Single and in Debt Part II

sarahb123_3

I have beed doing lots of things to try and put it off but there is nothing for it but to carry on.:rolleyes: Have now put 7 bags in the bin and will try the flylady thing of 45 mins work, 15 mins treat. Might just have another coffee first though...:D

ClipClop_3

Have done something very stupid!!! Decided to tell exOH that i still wanted hom, loved him etc.... only to discover that he has been seeing someone else for 5 weeks. Now feel like a complete idjut....hence the reason why i didn't come and see any of yo last night.

he wasn't bad in his response just confused apparently... said that he didn't realise i felt like that. Mmmm communication was never special between us.

not sure what to do now???? i reckon it is time to move on but not really feeling like that at the moment, feel physically sick and very very lonely.

lets see what the rest of the day brings. Have to go now as at work and don't want the sack really.

catch you all later, sorry didn't really have time to read anyone elses posts hope you are all having a lovely day x

makeup

Wow, Sarah, you are in the zone!!

Definitely you need a coffee for the energy buzz!

makeup

ClipClop wrote: »

Have done something very stupid!!! Decided to tell exOH that i still wanted hom, loved him etc.... only to discover that he has been seeing someone else for 5 weeks. Now feel like a complete idjut....hence the reason why i didn't come and see any of yo last night.

he wasn't bad in his response just confused apparently... said that he didn't realise i felt like that. Mmmm communication was never special between us.

not sure what to do now???? i reckon it is time to move on but not really feeling like that at the moment, feel physically sick and very very lonely.

lets see what the rest of the day brings. Have to go now as at work and don't want the sack really.

catch you all later, sorry didn't really have time to read anyone elses posts hope you are all having a lovely day x

Oh dear! That is a horrible situation. If I was you I wouldn't really try and do anything at the moment.

You need a bit of time to process it all and get a bit of distance. And it is difficult but if OH is seeing someone else then it seems like he has moved on and is in a different place now.

Do you have the next 4 days off work?

Hopefully you do!

Try and have a nice time, do things that you like doing and treat yourself (in a DFW way of course!!) Don't be hard on yourself and give yourself time to think it all over and decide what you want to do.

And my best advice iss try not to call him or text him - especially if you are feeling very emotional or have had a medicinal brandy....

Buffythedebtslayer

sarahb123 wrote: »

I have beed doing lots of things to try and put it off but there is nothing for it but to carry on.:rolleyes: Have now put 7 bags in the bin and will try the flylady thing of 45 mins work, 15 mins treat. Might just have another coffee first though...:D

Hello Sarahxxx Just popped in to check you aren't buried under a binliner!!

and Clipclop, I am sorry, at least he wasn't horrible about it and work will hopefully distract you abit. I wouldn't do anything re him just see what he says/does over the next few days.
Its all part of the crappy process I guess ((((((hugs)))))))) We have all been there.

I went into work and felt ok have got a !!!!!! one side of the head headache tho, but I am going to do a bit of my room this afternoon - set it up for working from home more.

but first pizza for lunch!!! and make a list

I too will fly lady, used to do it a lot and it was bloody good!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

sarahb123_3

ClipClop wrote: »

Have done something very stupid!!! Decided to tell exOH that i still wanted hom, loved him etc.... only to discover that he has been seeing someone else for 5 weeks. Now feel like a complete idjut....hence the reason why i didn't come and see any of yo last night.

he wasn't bad in his response just confused apparently... said that he didn't realise i felt like that. Mmmm communication was never special between us.

not sure what to do now???? i reckon it is time to move on but not really feeling like that at the moment, feel physically sick and very very lonely.

lets see what the rest of the day brings. Have to go now as at work and don't want the sack really.

catch you all later, sorry didn't really have time to read anyone elses posts hope you are all having a lovely day x

Aww, ClipClop, what a horrible situation to be in. Definitely agree with make up, try not to text or call, you don't want to appear clingy and it will give him time to think about it. If he does want to be with you I think he will be in touch pretty quickly, I would try to make sure you keep yourself busy for the next few days to take your mind off it.

