Avoiding payments

HeatherH

Ok I'll try and keep this short

Me and my ex have a 4 yr old together and we split in oct 05. Back then we mad an agreement for just over a year that we would have our son for 2 weeks each, and with this I would give him £40 of the tax credits I received for him. If I didn't have enough he would verbally threaten me.

When my ex started to blank my requests to know how my son was, I decided to take him to court for better custody arrangements. This happened in March 2007, I won the case, and both of us still have parental responsibility, as I now have my son for most of the time, and my ex has him for school holidays (bar the summer hols) and every 3rd weekend in the term.

Anyways... since the court case, it was agreed that I could stop giving him tax credits money, and that my ex would send me maintenance money through my bank... well that never happened. I then got the CSA involved in april 07 and it took them til July 07 to assess him (after various lost forms etc) My ex failed to pay this, and it went through the whole system and they ended up trying to take it out of his wages... that never happened, by the time they were able to enforce it, he apparently had been let go by the company. So he was reassesed again...

Even when he was claiming dole money, the CSA apparently said he had a protected amount he could keep (this was lies because it's usually £5 from JSA as far as I know) He then became employed again, I had to tell the CSA this as they seemed to know nothing. and after my ex failing to pay his due money, I finally got some payments out of his wages. I ended up having 2 months of payments, totalling about £70. I haven't seen any money since.

Every time he gets reassessed, he will avoid paying money, he wont answer the phone to them, and as soon as he's about to have his wages cut, he suddenly changes jobs again! He tells me he's paid, but the csa says he hasn't, and to be honest, out of the two of them I'd rather believe the CSA as my ex wasn't really the most honest type!

At the moment, I have a CSA worker that seems very motivated to catch my ex out, but still i don't see anything getting done. Is there anything that can be done about this?

Thanks in advance

Heather

Hawkmoon69

This is the type of guy the agency was set up to try track down and enforce payments upon.

Unfortunately its guys like me who the agency see as easy tagets and hammer to make the books balance.
Stop him from seeing his kid n see how long before he gives you money to support. Use the courts to keep him away and call the cops if he threatens you. Also keep a diary of every thing he says that may be threatening as this can be used as evidence...but never ever lie.


Good luck.

Cassa

I was in this situation for many years, it's incredibly frustrating & I wish you well.

tamsin1982

I wouldnt agree with stopping contact, children need thier parents more than any material item that money can buy!!

are you able to talk to him? He needs to realise he will be running from them forever if he doesnt start paying. even when your child is no longer a child he will still be liable to pay this money so he may as well face up to things now rather than get a bill for thousands later on.
there is nothin anyone ca really do at the moment, it is just a game of waiting for him to realise he cant run from responsibility

gratefulforhelp_2

My ex does this exact same thing. There are sites that send out newsletters to absent parents telling them how to avoid paying.
You need to keep records of who you speak to and when, and if you get nonsense from them, then ask to speak to their line manager.
They are a full time job, you have to keep on their case.
Don't deny him contact unless there are issues about the welfare of your children, however tempting it seems, you need to keep the moral high ground! and do the right thing by your kids.
Huge good luck!

Mr_Green_Genes

Hawkmoon69 wrote: »

Stop him from seeing his kid...

Morally outrageous and, since you say the current arrangements are the result of a court order, illegal. do not take this advice, it's totally wrong.

HeatherH

Thanks Green Genes, I was waiting for someone to notice the court order bit. It would ruffle his feathers like mad if I kept him away, but only because of the people around him. I personally feel that he wouldn't actually care. I'm not someone that is strong enough to start an argument with his son. This would open a whole new can of worms about how much he lies. At the moment I don't actually need money from him, it's just the principle that he's not taking on the responsibilities of something we both started. I'd be happy if he just gave 1p a week, as long as it was something to show that he cared about his son's upbringing.

Mr_Green_Genes

Heather, don't get me wrong, I have no truck with people who refuse to face their financial responsibilities but some years ago when my ex took the children away from me, she banned access for several months, basically because she could. I had to go to court to get that sorted out so I'm very sensitive about it.

I get the point about the idea of a token payment, but if I were you, I'd want a little more than a penny. You couldn't buy a :beer: with that!!!

HeatherH

I'll never stop my son from seeing his dad. All of this is for the benefit of my son, he loves his dad to pieces and I'd never want to damage that bond in any way. I'll just have to see what happens in the next year. If there's not much else i can do with the CSA, then it's just a game of waiting

HeatherH

After reading more posts, I decided to ring up the CSA and mentioned the compliance department.. The bloke said that he would pass it on, but because my ex is playing hard to get, it still might not get us any further. Anyways fingers crossed

gratefulforhelp_2

It shouldn't matter if the ex is playing hard to get. They have systems in place to get the appropriate amount of money for your kid/s.

Ring them, and make a nuisance of yourself until they use their statutory powers to get your kid/s their due.