat, I certainly wouldn't give it up for anyone, old lady/pregnant woman.

Taxpayers will be paying towards the cost of her child so why start helping her with a seat too?

If it was me, I wouldn't expect anyone who has paid for their seat and has a long journey to give their seat up for me, but then again, I would have booked in advance!

I think it's quite rude that people in society still believe in these things, I mean, why should anyone feel pushed to do this? I am a woman and yet I don't believe this.

You are incredibly selfish and I cannot believe the number of people on here who seem to share your disgusting opinion. Firstly, she has probably paid the same price for a ticket as you - she is not travelling for free. Secondly, her financial situation is irrelevant. You pay taxes to the government and they decide who gets it - get over it. How dare you judge someone on their financial position anyway - who made you so high and mighty?

Clearly you have never travelled long distance on a busy train as 9 times out of 10 your booked seat will be taken, so booking it does not mean you are guaranteed it! And sometimes things happen in life that you can't plan ahead for and so you are unable to book a seat!

I am a 27 year old woman, no kids, not pregnant. I would not hesitate to offer up my seat to a person who needed it more. It's the right thing to do and you know it, hence the reason you come up with ludicrous excuses like the ones you have mentioned to try to justify your selfishness.

robpw2

shonsay wrote: »

Clearly you have never travelled long distance on a busy train as 9 times out of 10 your booked seat will be taken, so booking it does not mean you are guaranteed it! And sometimes things happen in life that you can't plan ahead for and so you are unable to book a seat!

QUOTE]
if you have booked the seat and somoen is sat there call the guard they will move them for you and if they refuse to move then they will give you a free upgrade to firstclass if there is space ..

Einstein29

Yes i would, because i have been in a sticky situation be4 and a total stranger has come 2 my rescue, its karma.

paulabear

justmarried06 wrote: »

Haven't had a chance to read the whole thread so apologies if any of this has been said already....!!

I commute on a daily basis into work and have frequently given up my seat for pregnant ladies, parents with children in buggies, older people and anyone I feel could do with a seat more than I could - at the end of the day I'm happy to park my behind on the floor if I need to - and I'm used to it with the commute I do!!

However, I have to say that if it was a longer train journey (which I've also had to do regularly in the course of visiting other offices) then I don't give up my (reserved) seat for pregnant ladies - because the train companies all operate on the system that if you have your Mat B1 form with you and there are no seats available elsewhere on the train then you can travel in first class for no additional fare.

That's going to be my approach when hubs and I do have sproglets, I'll just make sure I've got my form with me in case I need to venture into the realsm of 1st class seating

JM xxx

I wish I'd known this last year! Could we get it put into one of the emails, do you think? Where did you find this out?
Last year I had to make several train journeys lasting an hour and a half as my mum was dying from ovarian cancer and had unexpectedly been told she had only weeks left. Obviously I wanted to spend as much time as possible with her - unfortunately I live some way away, don't drive, was six months pregnant and had a three year-old and an 18 month-old with me. It never even occurred to me to book a seat to be honest as I had a double buggy and all the kids' paraphenalia with me, so it was luck of the draw as to whether I got to park in the disabled/buggy section or had to juggle the toddler while folding up the buggy. I also had quite a lot on my mind, as you can imagine. But I do remember one occasion when I had the kids sat in the big luggage shelf thing (they loved it!) with the buggy underneath, looking obviously pregnant, leaning against the luggage rack as all the seats were full. Every time I looked around every head seemed to turn away quickly as very obviously nobody wanted to give their seat up :rolleyes: can't believe I forgot about that when I first read this thread! Mind you it's not a time I like to think about so I've probably put it out of mind...

Anyway I wonder do they let you go in the first class bit if you've got kids with you? What about when there's no first class bit? Just wondering...

smk77

paulabear wrote: »

I wish I'd known this last year! Could we get it put into one of the emails, do you think? Where did you find this out?
Last year I had to make several train journeys lasting an hour and a half as my mum was dying from ovarian cancer and had unexpectedly been told she had only weeks left. Obviously I wanted to spend as much time as possible with her - unfortunately I live some way away, don't drive, was six months pregnant and had a three year-old and an 18 month-old with me. It never even occurred to me to book a seat to be honest as I had a double buggy and all the kids' paraphenalia with me, so it was luck of the draw as to whether I got to park in the disabled/buggy section or had to juggle the toddler while folding up the buggy. I also had quite a lot on my mind, as you can imagine. But I do remember one occasion when I had the kids sat in the big luggage shelf thing (they loved it!) with the buggy underneath, looking obviously pregnant, leaning against the luggage rack as all the seats were full. Every time I looked around every head seemed to turn away quickly as very obviously nobody wanted to give their seat up :rolleyes: can't believe I forgot about that when I first read this thread! Mind you it's not a time I like to think about so I've probably put it out of mind...

