What a mess, split up with husband and house problems

beryldog

Just a final thought before I go off to bed. I wouldn't pay much attention to what your husband says about keeping you financially afloat. It is mind games and probably out of guilt. When he has another partner she will soon put paid to that anyway. What I did that helped, was take in a language student, in my area you get £95 per week, we all had to squeeze up to create a spare bedroom but it went down very well before the judge. He could see I was doing everything to protect my childrens home.
It's good to allow him to see the kids when ever he can, not just for them, but the court will frown upon you if you make it difficult. You are in a game now and you need every brownie point you can muster. Keep focused on the kids and you WILL win.
Best wishes

Zoetoes

You don't have to sell the house until either your youngest reaches 16 or older & in full time education.

Claim for Income Support & they pay the interest on your mortgage, you will also be entitled to free prescriptions etc, free school meals

Everything will work out, you won't have to leave your home, after all, it's bad enough for the kids that mum & dad have split up, they don't want to leave their home aswell.

Good luck x

black-saturn

TBH would you want your ex to carry on paying for you? I certainly wouldnt. After a while you will feel much better standing on your own two feet.

jules-2005

Well an update from me, I've been to the CAB who can't fit me in for an appointment until 13th February although they have given me a booklet about separation and divorce to be going on with. I popped in to a couple of solicitors in town and they don't do free 1/2 hours anymore. They want £40 inc Vat for a half hour consultation. I'll be going through the yellow pages later to see if I can find someone in the area who will give me some free initial advice.

Black saturn, I agree with you about standing on my own two feet but he will be paying for his children. If I have to go back to work, so be it. I was a quite highly paid Train Planning manager for Railtrack so I'm sure I could go back to what I was doing before although I would prefer part time so I don't miss out too much on the kids growing up. Actually thinking about it I would love to go back to what I was doing as I really enjoyed my job.

black-saturn

If your a lone parent and on benefit at the moment you should get legal help under legal aid for free.

Spendless

jules-2005 wrote:

Well an update from me, I've been to the CAB who can't fit me in for an appointment until 13th February although they have given me a booklet about separation and divorce to be going on with. I popped in to a couple of solicitors in town and they don't do free 1/2 hours anymore. They want £40 inc Vat for a half hour consultation. I'll be going through the yellow pages later to see if I can find someone in the area who will give me some free initial advice.

Have you got legal cover with any insurances you might have, house, car? I don't know if they can give you info on any general legal advise but might be worth digging out a policy and having a read-thru.

jules-2005

Thats a good idea spendless, I know I have legal cover on my car insurance, I'll dig it out once the kids are in bed and have a read through.

Black Saturn I'm not on benefits. I get child tax credit but thats only because I don't work (I'm a stay at home mum) and ex husband to be is on low variable income self employed and is a trainee retained fireman until February when he qualifies which doesn't pay much at the moment.

Becles

If you are stay at home Mam with no income, you will get Legal Aid.

Go here and select one who is specialised in Family Law:
http://www.lawsociety.org.uk/choosingandusing/findasolicitor.law
Make sure (s)he is also a member of a Family Panel, as this means they have extra training in divorce laws.

I didn't get a Financial Consent Order when I got divorced and my ex later tried to get extra money from me. I got Legal Aid, even though I was working part time and got tax credits. I just scraped in under the income limit though!

black-saturn

Not only that but if you are a lone parent and not working you are also entitled to income support, not just tax credits.

tango

hi jules,sorry havent got any practical advice, you may not think it at the moment, but this could well be the start of a whole new you,everyone has offered some great advice,and i hope it is a comfort to know that people care :A