Blackruby's Better Day Challenge Diary

ZTD

Looks like you're stuck with the old-fashioned way. Have a look on the stop smoking thread on the main DFW board - they can give you loads of tips. Some of them couldn't get on with Allen Carr - there is someone else who wrote a book, whose name escapes me...

easyway

Blackruby wrote: »

Even tried the Allen Carr method, it didn't work which made me feel stupid coz Allen Carr said in his books that most people fail on his method coz they haven't understood something.

Hi Blackruby,

I used to run an Allen Carr clinic helping smokers to quit. I used to smoke 30 a day for around 26 years!

I read Allen's book, "Easyway to Stop Smoking" and stopped, virtually overnight. Seven months later I 'forgot' what I'd learned, got overconfident (stupid) and started smoking again.

Two years down the line, I read the book again and stopped for good.

My point in posting is this; during the 10 years I ran smoking cessation sessions I helped a lot of people, not all stopped successfully but many did. One chap in particular came to see me for FIVE sessions (one's supposed to be enough), he was an intelligent man and seemed to understand what was being said, he simply couldn't get his head around the final stopping and staying stopped bit. Anyway, this guy DID stop when the penny finally dropped and he now RUNS Allen's organisation in a fairly big region of the country!

Allen's method is really all about putting aside all of the reasons why we should stop smoking (Health, money, self-esteem, feeling of control etc...) and instead concentrates on destroying the illusion that there's any Upside to smoking at all. Once you remove the illusion that cigarettes calm you, help you cope, help you concentrate, enjoy nights out, enjoy mealtimes more, enjoy the afterglow of sex etc etc more than a non-smoker; the prospect of not smoking and the withdrawal from nicotine addiction become not only easy but enjoyable!

The problem smokers normally have when they try to quit using conventional methods is they believe they're 'giving up smoking', when you realise that there's nothing to give up and that the cigarettes not only do nothing for you but you actually gain huge benefits from simply stopping choking yourself, the process is easy!

Not having what you don't want, is the same as having what you want; it's only when you think you want something and can't have it, that it becomes a problem! (make sense?).

Read the book again kid and don't feel silly because you didn't stop first time. As a backup there is now a lot more help available through the NHS although I appreciate you not wanting to go down the 'drug' route of Champix or Zyban.

Anyway, best wishes Blackruby, it'll all work out in the end and keep away from those nasty hangovers and depression inducing morning after the night before memories!

Derek

Blackruby

Thank you to you both for the advice, I suppose knowing why I smoke would be a good starting point.

Top of the list, I smoke because I am bored (having recollections of allen carr at this point) because I'm not working and the boys are all at work during the day, I have nothing to do. Though I have a good trick around that, if I go out, I don't take my ciggie stuff (hate rolling in public) so if I am out all afternoon, then I don't have one.

It's hard to know how much I smoke in a day, all I know is the majority are smoked in the morning with coffee. I usually have had 2 or 3 before I've even been up for an hour. I think I smoke about 15 a day, it can be as low as 10 and it can be as high as 20.

Anyway, beautiful monday morning, trying to decide whether to go in to town and hand my form in and get my massage, or just to hand the form in at the office which is closer to me. The deciding point may be on how badly I want this massage.

Blackruby

Hello diary,

News, I have news! My homeless prevention officer rang me, saying she'd referred me to one of the hostels, which I have to ring on monday to confirm an appointment for an interview, she's referring me to the other one today. She said she'd spoke to my landlord *finally* and confirmed with him what I'd already said.

Spent most of yesterday hiding from the world, just watching stand up comedy in bed and ignoring everything except the phone. It wasn't hard because everyone went out to the cinema last night and didn't get home till late.

Gotta sign on today, got a big list of jobs I've applied for to show them. It's just my way of showing I have done something, whether or not it's effective, I dunno.

Hip and knee are playing up again, so I kinda want to get signed on, come back and chill.

Mum's moving back to the caravan today, dad's moved out. They are talking but not in a 'we're getting back together way' more in a 'we need to talk as our whole lives are connected' kinda way. Which is good in my mind coz Dad was avoiding her before and that was annoying.

Younger sister is feeling better after cracking her head open on the car door, still have no clue quite how she managed that.

Blackruby

Good news for me! Landlord just called, he's been asking around his landlord friends looking for people who could take me. He gave me some info on it, no deposit, fifty quid admin fee, over 21's only and DSS welcome, gave me her number and I just rang up and arranged a veiwing for tomorrow afternoon. Best part about it is that it's literally ten minutes walk from my current house. I could walk with my boxes of stuff down the street.

*does a little dance*

postingalwaysposting

Glad to see your tides are changing BR :j :j

Blackruby

Update!

I am fine, I've moved into a bedsit type thing, on housing benefit, no job but oh well. No internet as well so the only chance I get online is at the library. Visiting my mum and dad down in the caravan now so I have a bit more internet access but just thought I would post and let you know that I am alive and well.

Been CAB and entered into a payment plan for my debts too.

Ellidee

Miss you posting on Daily Chat honey. Good to see that you are fine. XX

Blackruby

Wow, It's been so long since I have posted. Just read through and identified a few recurring themes to update and address.

Hip: I have been told I need an operation on it but the NHS won't pay for it However it's not giving me too much jip lately, I just take life a lot slower now.

Parents: Dad is a full fledged alcoholic, though he wont admit it. I have cut him out my life for my own sanity and my Mum now lives up i Liverpool which is awesome! She actually lives in the bedsit I was living in up to a few months ago.

Alcohol and Depression: I can honestly say that I have not suffered a depression or alcohol related breakdown for over a year, and although it has taken a lot of work, I can now enjoy alcohol socially and sensibly like a 23 year old should.

Flat: I now share a flat with my boyfriend (J) and my best mate (Blue) who I mentioned before. He split up with (L) about a year ago now.

Smoking: I still smoke

Debts and job: I had a 6 month temp contract at the beginning of this year (which is where I met my boyfriend) finished that in July and I am now starting a permenant job with a definite plan to start paying off debts.

redsquirrel80

Nice to see you back here and congrats on the new job :T