Neighbours Complaining! Help!

spinningsheep

It does sound like an awful situation, and I can see it from both sides, I honestly do think you should maybe pop round one night with a bottle of wine and have a nice chat, you'd be surprised what can be achieved by just talking it through like adults. Just talk it through, discuss how you feel and that you want to be good neighbours, and ask them what they expect and you in turn can say the same and see what comes from it, if they refuse and just carry on being damned difficult, id say sod em, move and make their life hell till you do, after all, you are offering the olive branch!

We live in an end of terrace and we get on exceptionally well with our neighbours on one side, and I am always so paranoid about noise from us affecting them, but no, they say they hardly ever hear us, and the loudest thing they hear is us poking the fire which they like because it reminds them of years gone by! If we ever have any sort of get together we always forwarn them and ask if they want to come round for a drink, they never take up the invite unfortunately but its always nice to ask, we LOVE our neighbours and as they have lived here since the early 60's, and were good friends with my landlady, and she still chats with them, and I know she has said many times how she loves living next to us, so its all good!

GrammarGirl

We're wedged in a mid-terrace with very, VERY thin walls. On one side we have three girls who go through stages with noise. We'll hear nothing for weeks, then we'll have three days of constant DIYing at 11pm, shouting and screaming, sex noises and door banging! I think maybe this is when a boyfriend visits! However, we haven't complained about it because it happens irregularly and we can deal with it.

On the other side live a middle aged couple, who have a son (I think) who visits every month and spends the night in his room blasting rap music! Again, it doesn't bother us as it's infrequent.

As for our own noise, we've had a few parties, but we always go round to let our neighbours know and make sure it's ok with them. Is this something you could consider? I'm not sure prior warning would make your neighbours any less miserable, but you could give it a go! If you're having friends over just pop round and let them know, and make it clear you will be considerate.

Like others have said, it seems more like a clash of lifestyles than anything else.

I_know_my_ABC_and_my_CMYK

A stroke can actually change the personality of the victim and also make them noise intolerant. They can also become more argumentative, grumpy tearful and clingy too as well as many other emotions. We have this problem with my father when he had his stroke, his personality totally altered. You making noise could also make him feel venerable so to compensate be becomes a right pain in the !!!. When your tenancy is up you may want to think about moving somewhere easier for you to live. You're not in an easy position.

honeyD

I dont think you are making excessive noise! I think your neighbours need to stop nitpicking at every little noise. The 2am thing wasnt good but you have apologised for it, what more can you do? They cannot expect you to be quiet and tiptoe around your home while they shout and scream either, that is not fair.
We have problem neighbours. We live in a semi and the walls arent so thin but we hear them everyday. The man shouts and swears at his wife all day, we have heard him on occasion beating her too. She shouts at him too, the kids shout at each other and their parents. The son plays loud rave music and has loads of friends over to "sing" along to it on their microphones/karaoke? That is quite annoying lol. They have groups of people running up and down their stairs which are next to my living room and sometimes its like the elephants have moved in! They hammer at 10:30 at night for 20 minutes plus at a time. One of the parents always seem to be locked out so bang and kick the front door for sometimes an hour at early hours in the morning on numerous occasions. They have dogs which bark all day for no apparent reason. They hammer at something early in the morning but I have no idea what it is! The son has also taken to playing his music and "singing" along with his friends at around 10am. There is more of this but I cannot think of it at the moment.
Myself and my Husband are pretty quiet. We're in our early 20's, we dont have parties, we dont drink, we dont shout at each other, the most noise made in our home is from the washing machine which I think needs new bearings lol. We dont have the TV loud, or music blasting any time of the day. We put our dogs outside one day last week for just over an hour while we had visitors and the neighbour had the nerve to come and ask me to bring them in! Seriously, I dont know if these people even realise the amount of noise they make!
Their noise does annoy me but I have never complained to them as I dont see the point, I doubt it will stop. Ive never complained about their dogs either as we have dogs too and obviously dogs will bark, so even if theirs were barking all night I wouldnt complain, but they have shown they will for the slightest thing. Sigh.

lrr_2

You pay money to live in that house not creep about in it. Why are people afraid about upsetting the neighbours, if you are sensible and know right from wrong which im sure you do there is nothing wrong with having friends round.
Some neighbours think they own the street (as i have found out previously as they have lived there longer however i pay for my house and i am not a rowdy neighbour so couldnt give a monkeys what they think)
You pay for it, use it within reason.
Too much of a nanny state
Live and let live, your a long time dead!

frank.hopper

i am not a rowdy neighbour so couldnt give a monkeys what they think

Sure! :rolleyes:

lrr_2

frank.hopper wrote: »

Sure! :rolleyes:

I am quiet neighbour as my neighbours would tell you. My point is some people are too much being nosey neighbours (the curtain twitchers) and bullying their neighbours into tip-toeing around them. Ive heard of some people who dont like to go in their garden to hang washing out in their pjs because they are getting spied on by their neighbours. Unless you live in the middle of nowhere on your own you have to allow some degree of noise from neighbours unless you have your house fully soundproofed, its a fact of life!

1sue23

Sometimes no matter what you do it makes no difference and if your neighbour has taken a dislike to you he will be waiting for the chance to be critical at the slightest thing ,I lived next to a couple years ago and they made my life miserable ,it stared with my kettle came round to ask me did I drink a lot of tea because they could hear the whistle ,next they wanted to know if I set the table for breakfast because they could hear my dishes being rattled at night ,told me they went to bed at nine and would I mind walking the dog before this as the front door closing disturbed them ,they got the police out to my wild party it was 5 year olds having a birthday party in the afternoon the best was when they complained about our lovemaking 5 or more times a night because they could hear the headboard banging on the wall my husband felt very proud about this, just one problem he worked away from home at the time ,next he complained about the flowers in the garden they looked messy ,he told everyone that the problems were caused by us being English we lived in Perth it turned out that he belonged to an anti English group and his weekends were spent sticking English go home stickers on lamp posts

m_13

It's unfortunate that things have built up with your neighbour but I think you have to be careful about starting to ask them for 'permission' every time you want to make reasonable noise. We started this with a previous neighbour who was disabled and only went out one morning a week to shop and eventually couldn't do anything as we were so terrified about him coming round and shouting. We tried and tried to appease him but in the end couldn't do anything at all that made noise. We tried ringing in advance but he started saying it was not convenient to make noise (simple things like putting up a shelf which involved drilling) and could we wait two hours etc.

I think you were unreasonable with the 2am noise but you recognise this. However, I wouldn't be bending over backwards about reasonable noise. In the end they will control you or choose the tenants, which is probably what they really want.

ILW

Molly1986 wrote: »

Oi! I’m not a chav, we are just normal young people who have a life!

Sounds like the tenants always loose out here.

The people in the house previously moved out because of misery guts, I’m sure he sits all day with his ear against the wall! Well if this carries on and we do eventually get chucked out it will be parties galore round at mine till the notice is up! Then he’ll know what noise is! Why do people feel the need to be so miserable!

Sounding even more chavvy now.