Girlfriend wants us to get married. I can see us going back to square one

happee

The best weddings are small intimate affairs. I've been to loads of 'big white weddings' and I'm sure the brides all had their big day, but for the guests they aren't that much fun really. We had a small wedding on the beach for 25, a lovely dinner, no flowers, no bridal party, just the 2 of us saying i love you and that even cost double we imagined. My advice and sit down and really think about what's important and what's not. Would you rather travel the world for a year or have a big white wedding? If we did it again, we'd be off around the world in a flash!

Horace

JC - wedding favours are sweeties or something given to each guest and invariably they are left behind, traditionally they will be 5 almonds to signify wealth, happiness etc wrapped in a bit of net:rolleyes:

Have the wedding that you want (OH must have her input too) and not what everyone else wants. There is no need to have a toastmaster nor even a disco. Inviting all and sundry is just mad - why should you invite Great Aunt Maud when you never see her? Its beyond me. It is possible to have a small wedding and it not cost the earth.

stroppy

Hi everyone.
Thought I may as well put my wedding day on here as it was one of the best days of my life at a reasonable cost,It came in at about £4,500.
We got married at two in the afternoon at our local council house (sounds bad but actually a gorgeous old building with sweeping staircase and balcony overlooking the city) We invited 35 close friends and family and then we took them to our favourite greek restaurant for the meal and had a huge mezze and lots of plate smashing,everybody had a great time though I did wonder what some of the elders thought of it all but hey it was our day and they all appreciated this!Luckily at the time we ran a pub so we closed it for the night and had our night time do there,inviting all other people we knew(old relatives we'd not seen for years and not so close friends etc)my uncle did the catering for the evening for a minimal cost and he also made our beautiful cake.We saved money on lots of things such as friends helping make the invites,decorate the pub,minimal flowers,a friend took the photos and another videoed it and our wedding bands were cheap as chips :DThis left a bit extra for the things that we thought really mattered.....the dress,limo and honeymoon to Florida for a week.The restaurant and booze came in at roughly £800 but was sooo worth it!
I have been to many weddings and have found the most boring ones to be the big fancy ones....so much standing round waiting for the 400 photos to be taken and all that big posh sit down bit....lol (but each to their own I suppose!)To be honest we spent more than we thought we would and cant understand people who spend silly amounts its just one day, you just need to make it special for you two...no-one else.
I felt like a princess on my wedding day because it was OUR special day.
Wish I could do it again......:D
Stroppy xx

Cleosmum

For us the marriage was the important bit, the wedding didnt need to be big. I think our wedding cost about £200, back in 2003. We had register office, my OH did my flowers, we bought the rings the day before (forgot them lol) and then we went to the pub over the road after for a drink with family and friends. It was great!!! I married the man of my dreams, my best friend, in a quiet ceremony, with the most important people in my life around me.

Good luck with planning your wedding, just remember its 1 day and not worth getting in debt for.

calcinite

Thought i would add to everyone eleses stories just to let you know you can have a nice wedding for a sensible price tag.

I paid about £3500 for my wedding 4 years ago and this included two weeks in barbados plus spending money. The acutual ceremony only cost us £500 in a lovely garden at a hotel in barbados by the beach.

When we got back we took family for meals to celebrate which cost us nothing as they insisted on paying. Much more memorable for us and very stress free.

Definately think you need to sit down and explore all options with OH. Alot of great ideas on here.

bargainbetty

Johnny_Chaos wrote: »

A quiet wedding......would be ideal for me.

Problem is: our families want a big do - aunts, uncles, cousins I never even see, relatives who I can't stand the sight of. My girlfriend also wants a big lavish do.

First, mentally tell your families to get stuffed. It's your day, and no-one except you and the missus has a say in how it goes, particularly if you are paying for it.

Second, work out how much you could reasonably save for a do. Look at what you can get for it. If she insists on a big do, ask her how she feels about people giving gift certificates that can be spent on the wedding expenses. Haggle with local suppliers and venues for a good deal.

I gave guests wedding cake instead of dessert - saved a fortune, and the damn thing got eaten instead of squashed in napkins going home. We had a black cab instead of a Rolls etc.... wore a cream cocktail dress instead of a frou-frou etc.... saved a fortune. Dinner for 40 close family and friends, party for 120 extended family and friends, and two weeks in the states for under £3500.

It's not impossible, we had a great day!

Good luck.

You can do it, but she needs to look at reality.