Debt out of control - please help

muddled_midget

I don't think anyone's mentioned the petrol yet, £250 is quite a large amount to be spending per month, is it all absolutely necessary, and would walking be an option for any of it? Think of both your health and the environment, and if the car(s) are gas guzzlers considering swapping them for something more economical, even half that money would cover 1200 miles in my little Saxo! I know one family sized car is necessary, but I'm assuming with this petrol consumption they're both quite large. Sorry if I'm assuming wrong, and as others have said, there's nothing for the car maintenance/running costs in your SOA
midget

sparkle84

The wine and the amount your hubby drinks could mean he is well aware of your financial problems and is trying to drown them out I enjoy a glass of vino myself but 2 bottles a night is excessive. You must talk to you husband about the problems.

I have often wondered is it easier or harder to cope with your debt as a single girl (myself and Ms London as still searching for Mr Right although I will take Mr Wrong at this point) or in a couple, and I do think it is easier for a single person, because being in a couple means you have to have the lightbulb moment together and it seems that is not always the case.

You have done really well to post here talk to hubby ask him to look on this board and see what you can sort out.

All the best

BobProperty

You say that you are paying £111 for endowments. I am inviting opinions on this as:
1. will they cover the mortgage?
2. are any of them worth cashing in, therefore stopping paying them, and using the money to pay off some of the debt?

sparkle84

BobProperty wrote:

You say that you are paying £111 for endowments. I am inviting opinions on this as:
1. will they cover the mortgage?
2. are any of them worth cashing in, therefore stopping paying them, and using the money to pay off some of the debt?

But then what do they use to repay the capital??

pinkbantam

Im very new on here and people are helping me on a thread at the moment, its such a supportive environment, you have definitely made a great first step!

Im not in a position to offer advice right now, there are people on this site that know so so much more, but may I suggest one thing?

Change your username to match your new motivated perspective - you certainly aren't beyond help, this website is testiment to that.

XXX

BobProperty

sparkle84 wrote:

But then what do they use to repay the capital??

That's why I posted it as a "what if". Have they taken out a new endowment everytime they re-mortgaged for instance? What would it cost to switch to a capital and repayment as compared to keeping the endowments going? There are a number of questions in this area for the OP to consider.

mountainofdebt

whilst I think the advice already given is excellant (as usual) I think the biggest problem that the OP faces is to get her husband on board.

(OP - if you didn't buy wine with the weekly shop would your hubby go out and buy it himself? If you didn't buy the little extras would he complain?.)

Also even if the OP made the savings that are being recommended (how do you secretly change your hubby's contract phone to a PAYG without him twigging?) how could she alone start to get rid of the debt if hubby is still flashing the plastic!

I don't want to be a thorn but just seems to me that the OP is facing an impossible task unless hubby is on board as well

tyllwyd

These are small things but you are spending £50 on Ballet lessons and Guides (and I guess more on uniform etc). Have you sat down with the kids and asked them if they honestly want to do it - it might be that they don't enjoy it that much, and they wouldn't mind giving up.

With presents, whenever I can I try to squirrel away a few things that my kids don't want/need at birthdays etc, and recycle them as presents to give away later! (only works if your kids don't notice, of course ...) You could try somewhere like Red House for cheap books for presents. And cards are a huge waste of money - could your kids maybe make their own on the computer? Or just look for the cheapest you can possibly find. (If you and your friends buy a lot of cards, you could always think about signing up as an independent trader for Phoenix cards and selling them yourself.)

And £250 on petrol a month seems a lot. Could you cut that down? Make the kids walk, it will do them good!!

Rather than paying over the odds for broadband with parental controls, why not have a look for software that will do the job - I've not used it, but I've heard of Net Nanny and there must be other options.

Why have you got both endowments and life insurance? There must be an element of life insurance within your endowments (and possibly some through your husband's work or pension?) It would be worth checking that you are not paying for more cover than you need.

You haven't written anything down for the cost of running a car (or is it two cars?) You've got insurance, servicing, road tax on top of petrol.

beyondhelp_2

woohoo_postingid wrote:

Until you BOTH realise that you need a complete lifestyle change, nothing is going to change. You may get a new mortgage and pay off some loans and then you will start again and will be back here again in a couple of years. You have done it a few times already and will continue to do so until you BOTH realise that things need to change.

I know - that's what really scares me. I don't think things will change as I just can't get through to my husband what a mess we're in... He's arranging a remortgage again now... Interest only - with no endowments to cover it (going to cash them in)... Said we can swap to a repayment mortage in a couple of years when we've got more money!!!

beyondhelp_2

Anniek1969 wrote:

Hi,
At first I just tried to ignore the debt but it eventually caught up with me, I took advice from the citizens advice bureau and with their help all of my creditors agreed to take smaller payments every month.

We've been on these payments for about 4yrs now and it's slowly getting paid back. We won't be debt free till about 2012 but at least we're getting there.

Well done you. This is exactly what I want to do but my hubby doesn't want the creditors to know that we can't cope because he doesn't want to get a bad credit rating... We NEED a bad credit rating so he can't borrow any more.