If you don't hear from him in the next few days I would agree that it is definitely time to move on and you can start to make some positive plans for the future without always thinking "what if ...?" You have said it and now he knows how you feel, so if nothing comes of it you will at least know that you did your best and it is not to be and you can move on.

sarahb123_3

Well, I think the decluttering is done for now, I do not have anymore rubbish to throw out, but it still looks very untidy and cluttered, mainly with too many clothes and books.

So the next step will be over the Easter weekend, I will make as many bags of books as possible to take to the charity shop and tidy the bookshelves to fit what is left. Will have to be ruthless and take anything I don't think I will read again or need for reference. This will at least give me more room and be easier to keep tidy.

Will also repeat the above with the clothes, I am going to have to be absolutely ruthless this time as the last few times I have ended up thinking, "well, I might wear it and it's still in good condition." I have too many things like that and I have said that so many times, left them in the wardrobe and not worn them. They are taking up valuable space. :rolleyes:

I am determined to end these holidays feeling much less cluttered in my mind and I know the things I have and don't need are just overwhelming and suffocating me. I need to make space for new things in my life:j

Hollyberry

Hiya all :hello:

Welcome to the start of the long weekend, and commiserations to those of you who have to work...although I am hoping you will get some nice time off in peace and quiet to compensate.

Clarabella - I am sure you are most welcome here. :wave:

ClipClop - sorry to hear about the ex - that's a horrible situation to be in. I think Sarah is very wise to say that at least he knows how you feel and you won't be wondering about the what ifs. If you have the urge for late night texting while this is all still sinking in, come and talk to us instead, and we'll do our best to distract you. makeup's suggestions of treating yourself kindly in a DFW way are great too.

Buffy - hope the headache's lifting - that's miserable. Hopefully some good pizza carbs will help.

Sarah - :j have a second Golden Binbag Award. You are definitely in full sage mode, and those are more wise words about getting rid of the things that suffocate and overwhelm to make room for the new. :A That's really inspired me to gather my weapons of mass clearance and muck out the study this weekend.

I have a vast mound of "stuff" for eBay sitting in the corner, and if I get it all onto Turbolister by Sunday, I might be getting closer to making my £10 a day target for April. I could also do with running through the bookcases; I have ten full height and six full height ones in here, and they are full of many strange and random items as well as the books. To my right I can see:

• Sanctuary Mande Lular body scrub - lovely, but in the study
• Gradual tan - ditto
• Jewellery cleaner
• A small stuffed cow
• A stray purse
• A spare mouse (fair enough, at least there's something that should be here)
• Two pottery storage jars for lentejas and harina

You see my problem. I hope to be very busy over the next few days trotting off to the recycling and the charity shop. :cool:

Shoe_Gal

Hi everybody - Happy Easter :icotbaske

Diet declaration for today - cereal, egg mayo sandwich, cookie, chilli, garlic bread and 1 litre of water. Whoops - not too good today I usually get weighed on Fridays so not feeling too confident!

Glad to be home for the long weekend, have a headache so an early night for me.

Going to start on my master plan tomorrow and then have Mum and Dad coming to dinner. Need to tidy my apartment, do some shopping (not shoe shopping unfortunately ) and it would be fab to fit some exercise in :rolleyes:

Sarah - well done on the decluttering :A, it's putting me to shame as I know it is something I need to do

sarahb123_3

Hi all, have to say the decluttering has been very cathartic, it is actually more untidy here than when I started but I can feel the benefits, can't actually believe that the room is not empty after 7 1/2 bags of rubbish and still no licence:mad: but have decided that it being untidy will spur me on to do the books and clothes.

Thank you Hollyberry for your own bookcase assessment, we appear to share the same type of bookcase as from here I can see a box of toffees, 2 wine stoppers, a scart thing, a presentation mug, a dust bag for a handbag, 1000 envelopes, a step counter, a corkscrew and a scented candle (I feel flames near books is an excellent idea:rolleyes:.)

I do strongly believe that it will be very beneficial to remove as much as I can- a Chinese proverb I heard recently is, "you cannot have your dessert until you have cleared your plate"- so I am trying to clear as much as I can.

I cannot remember how many toiletry/make up things I discovered in an assessment of my room before Christmas but I know it was over 200. :eek:I don't need that many and I don't want to throw them out. Does any one know if charity shops will accept them? I am not bothered about losing money as in many cases I paid pennies for them - see Boots thread- so not interested in ebaying, but any other ideas gratefully received.