Anyway I wonder do they let you go in the first class bit if you've got kids with you? What about when there's no first class bit? Just wondering...

Apparently you are very stupid. :rotfl:

People on here seem to have got this idea that this woman is completely wrong for travelling whilst pregnant and not booking a ticket. Too many assumptions like "she's known for a long time that she was having a baby so should have booked in advance".

I wonder how many of the people on your train had the attitude that too many on here have.

I bet that this scenario goes unanswered, but, of those who wouldn't give up their seat what would you do if:

You are sitting very close to the woman and she takes a call on her mobile (not speaking loud so that everyone can hear!). You over hear the conversation and pick up the fact that the women has just found out that a parent is seriously ill and got on the train ASAP. You hear her mention (and not so everyone can hear!) that she can't get a seat and that her feet and back are sore. You can tell that she is distressed by the news that she has just found out and the fact that she is in pain.


If you don't offer up your seat you are one selfish, rude and cruel *****.

If you do offer your seat then why do you need to know that much before you do a good deed??

jackie1969uk

BostonMan wrote: »

Of course I would. I think that men should be required by law to give up their seat to a pregnant woman. If their were no sitting men then a non-pregnant woman should get up.

Just a point to note that this it is 2009 in case you didn't notice and the train company would be sued for sexual discrimination if they made men stand to let a woman sit down.

They tried "woman and children first" on the titanic too and that really worked didn't it? Women fought and chained themselves to gates to be equal. I would give her my seat without a doubt but I wouldn't expect a man by law to be made to stand and I don't think the pregnant woman would either. Men would never pay for a train ticket if they were likely to be made to stand.

smk77

Trialia wrote: »

That would be you and several other people on this thread who are of your opinions, then, since you seem to have taken to yourself the right to harangue a disabled person for having no manners because she won't let a pregnant woman take her seat, and I see that in general here it has been the ones who would give up the seat who are being rude and verbally insulting to other people, frequently without bothering to consider individual circumstances.

That is nonsense. I don't think anyone on here would expect a disabled person to give up their seat.

It's a very simple question. Would you give up your seat? You wouldn't because of a disability. That's fair enough. Others wouldn't because they are old. Again fair enough. Young and physically able people - well, they'll have to do what they feel is right.

smk77

jackie1969uk wrote: »

They tried "woman and children first" on the titanic too and that really worked didn't it?

Yes it did, lots of women and children survived. The problem with the Titanic was that there wasn't enough lifeboats because the ship was "unsinkable".

shonarose

Trialia wrote: »

That would be you and several other people on this thread who are of your opinions, then, since you seem to have taken to yourself the right to harangue a disabled person for having no manners because she won't let a pregnant woman take her seat, and I see that in general here it has been the ones who would give up the seat who are being rude and verbally insulting to other people, frequently without bothering to consider individual circumstances.

NO ONE has suggested that a disabled, ill or otherwise incapacitated person should give up their seat, nor that they should feel obliged to, or have no manners for not doing so. OK, so you've established that your individual circumstances mean that it would not be appropriate for you to give up your seat - this doesnt mean that it wouldn't be a good thing for someone else to do.

It is irrelevant and unneccessary for some of the comments on here about pregnant women to be so vituperative and vicious, to question whether she should be allowed on public transport (should disabled or old people travel on public transport, then, if it will inconvenience the rest of us?), her lack of responsibility, her apparent stupidity and selfishness for becoming pregnant in the first place....

No, the pregnant woman doesnt have a "right" to a seat, but if she hadn't been able to obtain one - for whatever reason - she would certainly need one more than a fully able-bodied person, so if it was within their power to help her, why wouldnt they?

As a disabled person, I'm sure you've experienced, at some point, the ways in which there are attempts to assist those who are in greater need (disabled parking spaces, etc), so surely you accept the principle that in a cooperative society, the ideal is that we should protect and support each other when possible, particularly those who have a special need, regardless of how they came to be in that need.

There is a moral obligation on all of us to do what we can, to the extent of our ability, to make the world a better place, no? Yes, of course, that would include the pregnant woman making the effort to plan ahead if possible!

But what if she isnt the lazy, stupid, arrogant person that many of you seem to assume, she simply has not been able to get hold of a seat? She is in front of you, not demanding a seat, but clearly in need. You are able-bodied. In these circumstances, there isnt a reason in the world why offering your seat isnt the right, kind, generous, beneficial thing to do.

Primrose

Quick thought - I wonder how many of the people on here who would refuse to give up their train seat to a pregnant woman are currently castigating and expressing disgust at MP's for the abuse of their expenses? Are there different categories of "morality"?