The Green Eyed Monster....

tara747

We are all capable of jealousy Maybee. We just need to acknowledge it, be happy with our choices and count our blessings. I know that every time my friends blow their entire salary on very beautiful tat, they are sacrificing the ability to do other things (for example go on holiday) and save for the future etc.

Nargleblast

Cazzdevil wrote: »

I remember reading someone's signature on here once and since then it's become my life motto, it read something like:

"Never try and keep up with the Jones' cos they're up to their eyeballs in debt!".

To add to that life motto, how about "Why keep up with the Jones's when you can drag them down to your level?"

paybacktime2008

I have friends who have; those lovely 'venture' photos showing a 'happy' family, a 4x4, every game console ever made, racks of dvds, cds, games. 2 yes 2 flat screen tellies, new outfits, new furniture etc etc.

They are now about to be repossessed and divorce.

I don't feel jealous of them. I feel pity.

Dex

Hello All,

I really enjoyed reading this, I am not feeling jealous as such at the moment but am confused, I need to buy a new car I have a 11 year old car and I drive a lot on business its company policy that I need a car under 10 years old, plus my car is incredibly impractical, its a little two seater but I love it and it has never cost me money, but I know that it may start to soon... I have been looking at all these gorgeous used cars but after reading this I have realised that as much as I want a particular car(s) I will just have to swallow it and get something sensible.

Dex

Lottebear

We used to have this problem until the other day...

My husbands step brother very much the goldern boy of family has an excellent job was unable to pay for some shopping his card was declined, because he did have a enough cash due to the fact he is paying 3 morgages and is unable to sell the homes.

We however are looking at buying a home and have over 11k in savings. We smiled.

loocyloo

i have a dear old friend, who with circumstances beyond her control, is on her own with 5 children.

she gets maintenance for the children, and every other weekend 'off'. she also rents a small house that the council pay the rent for. (the children all share bedrooms) she only has a small car and doesn't work.

YET, they have a couple of holidays a year, and has been to USA/disney etc.
she spends a fortune on their birthday/christmas presents ( £2-300 EACH minimum) and is always having new clothes/computors etc.

another friend and i often wonder how? we both work, so do our OHs and we can't afford what she does.

but we would both prefer to be where we are.

steerpike

Loocyloo - I am equally puzzled by this...but on the other hand, I do know plenty of others that struggle to manage on benefits.

I guess its a question of priorities, my friend and family go abroad twice a year but its jam and bread every night for tea.....

I think the best thing to do when the green eyed monster emerges is to count your blessings - its an old but true saying that the best things in life can't be bought with money...love & affection....family....children...health...

A beautiful sunset ... a walk in the park in springtime or through autumn leaves,,,a baby's smile......paddling on the seashore...all free and can be enjoyed by millionaire and pauper alike...

TurnaroundSue

Mudbath wrote: »

Hiya
I've found the positive side to being in debt means that once we're out of debt we're (hopefully) more likely to think twice before we buy. I can honestly say that now i'm debt free (all of a day!!!) that I won't be rushing out on a spending spree. I think it will be nice in the coming months to think 'well I could get that if I wanted to' but I can't see me splashing out too much. A few treats yes but all of a sudden I don't need x, y and z to make life fantastic. We're going out for a meal on Saturday night and i've printed out one of the vouchers from this forum to get 50% off - I may as well keep half the money if I can!!! Hope you all have a fab day xx

We became debt free last year and staying out of debt is just as hard as getting out of debt. I really want a new 3 piece suite, but do I NEED it? No; Can I afford to buy it? Yes; Could I afford the monthly payments on any loan/hp agreement? Yes; Have I got enough in my savings to buy it outright? Yes - so why haven't I bought it then? The answer: I don't want to have to borrow the money and I don't want to use my savings either - and as it is a WANT rather than a NEED I have decided that until the time comes that we NEED a new one then I will stay with the trusty old one I have already!!

But it is knowing that I could afford to buy but that gives the most satisfaction (and smugness:o ). And even after saying all of that there are times when the green eyed monster appears, but it my choice of not ever getting into debt again and being where I am now that makes it that much easier to deal with. And it's at those times when I count my blessings.

Good luck to everyone who are dealing with the debts and not giving into pressures from friends/family/envy/ or whatever:A

tara747

Lottebear wrote: »

We used to have this problem until the other day...

My husbands step brother very much the goldern boy of family has an excellent job was unable to pay for some shopping his card was declined, because he did have a enough cash due to the fact he is paying 3 morgages and is unable to sell the homes.

We however are looking at buying a home and have over 11k in savings. We smiled.

I'm sure this is a common story!!! :cool:

debtdesperado

Hmmm ... let's not be too smug - that's almost as unattractive as being jealous!

Oh how I wish I hadn't gradually built up this amount of debt... I had fun doing it but am certainly feeling the pain now. But I think it is a life lesson that is a valuable one, and I wouldn't swap the knowledge that I can pull myself up by my bootstraps and sort myself out for a lifetime of never having made a mistake.

I do earn a good wage, but am currently terrified that I will be made redundant, and so all my careful budgeting and debtbusting slog will all be for nothing. Fingers crossed...

The best lesson I have learnt is why it's not a good thing to build up debt - because it ties you down. Suddenly, you can't up sticks and travel round the world. You can't afford the wedding you want. You can't afford to have a baby. You can't afford to stay at home and look after your children. You can't pursue your hobbies because they wouldn't pay as much as your sensible job, which you have to do all the hours you can. IMHO, debt stops you doing all the things that make life worth living.

Instead, you get buried under a deluge of stuff. It ties you to a treadmill of work, day in, day out, to meet ever growing payments, to afford an ever bigger mortgage, on a bigger house that you have to fill with even more stuff, which you have to spend longer on cleaning....it's all drudgery.

I swear I am never NEVER going to get in this position again - I am going to get debt-free, I am going to build up a comfortable level of cash for emergencies, I will teach myself to buy things wisely and to buy no more than I need, I will pay my mortgage off, I will save for my retirement, which will be as soon as possible and then I will follow my dreams....

I recommend reading Rich Dad, Poor Dad... I thought it was really good on making you think about why you need to keep on the more, more, more treadmill.

Good thread Fascinated!