Please Help!!!Husband moved money out of our joint account

snowmaid

paperclip100 wrote: »

Sounds like he does'nt trust you with the purse strings

Neh, I would say its a case of yet another male who is probably thinking of leaving his wife and wants to furnish his 2nd nest at the expense of the first.

arunadasi

snowmaid wrote: »

This type of attitude stinks. They are in a marriage, a unity. She has 'sacrificed' her career/life to be at home with THEIR children. She could have gone off to work to earn her OWN money, but stayed at home to look after THEIR kids. She has saved him a fortune in childcare fees and domestic help. She has stayed at home cleaning, ironing, cooking, wiping noses, enabling him to earn his money.

She is entitled to a portion of his salary because she has been damn well earning it while running after his butt at home.

And no, I am not a stay at home mum. I hold a full time job.

I agree with this. Frankly, I am surpried at the attitudes expressed till now; is it really the law in the UK, that he can keep all his money if his wife is not working?

I lived in Germany and there he would be REQUIRED to pay her a specific amount of maintenance for herself and the children until she gets her own income. In fact, in Germany she also has a claim on his retrement fund; my husband's ex-wife gets EUR 800 a month from his pension for the rest of her life, even though they are divorced for almost two decades, simply because she was a stay at home mother and didn't have her own retirement fund. It hurts financially but I can only say it is fair.

brownbabygirl

what he is doing is VERY wicked IMHO

Mutter_2

This from the CAB website;

"If a married couple has a joint bank account, the money is owned jointly regardless of who put it into the account. On the death of one partner, the whole account immediately becomes the property of the other. Debts and overdrafts relating to a joint bank account will be the responsibility of both or either partner, irrespective of who incurred them."

And from a government website;

Marriage
[FONT=Trebuchet MS,Trebuchet MS]In the UK, marriage can only be contracted between a man and a woman. It is essentially a contract to live together and support each other, and this includes financial support.
[/FONT]

Nikabella

snowmaid wrote: »

This type of attitude stinks. They are in a marriage, a unity. She has 'sacrificed' her career/life to be at home with THEIR children. She could have gone off to work to earn her OWN money, but stayed at home to look after THEIR kids. She has saved him a fortune in childcare fees and domestic help. She has stayed at home cleaning, ironing, cooking, wiping noses, enabling him to earn his money.

She is entitled to a portion of his salary because she has been damn well earning it while running after his butt at home.

And no, I am not a stay at home mum. I hold a full time job.

I completely agree, and no, I'm not a SAHM either! I think he is being completely unreasonable & I really feel for the OP. Being a SAHM is a job - I expect she works a lot longer hours than he does & being at home looking after 2 children is hard work!

Perhaps OP should make a spreadsheet showing her OH how she can go back to work, like he seems to be trying to force her to, & how the price of childcare will likely completely offset this - although it doesn't sound like he's prepared to lissten to reason.

In the current economic climate it is likely to be more difficult for the OP to find a job but to prepare for the worst it might be worth her finding an evening job & leaving her OH to look after the children!

I'm afraid it does sound like he could be trying to feather another nest.

A.x

Merry_Gentry

Danio

You need to speak to your local council. If you and your husband are splitting up (not saying that you are, but he seems to be preparing the way) then you need to find out where you stand.

Check out https://www.entitledto.com to find out what benefits you can get to help you and the children.

You can't force him to pay money into the joint account but you do need to communicate to him your concerns. Whether you are together or not, he has a responsibility to his children.

glossgal

What an evil s.o.b this man must be-daring to have a sole account in the anticipation of a break up but still commiting to pay bills and cover OP's daily expenses-I say burn him :rolleyes:

Caroline73_2

When I split up with my ex I got a reasonable amount of money for our child and then I got a job to cover my expenses.

This man is being more than reasonable, the OP says the marriage has been in serious crisis for sometime. The man is going to pay mortgage, insurance etc and pay for food and other everyday expenditure - what more can he do?

It's not divorce that is wrong with this world but the people who think that when they split up that they should fleece their ex for every penny they have!

That wasn't aimed at danio - to answer your question, you can see a solicitor and get a contract written up. Your ex sounds like he is being reasonable so why not suggest you go together as it will be beneficial.

whitewing

It is a frightening time for the OP as presumably the decision to split up at this point has been taken out of her hands. It is understandable that she wants to know exactly where she stands, rather than rely on some vague 'I'll cover the bills'.

seven-day-weekend

Providing he continues to honour his financial commitments towards his family then I don't think that he is doing anything wrong with having a sole account.

It does suggest difficulty within the marriage that this has not been a joint decision but the OP has already said that this is the case.

If I were the OP I would be looking for a job pdq. Even if her husband does continue to pay the bills, she still needs to be in a position where she can support herself, in case the marriage finally breaks down.