Support for people with Depression

La-Cara

Miroslav wrote: »

Not really, sorry

Can never get near mine. Flatmate is always using it for her makeup

that really made me laugh :rotfl:hope you've had a good day miro

La-Cara

still lurking guys... you can't get rid of me that easily! I've been doing ok, obviously don't feel great all the time but it's a start I've been trying to keep myself busy by getting involved with various things at the uni. Work is going ok, have only got a few weeks left of my voluntary internship, and have started a new weekend job waitressing at weddings and I'm enjoying that.

Hope the regulars are doing ok, and welcome to any newbies :wave:

beachbeth

Miroslav wrote: »

Couldn't find much on that site and I haven't £18, but thanks for the link.

Sorry it wasn't of much help. It isn't the easiest of websites to find the info you're looking for but if you can find the information relevant to your situation then they talk a lot of sense.

mumhug

Hi all, not been feeling much like talking (or anything else). Feel a bit better today, so I thought I would pop in and say hi.
Good luck to miroslav on your medical.
Bizzybek well done on the weight loss.
Tiff thank you for the welcome,

Tiff_2

Hi guys!
Hoping we're as well as we can be this morning.
I'm a much happier Tiff now it's cooled down a little, although there's still the issue of all the anklebiters being off for half term. It seems like they're hardly in school anymore. Anyway, onwards and.....well, lets just start with onwards!

Tiffbits anyone?
sazzy - hey hunnie, how's you? I just wanted to wish you good luck with your counselling tonight. It's good to see you posting again too. It's lovely to hear you're both so happy - you deserve it! I'll be in touch soon hun - haven't forgotten you and I'll try and do a proper post later. Look after yourself hunnie and don't WORK too hard!
gem - where's you at angel? You're being muchly missed here! You do so much good on here with your posts, hun. I hope things are going well for you, gem. Drop us a line when you can angel. Thinking of you as always.

ettie b - and another guardian angel who's missing in action! How are you ettie hun? I hope things have improved for you health-wise and that the 'kids' are both well. Anything exciting going on? Take care hunnie.

katie-tulip - how are you hun? Thank you for your kind words - it's good to see you posting too. I hope you're behaving yourself down there? No more smartie-snatching for you and saz! Enjoy your day katie.

beks - my, you have been a busy bunny, haven't you beks?! I'm glad to hear things are manageable for you atm. Congratulations on the weight loss, beks! Could you do another 11 weeks and lose that much for me, please? Take care angel.

rose - a long overdue reply to you hun. I hope everything is going well and that you're finally living your dream. As cb2 said, you've come so far and I wish you every happiness. I'm very happy for you.

cara - I knew the roll call would bring you out of hiding! It sounds as though things are going really well at uni for you. It sounds as if you're on a roll atm and you should feel proud. Good luck with the job, hun.

cb2 - and what corner of the world are you in atm, hunnie? Your posts here are always interesting and you're also being missed on here. I know you have a hectic schedule but just wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you.

I'm sending a raucous Tiffy yowl out to elona, may, ilgd, shaz, beth, rbk, anni, sp, donnie, sf, amber, wvw, qb, flis and meyore, to name but a few. I know the thread tends to be quiet during the holidays but we haven't heard from you in a while and I hope all is well. It'd be great if you could just drop in and say hi.

Sending Tiffy hugs out to all those with appointments, treatments, meetings, counselling, assessments, work and to those who are struggling right now or who are poorly.
Be kind to yourself guys.
Much love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi miro!
How are you today? I'm fine hun, thanks for asking although the tins of pink salmon have been very scarce recently!
Now you know I'm not a professional hunnie, so please think everything over 30 or 40 times and consult a professional before acting on anything.

miro wrote:

I've asked the techie board and they made some suggestions, but...what I have done, i've done myself and it's at least turning on now.

That's great miro - and well done you. They're a nice bunch over there on the techie board.

miro wrote:

If I don't pass the medical, i'll have to challenge it. I just have no idea how and how long. By the time the appeal is heard, it may be too late I won't be putting on a brave front. That will defeat the object of me being there. I'll be honest and say all that I feel.

