Debt out of control - please help

nic82

Just a couple of bits that stood out to me....

1) Electricity and gas both seem pretty high. I know you've got a four bedroom house, which must take quite a bit of heating, but could you turn off the radiator in the kitchen (if you have one). Heat from the cooker will warm the room, and when you're in the kitchen, you tend to be moving around (therefore keeping a bit warm) rather than sitting still which you are more likely to do in the lounge, for example.

What temperature do you have your heating set to? Lowering it a few degrees makes quite a lot of difference in the bills (I'm talking tens of pounds, not pennies!).

2) Can you freeze your OH's pension (although, since he isn't exactly "on side" at the moment, this may not be do-able at present).

3) Food bills - £450 is way too high, even if it is for 5 people and includes everything. From what you have said, I'm presuming three of those people are children. I reckon you should be able to get this down to £300. Ways of doing this include planning your meals, writing a shopping list and not deviating from it (don't take children or OH shopping with you!), taking advantage of all the BOGOF offers (but only if you will use the product and it replaces something else that was on your list). For more ideas, pop over to the Old Style board. They're really friendly and will have loads of ideas to help.

4) £150 for wine. I reckon it might actually be higher than this. If you divide the £150 by 60 (2 bottles a day X 30 days), this gives £2.50. Most wine is more expensive than this. And, without meaning to sound presumtious, your OH doesn't sound as though he is someone who would scrimp on his wine. Even if the wine was £3.50 per bottle, this would make £210 a month spent on wine.

4) Clothing and shoes. I realise that children are constantly growing and needing new clothes, school uniform (if they are school age) and shoes, but perhaps you could start shopping in charity shops and on ebay for general clothes. As for school uniforms, does the school run second-hand uniform sales that you could take advantage of? Probably a good idea for you and hubby not to buy any clothes for a while.

Um, that's all I can think of at the moment. I know more experienced people will be along soon and offer more detailed advice, but hopefully this will give you something to get your teeth into to begin with.

Good luck!
Nic

greyster

You can get cheaper broadband and install your own free parental controls. Type in google "free parental control software."

Try cutting back on wine or buying wine on "offer" ... Tesco has been doing it recently. 25% off but dont quote me on this. Stocking up on deals if you can afford it is a moneysaver in the long run by far. Not just for wine.

Give up smoking ... you'll see more of your grandchildren.

nic82

Ooops, it took me so long to write my message (how dare my boss interrupt me and give me some work to do!!! :rolleyes: ), other people have already replied with exactly the same info.

Sorry, didn't mean to duplicate.

Must type more quickly next time.....

dreamalittle

That is a lot of wine. Assuming you both drink equal amounts, and between you are drinking 2 bottles a day, say 5 days a week - that's about 45 units a week each! Not only can you not afford it, but that's no good for your health either. Recommended limits are 14 for women and 21 for men per week.

Sydney_2

Listen to the advice from Thefunkygibbons - he's an absolute whizz with money. You must be ruthless with hubby and start to take control before this situation gets any worse. Well done for taking the first step. I know you will get the best possible support on this site. Good Luck!

beyondhelp_2

Tell me about it! No I drink a glass or 2 at most - hubby drinks the rest... and yes I worry about his health but again "shouldn't worry"...

r.mac_2

well done for posting

most of this is probably a repeat - my my tuppence worth is:

1. look at Martins budgetting guide. I always thought my budgetting skills were good and couldn't understand why it never worked - his way really works and may be a good way to show your husband (and yourself) where and how they money gets spent.

2. If your income is variable - please budget using only the definately income. This will make your budget more realistic. any extra income from the month can immediately go towards your debt.

3. As mentioned by others, some of your outgoings are higher than they could be try searching around the site for tips on
cheaper broadband
gas and electric
food bills (this is huge!)
wine - if you can't live without out why not try and compromise with less bottles at a cheaper price?

4. have you got everything outlined in your budget - you mention a car but there is no car insurance (I may have just missed it though!)

5. After this point look at where you can cut back. This is the hardest bit - but can be really rewarding. i.e. do you need the car? can you and the kids make homemade cards and presents, can you swap dvd's with friends rather than renting or buying etc.

You are doing the right thing - why not print off this forum, show it to your husband and show him the steps you are taking to reduce it - but explain that as a family you all need to realise the problem and that means he needs to take the situation on board and give you his support and together you can do it as a team.

mountainofdebt

but is your hubby an 'image person' - by that I mean does the status of having a flash house, falshing the platinium credit card (sorry if I'm making assumptions here) more important to him than financial piece of mind?

If he is perhaps one idea would be to point out that you can't keep building on sand - at some point the metorphical building will come crashing down and the consequences will be alot worse than cutting back.

Interest-Ed

The difficulty is convincing the other person isn't it!!!! :eek: especially when it's the person you love.

What's the psychological argument which would win over the OH?? (OOps sorry darling I've accidentally burnt all the credit cards??)

Has he had his blood pressure etc. checked recently - this could be an argument for cutting back on the ciggies and drink.

We all only look at the short-term picture so you could try giving him a longer term view on things.

If you can use Martin's form or Excel carry on producing a list of all the outgoings, keep adding to it as you think of the extras.

Highlight the luxury items in red and total this up for what you you might spend over the next three years (for example). Then highlight the debts in the same way.

Once you've got this picture built up you can argue your corner more easily.
showing him how much the extravagances are costing, how much you can reduce your debts if you spend less on the treats and throw more money at the debts instead.

Perhaps there's some goal you could set - ie for a fantastic holiday in 5 years time, or something you would really like to do for or with the children.

Or try sticking notes around the house, in the car, wherever : "We can only afford to spend £XXX this month darling".

It will, I fear, depend on how much control you can get over the spending and how willing your hubbie will be to make the changes. The very best of luck.

After that the ideas on this site are F.a.b.!

magentadreamer

£450 Food - I'm sure you could make savings on that. Check out the money saving old style board on here - I spent just under £140 on food/cleaning stuff/pet food/toileteries etc last month
£150 Wine - a bottle a night per adult is one very serious problem,both health and finance wise.
£55.99 - when you're out of contract ditch them -use PAYG instead. NB the £150 cashback throw that at your credit card.
£26.98 - Broadband - how old are your kids? My DD age 8 surfs the net happily using her favourites. I occasionally pop my head over her shoulder to see what she's looking at -disney channel mainly. I can understand you wanting to protect your children tho' but if they're of an age where they're surfing CBBC or the like you've probably got nothing to fear.

Have you checked to see if your house insurance/utlities etc are the cheapest?