Single and in Debt Part II

gwen80

Hello Summer

I'm sorry you're not feeling too great at the moment. Your situation sounds similar to mine. You'll find loads of good ideas here to help you pay off your debt, save money and get out and meet more people. I may not be the most qualified person to answer your post as I haven't been posting here for long myself, but check out this board for debt busting advice.

I'm currently trying to get myself out a bit more aswell, but it's hard when you're also in debt, trying to save and working long hours. Just as a suggestion, is there a walking/rambling group near you? I've been thinking about going along to one as I figure it's a cheap way of getting out and meeting people with plenty of opportunity to chat and get to know people as you walk along.

In terms of holidays I think some groups may organise trips although I have no idea how expensive they might be. I'll have a think for more ideas esp about holidays, but keep posting. There is so much support here, you're in the right place. I'm pretty much in the same situation you are and the only thing that keeps me going at the moment is the sporadic weekends with my friends that live all over the country.

Take care

Gwenx

Edited to say: Well done you for getting out to the canoe and climbing clubs. It's difficult going along to these things when you don't know anybody and I know a lot of people who never would, so that's brilliant.

sarahb123_3

Hi Summer and welcome to the thread. Sorry to hear you are feeling so down at the moment, we all feel like that sometimes so don't worry, you will come out the other end. In the meantime you are in the right place for lots of support with being single and in debt, being able to meet people, increasing income and managing to pay things off. We all struggle with those and you are not alone, but this forum is a brilliant place to chat to people and pick up tips.

It is not all pointless at all, I know it seems like that at times but you are welcome to come on here and vent at any time, I personally use this thread to stamp my feet on a daily basis so please join in:D

As regards meeting people I think it is brilliant that you have joined canoeing and climbing groups, that way you get to keep fit and meet lots of people at the same time, on upping your income have you tried using cashback sites, you don't get a huge amount but it can be £100s a year depending on how you use it, also a lot of people do surveys or mystery shopping which you could fit in in your own time and earn money at the same time. If you put your SOA up on the main board- it will show you on there how to do it- the lovely people on here will be able to show you how to cut back further.

The best thing to do is just keep reading the different boards, that's how I started and you will quickly pick up lots of tips and ideas and of course come on here for a chat, we are very friendly and you are most welcome.

makeup

Hi Summer

Welcome to the board! I would totally agree with the others.

Regarding cheap holidays, do you have any friends overseas who you can shamelessly exploit? Most people overseas are used to having people to stay and welcome the chance to catch up with someone from home. A friend of mine lives in Tenerife and that has been a total lifesaver. I've normally managed to get a cheap flight over there and it is generally pretty cheap. We don't to anything too expensive just fun things like hitting the beach or the pool and a few nice meals out.

Otherwise, what about joining the YHA - I did that this year with my Tesco Clubcard points. That can be a cheap thing to do and sometimes they offer special weekends around a theme or activity (like mountain biking or similar)

I've stayed in hostels on my own and I find it perfectly safe. I prefer to book a female only room but have never had any issues at all. You can always check out a hostel on Tripadvisor or similar.

Another idea, which isn't for everyone but I am a Catholic and at our church there was an ad for a 30s group. I joined the mailing list although haven't attended anything yet. They organise lots of different things, sometimes religious things like masses but sometimes purely social things like a trip round an exhibition or a walk around a beauty spot. They also arrange trips like retreats which are very reasonable indeed.

I don't know if you have any involvement in any church but other denominations may have similar things??


My final thought is that you mentioned that your friends were married and planning families etc and you seemed to mention this as a reason not to visit.

I was out with a friend of mine (married a year, planning a baby soon) and I was moaning that I am often free on weekends - I go out a lot with friends during the week but on weekends my friends are all busy with husbands etc. She then complained that once she got married everyone stopped ringing her to invite her to stuff.

So last weekend she rang me on Sunday inviting me to a spontaneous bbq - I went and had a fab time and have resolved to call her more often for weekend things.

I am sure there are some people out there who do become very closed once they get married but I have found that lots of my newly married pals are happy to see old friends and catch up on something new and hear news from someone else.

Also why not mention holidays to your friends, I went on hols last year with my friend a few months before her wedding. Her husband doesn't get as many holidays as her and also she is much more into holidays that he is. We had a fab time. You never know, maybe one of your hooked up friends is the same??!

RE: upping your income - a real a bit of someone's diary earlier this week and she had cleared a massive amount off her debts by working for AQA - i'm not sure how it works but maybe someone here can advise more about it. I think you are answerings questions for people and you basically just log on to your computer when you are free so is very flexible.

I think you have a lot to be proud of, you have made sacrifices to pursue your career and have made real efforts towards meeting new friends. Anyway feel free to vent on here and enjoy!

makeup

TDQO - you have reminded me of my days as a holiday rep in Italy. A couple of other reps were busy colouring in a map of Europe as and when they had 'met' a lady of that particular country. My friend was particularly delighted when the new Polish holiday rep arrived...... (they were sorely disappointed when rumours of a Swedish rep proved to be unfounded)

RosaBernicia

Hi Summer

Welcome, also sorry to hear you're feeling a bit lost - it is hard enough to settle somewhere new and working madly doesn't help. Would a dodgy hug be any use? :grouphug: I hope your work has calmed down now.