It's always worth challenging a decision that seems unfair. Don't worry about how to challenge it now, miro as they should explain it to you and we'll find out anyway. I can't say how long it will take if you do challenge it hun; it may be a month or so but I think it may depend on what evidence you're supplying them. Hopefully the stronger the evidence, the less likely they are to drag things out too much. I know the guys here will be here for you through this time. I'm glad you're going to tell them everything, miro. As you say, a false front won't help anyone.
Is this medical for the new ESA benefit? Can you tell me which benefit you're on atm and how long have you been claiming it, miro? Did your gp ever give you a diagnosis? Also hun, could you say which corner of the country you live in or which county, as that can probably help me access more relevant and localised links for you.

I've taken the liberty of moving your main paragraph around a bit, angel.

miro wrote:

I don't take meds. I've tried them in the past and I just don't like taking anything i'm unsure about. I don't go to my GP, even though I need too. Same with dentist and opticians. So I have no support and no medication...
That's just one problem. I no longer have counselling as my local free MIND counselling ended as they lost funding. I have been offered 50 minutes sessions for £15 elsewhere, but if I lose my medical, I lose nearly 1/3 of my money and won't be able to afford it.[/quote]
I quite respect your decision regarding taking meds, hunnie. I've had a few allergic reactions (nothing serious) to certain meds for various kinds of problems. It made me not want to try any kind of med because I became too anxious over what might happen. I think we're all very wary of meds connected with mental health. I have learned the trick of always asking the dr about how the med med might make me feel and why the dr has chosen to prescribe this med to me, regardless of what it is for. Having this information reassured me somewhat.
Thankfully, especially with meds for mental ill health, they tend to start you out on the minimum dose to avoid this and you are carefully monitored.
May I ask why you feel unsure about them? It's healthy to be cautious, so please don't think I'm having a go at you hun. It's just that there are many kinds of meds, even new ones, and if you can bring yourself to see your dr, you can discuss it with them. You are always the one who makes the choice in the end, hunnie.
May I also ask what stops you from returning to your gp and other health professionals, miro? Is it the feeling that nothing can help you?
I had the pleasure of getting to know you over time on this thread and know much of what you have been through angel and you certainly deserve to get help. Wouldn't it be worth checking in with your gp, either with or without flatmate accompanying you? You may be pleasantly surprised. If it's a group practice, go for the dr you like the best or feel the least like hurling through a window.
I'm encouraging you to consider this hun, (not the hurling part!), because they know what resources are available to you. For example, they may consider an assessment to see a psychologist who specialises in non-med therapy. This might mean that you can get your counselling free on the NHS instead. If you're dr has sent you to the practice counsellor and it hasn't worked for you, then you need to tell the dr that and say you feel you need something more specialised. You won't know what's out there for you until you go and see your gp, angel.
I know you don't like to make a fuss and feel like you should be sorting it yourself, but if it's not working then maybe it's worth just looking into other options at least. I know it takes a lot to admit you need help to someone and it's hard accepting it sometimes too. You work hard at being as little trouble as possible to anyone, hun and no-one who knows you could ever say that you don't try and help yourself.

miro wrote:

So I have no support and no medication. It may explain why I spend 12 hours in bed and the other 12 indoors most days, only going out when I need shopping usually. I don't usually get up until midday, but on occasions I can't sleep, I get up earlier and go bed earlier, but usually in bed 12 hours a day and the other 12, I wish I was back in bed as i'm always tired.
General everyday things are difficult. Housekeeping is half baked. My general hygeine is okay as I don't like feeling dirty, but I don't shave too often, so am often a bearded fella these days. I tend to let my washing build up and then chuck a few loads in on days when I feel not so low. Cooking wise, it's simple........bung it in the oven. No preperation food, I just don't have the energy.
I don't go to my GP, even though I need too. Same with dentist and opticians. I even bought some clippers so I didn't need to go to barber shop anymore.

Make sure you tell the dr tomorrow about all the things you've done to help yourself, including trying charity work to find your feet and get used to being around people and about attending the local MIND group and receiving counselling there. And also tell them all the things you've said here about how you feel and how you're affected, including your history because then they'll see why you're ill. It might be a good idea to spend an hour thinking and make a list. Make sure you tell them if you're depressed for more days than you aren't. Tell them you don't go out much and can't bring yourself to see the professionals. You should tell all this to your gp too, hunnie.

Sorry for all my waffling to you and the rst of the clan. I know for all the silly smileys and daft cat piccies I use, it probably puts people off what I'm trying to say, even when I use it for exactly the opposite reason, to try and make things a bit less formidable in what are very distressing circumstances.
I hope I haven't sounded patronising in any way miro hun - I'm not that kind of Tiff. I hope you know I have much respect for you.
Don't forget to get back to me regarding the benefit questions hunnie. I hope something here helps.
Be kind to yourself, miro.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Miroslav

La-Cara wrote: »

still lurking guys... you can't get rid of me that easily! I've been doing ok, obviously don't feel great all the time but it's a start I've been trying to keep myself busy by getting involved with various things at the uni. Work is going ok, have only got a few weeks left of my voluntary internship, and have started a new weekend job waitressing at weddings and I'm enjoying that.

Hope the regulars are doing ok, and welcome to any newbies :wave:

Nice to hear you are busy.

You'll be meeting Saz and Gillette soon then. What with waitressing at weddings and their relationship

When you do, spill the beans...does Saz really have smarties on toast

Miroslav

beachbeth wrote: »

Sorry it wasn't of much help. It isn't the easiest of websites to find the info you're looking for but if you can find the information relevant to your situation then they talk a lot of sense.

Yeah, the link was appreciated, but every corner I turned said I had to be a member

Their used to be links on this site to benefit medical points charts that showed the questions and how many points you may get.

They must have changed the system.

Miroslav

Tiff wrote: »

Hi miro!
How are you today? I'm fine hun, thanks for asking although the tins of pink salmon have been very scarce recently!
Now you know I'm not a professional hunnie, so please think everything over 30 or 40 times and consult a professional before acting on anything.


That's great miro - and well done you. They're a nice bunch over there on the techie board.


It's always worth challenging a decision that seems unfair. Don't worry about how to challenge it now, miro as they should explain it to you and we'll find out anyway. I can't say how long it will take if you do challenge it hun; it may be a month or so but I think it may depend on what evidence you're supplying them. Hopefully the stronger the evidence, the less likely they are to drag things out too much. I know the guys here will be here for you through this time. I'm glad you're going to tell them everything, miro. As you say, a false front won't help anyone.
Is this medical for the new ESA benefit? Can you tell me which benefit you're on atm and how long have you been claiming it, miro? Did your gp ever give you a diagnosis? Also hun, could you say which corner of the country you live in or which county, as that can probably help me access more relevant and localised links for you.

I've taken the liberty of moving your main paragraph around a bit, angel.

I quite respect your decision regarding taking meds, hunnie. I've had a few allergic reactions (nothing serious) to certain meds for various kinds of problems. It made me not want to try any kind of med because I became too anxious over what might happen. I think we're all very wary of meds connected with mental health. I have learned the trick of always asking the dr about how the med med might make me feel and why the dr has chosen to prescribe this med to me, regardless of what it is for. Having this information reassured me somewhat.
Thankfully, especially with meds for mental ill health, they tend to start you out on the minimum dose to avoid this and you are carefully monitored.
May I ask why you feel unsure about them? It's healthy to be cautious, so please don't think I'm having a go at you hun. It's just that there are many kinds of meds, even new ones, and if you can bring yourself to see your dr, you can discuss it with them. You are always the one who makes the choice in the end, hunnie.
May I also ask what stops you from returning to your gp and other health professionals, miro? Is it the feeling that nothing can help you?
I had the pleasure of getting to know you over time on this thread and know much of what you have been through angel and you certainly deserve to get help. Wouldn't it be worth checking in with your gp, either with or without flatmate accompanying you? You may be pleasantly surprised. If it's a group practice, go for the dr you like the best or feel the least like hurling through a window.
I'm encouraging you to consider this hun, (not the hurling part!), because they know what resources are available to you. For example, they may consider an assessment to see a psychologist who specialises in non-med therapy. This might mean that you can get your counselling free on the NHS instead. If you're dr has sent you to the practice counsellor and it hasn't worked for you, then you need to tell the dr that and say you feel you need something more specialised. You won't know what's out there for you until you go and see your gp, angel.
I know you don't like to make a fuss and feel like you should be sorting it yourself, but if it's not working then maybe it's worth just looking into other options at least. I know it takes a lot to admit you need help to someone and it's hard accepting it sometimes too. You work hard at being as little trouble as possible to anyone, hun and no-one who knows you could ever say that you don't try and help yourself.