Have you got to know your new area? If you still have places to explore, perhaps you could take time off and have a 'holiday' or a couple of long weekends in your own town. That would be cheap and also mean you could do things where you might meet new people. I know if I had the time I could happily fill a week pottering round museums and art galleries, perhaps to lectures so I could be sure of bumping into people, and hanging round coffee shops.

And with your friends who are settled, keep an ear out for when they might have a weekend free so you could visit or they could come to you. A friend of mine is coming over next weekend, I always tell her she can bring her husband but she likes to have some 'girlie' time and he's away for work next weekend so it works out well. You just might find some times that suit you both.

I am a bit of an evening class addict, but it doesn't work very well with deadlines and long hours - the tutor has a good laugh every time I pelt in late still in my work suit. I also applaud you going to the canoeing and climbing clubs, very brave :T.

From what you've said about your work it sounds quite pressured - it is the kind of place you get to know your team? Is there anybody there who you'd like to know outside of work, or would you rather be able to leave it behind when you go home?

Anyway there's a few thoughts, hang around a while and I'm sure we can keep you entertained if nothing else

Rosa xx

Summer74_2

Thank you all for your responses. Rosa I do work in a team and although they don't know about my financial situation they know that I am lonely and are being very supportive but they all have their own families. My job involves co-ordinating teams and getting them to hit deadlines and in order to do that I really need the respect of my colleagues so need to be confident and firm.

I have just hd a look at the AQA site and there are no vacancies in the UK. Is there anything else I can look at? Somebody mentioned surveys. How do you find legitimate sites? I will feel better if I can see things starting to change.

Thanks again for your support.

sarahb123_3

Hi Summer, I definitely recommend quidco for making extra money, it is a cashback website which gives you money when you buy things over the internet, anything from car insurance to shoes:D I have been a member for 18 months and made about £450 and have another £100 to come. I never buy anything now without checking for cashback first. There are lots of cashback sites and some of them have daily clicks and you can apparently make £200ish a year with these.

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/shopping/cashback-websites (cashback sites)


http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=609037&highlight=cashback (daily clicks)

If you look at the weekly email there is a link to the past emails and last week's had a good item for surveys.

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/protect/make-money-surveys


There is also Pigsback which is not great, it has taken me a year to get a £20 amazon voucher but it does mean I will be getting some free books. They also have lots of competitions where you can win points.

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=1629153&highlight=pigsback

I also have a cashback credit card so I get money whenever I spend on it.

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/cards/cashback-credit-cards

I have a Boots card, nectar card and tesco card for loyalty points, some more info here:

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/shopping/loyalty-scheme-tricks

I try to never buy a single thing without looking at how I can get some money back even if it is only loyalty points:D

Also try these for looking for bargains:

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/forumdisplay.html?f=175 (food and groceries)

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=1670567 (Boots- good for getting toiletries and make up really cheaply)

Hope that helps.

TDQO

Morning all, I'm sitting here surrounded by empty beer bottles, over flowing ashtrays and various personal effects that were abandoned last night. All signs of a bloody good party

There was lots of flirting and touchy-feely but nothing else so far... it's all going to be repeated in a mere 8hrs or so, woo!

Welcome in Summer74 you'll find plenty of help in here

FeeFee

Morning all
Awake with the dawn chorus this morning despite it being bl00ming saturday, whats that all about?????
Might be a guilty conscience as I had a shopping day with a girly friend yesterday and slightly splurged on *skirt,top,linen trousers,sandals, earrings,more earrings, belt*:eek::eek: No wedges tho!!
Sounds like you are having a busy weekend TDQ
Welcome summer, come and offload on this board and we will help to get you through they are all really fab peeps on here and wonderfully fallibly human too.. so no lectures.. (or at least I'm hoping to get away with my splurge anyway!)
Might be seeing 'the boy' later, depends how late it gets cos I'm out with some friends for the afternoon.. have told him I'll let him know
Hope you've all got some of this lovely summer sunshine :j:j

moo2moo

Summer just because your friends are smug marrieds doesn't mean they don't appreciate the excuse to behave like singlies once in a while. We're expecting a long term singlie friend to stay for 10 days over the school summer hols. It means we'll make the effort to take him to all the local touristy places which we never seem to do because we're on the doorstep. Hes bringing his puppy but we're not entirely sure it'll get on with our dog so hes bringing a tent as a contingency plan. The DDs are planning to move into the garden regardless because its a fab excuse to pretend they're on holiday too. Hes a huge part of our family, best friend to the OH and a surrogate uncle to the DDs.

Global Test market are a great survey company and pay even when you're screened out of surveys. Avoid Toluna and Ciao like the plague as they take an eternity to obtain any rewards.