Make sure you tell the dr tomorrow about all the things you've done to help yourself, including trying charity work to find your feet and get used to being around people and about attending the local MIND group and receiving counselling there. And also tell them all the things you've said here about how you feel and how you're affected, including your history because then they'll see why you're ill. It might be a good idea to spend an hour thinking and make a list. Make sure you tell them if you're depressed for more days than you aren't. Tell them you don't go out much and can't bring yourself to see the professionals. You should tell all this to your gp too, hunnie.

Sorry for all my waffling to you and the rst of the clan. I know for all the silly smileys and daft cat piccies I use, it probably puts people off what I'm trying to say, even when I use it for exactly the opposite reason, to try and make things a bit less formidable in what are very distressing circumstances.
I hope I haven't sounded patronising in any way miro hun - I'm not that kind of Tiff. I hope you know I have much respect for you.
Don't forget to get back to me regarding the benefit questions hunnie. I hope something here helps.
Be kind to yourself, miro.
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

:wave:

I'll reply in bits and keep editing, as PC freezes and the last thing I want is to write alot and then lose it all, so i'll type, post, edit, post etc etc...

Sorry about the Salmon. I wrote it on the shopping list and it got mistaken for Smarties. Now, I know my handwriting is pretty average, but not that bad. I sent Saz and Katie shopping, so something funny is going on there. They both came back in with big grins and chocolate around their mouths

I'll tell them as much as I can remember. You know how it is, after the event, you think of alot of things you needed to say. I'm not sure i'll be strong enough to challenge and how i'd get help, but i'll look into that when I fail the medical.

The benefit I am on, is income support with a small disability element (around £25). I don't qualify for DLA or any other benefit , Housing and Council Tax aside) Been on it for 4 years and my GP used to put on my sickness certificates, acute anxiety and/or anxiety and depression. Live in Somerset.

I just don't like medication full stop. I just don't feel respected if I have to go onto medication. It's like I then become someone reliant on some liquid and people will look down on me because of it. I may also then have to tell people in the future, especially if I somehow ever attract anyone. It would likely destroy and relationship. I know that for me, it wouldn't matter if the person came from my background, but i've not met a woman in years who thinks the way I do, so i'm going by past experiences.

With regards to not going to GP etc....they don't take me seriously and I never get the treatment I ask for, are told i'll get, or otherwise. Every physcial ailment is put down to 'depression' and with my dentists...the chap once told me he'd do soemthing, but when I got home, it was different to what I was told and he decided half way through not to do the rest. Another occasion, another dentist told me he'd do 2 fillings, gave me 2 injections, done 1 filling, ran out of time and/or got fed up and made the other hole into a chip, so he didn't have to complete the job. Who would take a depressed chaps complaint seriously? I fell they do what they want, to save their money and my health doesn't come first. I know others in the same boat.

I just feel people feel that I am a lost cause, just as much as I feel I do. People just don't believe i'm depressed or can't do things because of my physical appearance and quite possibly, because I am a man, and men are meant to be strong. I am physically, mentally i've suffered too much.

I will tell them what I have tried to do. Charity work, hospital placement and how all failed. Also about counselling and how it had to end due to lack of funds.

Should I take the list I make with me? Or does it look like I am overly prepared?

I appreciate your postings, I don't think of much tbh. I'd probably go tomorrow with no preperation and just be totally honest in that I hate life and I have no intention of sticking around, but i'd probably be locked up :rolleyes:

That should be my post totally edited and done. So many problems, so little time

Tulip

:hello: Everyone,

wipes the chocolate from my mouth at once to hide suspicion I hold my hands up saying I am not guilty but then I was sorting out the smartie cupboard and a few went into my hands and I shared with Saz as she had kindly offered to help me out

I am alright and had a good day.Used my new game today of Figure skating and its brilliant too.

watching Holby City soon.

love and light,

Katie xxx